Would you go out in this storm?

[blinddoorshyt]

Well it's not meant to hit my area (north east coast ) till around 11am but I'm meant to be heading to Durham (1 hour train ) for a festive afternoon tea with a friend.
She lives in Durham and says it's okay for now.
According to the weather like I say it's moving over this way.
Would you risk it ?
Or not ?

I really don't understand why you're torn. It's a no brainer. I wouldn't be going out if I was relying on public transport in a named storm. It's only tea, not her wedding or something!! Why on earth can't you rearrange?

I absolutely wouldn't go, and she's not much of a friend if she's annoyed about it.

If the situation was reversed, would she be travelling an hour on a train to see you? I doubt it.

Bloody hell, I wouldn't expect a friend to battle the elements and I'd be concerned about her getting stranded!

She's no friend!

But maybe OP wouldn't want to stay at her house. The friend doesn't sound like a very reasonable person. I wouldn't want to end up spending half my weekend with her.

If this helps I have cancelled meeting a friend in Sheffield which is a mid point for us. We were going by train.
She is elderly and it was our Christmas catch up. She wasn’t thrilled and I wanted to see her, However we care for each other enough to want good things and no harm for each other. We are friends today and that friendship can weather a storm.

No I wouldn't go out if I didn't have to

Currently on the last train out of Wolverhampton to Oxford, all later trains cancelled and our onward train to Parkway cancelled as well

I wouldn’t want to be friends with someone that stroppy. My mate has had to cancel today, not because of the storm.

My friends replied saying
It's only drizzling
And if I don't want to get the train why don't I get the busses (which take over 1 hr 20 each way )

She's also said if I don't go she will be upset
She had planned to go for drinks after
Mentioning leaving at 10pm tonight to head home

I was supposed to be meeting my daughter for lunch today about half way between us, so an hour’s drive on the motorway for both. We’re in a yellow warning area here. Driving on the motorway will be horrendous and accidents or delays very possible, so we’ve cancelled. She’s away for Christmas, so it may be the last time we’ll meet up before New Year so it’s a shame, but not worth the risk of problems. OP, your friend should understand your concerns - if she’s a real friend.

Don't put her comfort over your safety, a friend is someone who understands your concerns and wouldn't want you to feel uncomfortable. Perhaps this years Christmas present is leaving her behind. Stay at home, get cosy and watch some nice films.

So, let her be sad. She'll get over it. Your personal safety is far more important than her hurt feelings.

Thanks everyone
She's just text saying it's not even windy here -I've explained repeatedly it's not hitting till 1 pm
Also if I can't get a taxi at 10pm (which will be £50,il be stranded )

Yes, it's only drizzling now, but it will get nasty later on. High chance your train will be cancelled.

She doesn't sound like much of a friend. She should be thinking of your safety.
Repeat once more, but start with saying that you don't feel safe to get there, or confident that you can get home, so you'll need to reschedule as you need to go and secure everything on your property. If you have offered video chat, etc. and she's still not happy then that's her problem.

No. I’d be worried about getting home.

All bus services are cancelled here until the roads are cleared of debris. My SIL had trouble getting home last night too. No taxis prepared to travel out of the city.

She sounds awful. Just tell her you're not coming and ignore her.

For a really good friend I’d probably ask if I could stay over and she drop me at the nearest station Sunday morning should the Saturday night train be cancelled, providing neither of you have plans first thing that would get in the way, and shove a toothbrush and clean pants in my handbag just in case. But given the way she’s acting about it, honestly I’d just cancel.

Well it's easy for her to say, she's not the one doing the travelling.

There is nothing wrong with prioritising your own interests in this instance. You are concerned about travel and will have no control over public services.

That's a perfectly reasonable response.

Tell her to come to you and go out local to you. She can have the stress of getting home.

I'm supposed to be going to Newcastle tonight for a long planned get together for a friends birthday and I'm stressing about getting home too. 2 people have already cancelled so I will feel crap if I do but if the metro goes off them I'm screwed. I feel your pain.

Sounds like a shit friend

It's just non stop messages
I'm imagining it
The west is getting it
We won't be
Pretty much begging me to go

I'm in the south and we're only under a yellow warning but the strength of the wind and torrential rain has led me to cancel plans with my family today. Largely due to distance and a lot of motorway driving and not having a substantial car. It's not worth the risk. I'm normally unbothered but my gut told me no so I'm listening to it. Plans can be rearranged.

If she's so unbothered about your safety, then tell her to come to you. How selfish of her! We had lovely plans today but it's about common sense and everybody involved agreed it wasn't worth it. She's no friend if she's behaving like this. Don't go.

Just message back saying “hi, I’ve looked at the forecast and too risky so today’s off unfortunately. Gutted. Let’s see if we can get a date in before Christmas. Have a good weekend x”

That’s it. Done. Not up for discussion/manipulation/persuasion. Message Nothing else for today. Don’t check/read her response until tomorrow or Monday. Find something else to do to spend your time and enjoy your day.

Seriously, not meeting a friend for whatever reason shouldn’t cause you stress. I suggest you rethink this friendship and perhaps put some clear boundaries in place - and stick to them. That starts with clear communication and sticking with your decision while remaining polite, friendly, respectful etc