Party - do I have to feed people?

[Dawevi]

I'm having a big party for an upcoming big birthday, hiring a venue and getting a band or DJ but that is quite expensive. I was looking at catering prices and realise that it will push the party into a price bracket that I'm really uncomfortable with. I was wondering if a party starts at 8:00 or 8: 30 do I really need to feed people?

If I was really clear on the invitations to eat before you come (I'm not sure how I would word this, suggestions are welcome please) then do you think people would be okay with that?

For previous big birthdays I have catered but things are different financially now.

Alternatively, I wondered about just providing bowls of nibbles on the tables.

What do you think? If you went to a party would you be cross if you had to you eat before you went?

I'd rather food at a party than some wanker who yells over the songs that I could have picked perfectly well off Spotify. Lose the DJ if it's either-or.

My friend hosted a party at a bar venue recently with no food but she’d put on the invite that no food would be served, and sent a text re-iterating that the week before, so everyone knew in advance which I thought was fine.

But I went to another event recently where I expected food and there was none which I thought was bad form. I was starving after 2 hours and couldn’t wait to leave.

As someone said , hire a pub room, call it 'birthday drinks' and not a party and make it clear there will either be no food or only nibbles ( if you can afford that )

I honestly wouldn't care if there was no food as long as I knew to eat before I came. Keep it casual. I honestly don't see the difference between inviting people to the pub for a few drinks and booking a room , to make sure all your friends and family are close to each other for the drinks

If you choose a pub that does food as well, people can order food/snacks at the bar if they are hungry.

If you have budget put some money behind the bar so people can have a drink or two free . After that they can pay for themselves if they want more drink or are hungry
People may not stay for ages but I'd be ok if people just came for a bit

Then again I loathe sorting out big parties as it is so stressful they are not worth that for me .

If u can’t afford a real party don’t have one at all.

This has surprisingly split into two camps:

Hungry introverts only coming for the food

Dancing extroverts only coming for the music and atmosphere!

You need an overwhelming number of extroverts that won’t give a fig for buffets! Some cheese for those that are even noticing their blood sugar (?) and the best band you can afford! The difference between a good and a truly great night does not hang on a jacket potato people!!! 😄

Baa humbug!

Yes I would expect food, sorry. Can't you order a few pizza's and sandwiches platters?

Yes and absolutely go with a drinks party invite! I have been to 100s and never expect to see more than a passing canapé.

8pm is a late start for many people unless they are younger, my suggestion would be to do your own basic food (hit Iceland for cheap stuff) start no later than 7.30pm and if there is a sound system at the venue simply make a playlist on Spotify, asking guests for a track each in advance. People would rather this than a dj who plays whatever they want and isn't responsive to the crowd as they are too cool! An actual band is amazing but are expensive unless you know someone who will play for mates rates. Costco platters is a middle ground for the food

You forgot those who just go for the booze.

I’m a hungry introvert. :)

I honestly can’t believe people are suggesting a 7pm start with a shitty Spotify system and an Iceland buffet over a real live band and a drinks party, it’s not a children’s party or for the over 90 age bracket. The advice is dire.

This is the second thread I’ve seen about party with no food, is it really that common?
To me no food no party , why hire a big venue and band but hold back on the food? Things like mini sliders , ,mini quiches, cheese puffs , and mini cakes and cupcakes are not that pricy.

Yes and those that just want to get as sozzled as possible 🙂

I'd expect some food especially if alcohol is being provided or available to purchase. Cut back on the entertainment and provide a proper party.

Personally, yes I do think to need to provide food. Why hire a venue and DJ if you can't afford to host a proper party?

She can if she’s called it that, with a note that there will be no food.

It's also dire to host people for an event and not even go to the basic courtesy of providing them with something to eat.

My family is Italian and food is important but I don't see it as the only way to get together and celebrate. A drinks party with dancing sounds fun to me and I don't need food or would at least be happy to buy my own snacks if hungry . As I get older I get less enamoured of the whole food is the only valid way to celebrate thing anyway. It always seems to be the women who end up sorting it out. Plus I do think food is important which is why I don't like having a buffet that is thrown together out of crisps and cheap sausages rolls, just because food is 'needed' or otherwise you are not showing the appropriate care/ love for your friends and family

I love good food as much as the next person but if you don't have the energy or time for doing it yourself or the money to pay others, does that mean you can't celebrate with friends? Does a celebration always need food , regardless of the quality of the food ? If yes, that is pretty rigid! I know Italians pretty well and their food culture does end up being quite rigid . Sometimes that is fine but not always

I would befriend someone who has a food truck, ask them to attend but make it clear to guests that they have to pay.

😂I mean God forbid that you actually enjoy food!
It's mean and very poor hosting to not provide your guests with even a canapé at a drinks party.
I'm cringing at the thought of sending out a " no food" invite
For shame!

You’ve obviously all been to better weddings than I have. I’d much rather listen to spotify than your average DJ or wedding band.

I would not expect food at 8.30/9pm, no.

A sausage roll and mini quiche from Costco I would swerve.

A crockpot of chili?At a party in this venue? No. Never. A baked fucking potato?

I don’t really go to parties anymore but the last one I did go to had food, which is a godsend for introverts like myself. I’m sociable and can small talk but after a while I need the refuge of a plate of finger food to hide behind.

I’m not a boozer or a dancer so parties aren’t things I voluntarily go to. I go to be polite (if a snub would seem inappropriate) so yes for me I need something to do (eat) if I’m not drinking or dancing.

I’d expect there to be nibbles at least, not a full of buffet at that time. I don’t think I’ve ever been to a party or event when there hasn’t been at least nibbles; finger sandwiches, crisps, and other snacky bits. Especially if there is booze. You don’t need catering for this.

Exactly.

I have family and friends from all over the world and none of them would ever consider hosting a get-together without at least something to eat. It doesn't have to a full buffet, but you do have to provide something.

I wonder if these are the same people who don't even offer biscuits when they have people over for a coffee.