A thread where we give eachother stupid advice

[Axalotl]

My tap is dripping. I've asked DH to fix it because I can't be bothered to work out how. It's been a week and it still isn't done. What shall I do?

😂😂😂😂 I almost wish I had a husband AND a dripping tap so I could do this!

Start from the house you are leaving, and finish at the house you are moving into.

How do I make this mark in my carpet less noticeable?

Colour the rest of your carpet in with a felt pen to match the mark.

@CaptainCabinetsTrappedInCabinets

Use Lynx Africa and a blowtorch.

I can't sleep right now, how can I relax and get myself off to sleep?

Take a bottle of whisky up to the bath and when half drunk hit yerself over the head with bottle, works for me

@quizzywizzy1 think about all the things you haven't ticked off your to do list, if that doesn't work have a cup of coffee and think about all of the embarrassing things you've ever said to people.

@quizzywizzy1
Pounding pounding techno music

I work too much how do I stop?

I work too much how do I stop?

Fake your own death. Or don't fake it, whatever works for you.

Use one as a footstool and send the other one to the shops for gin chocolate.

I dont want another kid. Omg have 1. Your child will be a crackpot if they're an only. Do it even though you don't want too

Set multiple alarms so they know how it feels.

Wrap yourself in duct tape.

I'm addicted to binge watching Grey's Anatomy. How can I stop?

Thanks in advance.

Watch Station 19 instead

I'm addicted to binge watching Grey's Anatomy. How can I stop?

consume vast quantities of crisps, chocolate and booze while watching. Eventually you will have a massive heart attack and discover the characters are not real and can’t save you.

Shag a fat, sweaty doctor.

Err. Thanks.

Be rude back. Talk over them. Send them emails with important points highlighted in red and bold type.

(Can you tell I have a rude team member who thinks they are Mx Perfect? Thankfully they’ve resigned and will be leaving soon. Sadly, they do work hard and their contribution will be missed in that way.)

Delete all the nice messages in their leaving card.

What shall I do this evening?

Tbh most peoplw who know how to pogo are well above 40. It would be an adult thing.

Tbh she got that grandma quirky vibe that just may as well work
Bad advice 🤣

Watch paint dry.

What time should I get up tomorrow

Set your alarm for 2pm snooze it five times. Then reset it for 4pm and don't get out of bed until 4:30pm. Then eat some toast in bed with no plate. It will set you up for the day. 💐