There is, but it will be difficult. When babies cry they expect their needs to be met - that’s what their instinct tell them will happen. When their cries are not responded too appropriately they develop survival strategies of their own and their neurological pathways develop in a different way. So their brains are wired to react differently to situations than they should be. It’s way more complicated that though. I’m not explaining it well.
My daughter was left to cry, so when she came to us at 2.5yrs, she couldn’t stand being wet - even a drop, she rejected me as the mother figure for such a long time, she didn’t trust me to take care of her, she pushed me away…because I would end up rejecting her anyway. She fed until she was sick, then ate again, or would not eat in order to control her environment, On the face of it, I have a very independent little girl, in reality, she’s scared, really scared, worried that I will abandon her. She knows why she’s small, she doesn’t understand why her birth mum couldn’t change for her.
She will have many issues as she goes into teenage hood, but she has the best support for now, we are braced. Her older brother suffered different neglect/abuse - his trauma manifests differently. But we are very aware of how their trauma manifests so we are prepared and kind of understand it. They don’t remember any of what they went through, but there are definite triggers, my son used to meltdown if the car journey was over 10 mins long, His hyper vigilance is off the scale, my daughter can’t be left anywhere alone for any amount of time.
without giving excuses to our children’s birth parents - they really did not know what ‘normal’ looked like, they had their own trauma and didn’t understand how a family should function…they didn’t stand a chance. Some days I’m really angry and I hate them, but I understand the circumstances that they came from, and I can’t hate them….my kids came from them.