Party - do I have to feed people?

[Dawevi]

I'm having a big party for an upcoming big birthday, hiring a venue and getting a band or DJ but that is quite expensive. I was looking at catering prices and realise that it will push the party into a price bracket that I'm really uncomfortable with. I was wondering if a party starts at 8:00 or 8: 30 do I really need to feed people?

If I was really clear on the invitations to eat before you come (I'm not sure how I would word this, suggestions are welcome please) then do you think people would be okay with that?

For previous big birthdays I have catered but things are different financially now.

Alternatively, I wondered about just providing bowls of nibbles on the tables.

What do you think? If you went to a party would you be cross if you had to you eat before you went?

Your party sounds fab. (Can I come?! )

Ignore the people saying it's not a party without food, or otherwise criticising your plans.

Nibbles are absolutely fine - most people will have eaten by 8:30. I certainly wouldn't expect to eat so late.

Just make it clear to people that they should eat first, and it'll be fine.

A band sounds awesome.

I think the problem with asking these kinds of questions on MN is that there are many more people who prefer to spend time at home than party animals - the party animals are too busy pout socialising, so they're not here very often!

Consequently, the site is skewed in favour of home-bodies.

What's a party without food?

Nope. Perhaps in your circles. But my old friends and I came together through a love of music - parties / celebrations often happened in pubs or clubs and went on until the early hours. Food wasn't important to any of us. Not a huge feature of our parties at all.

Can you not do the same and ask people to bring food?

Or, just do snacks? Get lots of family size packs of crisps from aldi, bread sticks, giant hummus pots from Costco etc. Spend like £100/150?

I genuinely think it's weird people think this!

A party is a gathering of people usually to celebrate something.

That could involve food - but equally it could involve music, booze and dancing late into the night, with no food.

That's "nibbles". The OP is considering nibbles.

I have been to loads of parties that offer drinks and dancing and just some crisps and olives. You would expect the drinks to be included though and it might called a “drinks party” or “kitchen disco” or “pub karaoke”, lots of score for parties without serious food offering

are you offering drinks?

The OPs not offering food or drinks.

Yes, but it's not your party.

Personally I'd choose live music over food for my party any day of the week. Plenty of people would IME.

Meeting up and going to a pub/club isn't the same as throwing a party, though.

We went a party last night which just provided a cheese board - a load of supermarket cheese, some grapes, copious amounts of crackers and French bread, and some chutneys. They also put nuts and crisps out - it did the job, would have been comparatively cheap to provide and required little effort. Could something like this work?

I agree. If someone says "Come and join me for birthday drinks at the pub" I think "Lovely" and go buy them a drink.

If someone announces they are having a big party and spends thousands of pounds but provides not one single thing to eat or drink, I would think 😬. I would still go and probably have a good night but I would definitely see the party as a gift the friend was giving herself rather than something she was hosting for the benefit of her guests.

Ok @Dawevi you know what kind of party you want…and you said you don’t mind going a little over your £2k budget so…

What’s your food budget?
How many people are coming?

You mention a figure of £100-£200…is that something you’d be willing to spend?

Depending on numbers I think you could do some substantial nibbles for that, especially if you’re keeping them vegan/vegetarian.

Ignore the people saying it's not a party without food, or otherwise criticising your plans

The OP literally asked if having a party without food was OK! Don't blame people for answering the question!

The food budget is £0

The wine and drinks budget is £0

Zero.

I suppose the advantage of that is it doesn't matter how many people are coming because the budget will still be £0.

When she said 100-200 she literally said 'I also don't think I can feed 70 people on £100-200' so 70 people

We had a birthday party last night and catered for about 40 people. We went to Costco and preordered sandwiches, little rolls, mini wraps, pork pies, profiteroles, muffins, a big cheesecake and only spent £230. The sandwiches had amazing fillings, all of it was lovely.

Also vol au vents

Nibbles (whatever they may be) is food.

I'd put on the invite that I'd spent all the budget on the venue and live band, so in lieu of gifts, you're making it a
'Bring & Share Party' 🎉

I think people will expect food (or a birthday cake at the very least) if you frame it as a party starting at 8:30 but maybe not so much if you frame it as a ‘night out’ and start a bit later.

I think for £200 you can do substantial nibbles…plenty of chips and dips, crudités, olives, falafel and a cheeseboard.

If you’ve got like minded friends coming and you make it clear that’s what’s on offer I think it’s fine.

It sounds like a self indulgent load of nonsense.
You can afford 2k but won't provide food and then people also buy their own drinks!
But it's a party ? A celebration of you so it's ok ?!
Hope you're asking them to spend any gift money on feeding themselves

And for those that have jumped down my thr oat about the food budget or lack thereof, OP does state

“Mines 2k, I can go a very little over it, but not loads and so far catering has been coming out around £700 which is too much.”