Why is all MN kids are super clever/talented?

[BlackOrangeFrog]

So, Other People's Kids will do something like...
Be free reader around 8 or 9. But all of MN kids are fluent readers at 5.

OPKs can swim 10m around 7/8 .. MNs? Well they did that at 4 and are now swimming 2k at 7/8

Oh your kid managed to add 8+2 in their head at 6? Well the MN child could do this at 3.

I think a lot of people are lying.

I’d guess that many are not but they do have mothers who are Olympic level braggers.

Thought they were all SEN/Autistic?

My children are brilliant at some things, average at others and pretty awful at other things!!! I think most people like to celebrate what their child is good at and that is it. 2 of my children are tall and skinny but Mumsnet would probably more like to call them scrawny. The other 3 are pretty small and slim! So I think that ish fits mumsnet standards?? But all 5 of my children are also SO different from each other

-My children have also all varied a LOT in their swimming levels and how they coped when they were little does not correlate at all to how skilled they are now that they are a bit older

🤣🤣🤣 I feel spied on. That’s how I came to mumsnet. The IVF boards. Stuck around for the MIL chat when mine became insane when I fell pregnant 🤣🤣🤣

I so wish this was the case. My 4 yo loves swimming and is really confident, but he basically gets time out and has to sit on the side of the pool if he puts his face under whilst waiting for his turn. It makes it sooo boring for him and he's starting to dislike it! He can't swim 5 or 10m or anything close but he will get there, I think this age should be more about having fun and gaining confidence!

i don't get the mn lack of swimming skill set either considering the uk is an island...
i'm in canada and we have water everywhere, so it's very common to learn early (certainly before school starts). by school age they are going as groups to the pool.
but here's the thing my kids "swimming" was nothing fancy no butterfly or dolphin kicks. it developed intuitively from an upright breast stroke as they moved towards balls and floaties, to later on a stronger dog paddle with some bicycling legs to move quicker than the siblings to about age 5 where they were in swim club doing much nicer technique.

he can manage about 3/4 metres without a pool noodle

I read that as needing a pot noodle every few metres.

I think you're more likely to comment if you have something good to say.

For example - my DC said their first word at just seven months old. Is 22 months and can read the numbers 1-10, sound out all phonics and has started learning to write letters.

She's a genius right?! Well maybe, but she also keeps biting/hitting other kids when they don't do what she wants.

I'm probably going to comment on lots of threads about her genius, but less so about her biting 🙄

I remember getting worried at the school gates as a first time mum because there was an epidemic of mums saying how ‘well’ their child was doing and I suddenly realised I should catch up because I wasn’t really paying attention. I couldn’t have cared less what reading grade my DC was or how their phonics were going as long as they were happy…

So when I delved into it a bit more I realised over a few years that ‘doing well’ was all subjective. The proud as punch mums whose average kid was ‘doing well’ just meant that the mums were just relieved at average and no less. Others were competitive and felt that getting through the reading scheme at the speed of light was the key to success. Others felt that sporting prowess was the key to popularity and jeez fair play to them going to swimming baths at 5am every morning or standing on freezing football pitches every Saturday.

The moral though, is that all of those kids found their level. None of that parental bragging and pushiness really added anything. All of those DC did ok and went on to do various things and not a single iota of those grades, gala timings, man of match medals, reading scheme certificates mean much now.

Play the long game and let it wash over you.

Swimming is a big thing

I've only just unclenched slightly since my youngest can swim alone and unsupported

🤣 at pot noodle

Both of my DC were ahead of the majority of the other children when they started primary school. Both of them hated secondary and left at 16. The eldest is now working in Farmfoods after dropping out of college and youngest is studying computing at college and both are much happier.

Being "advanced" brings extra pressure with it, I tried not to put any pressure on my DC but they felt it anyway through the school and followed the best paths for themselves which is what I always encouraged them to do.

I did the same. My mum still boasts about how I was reading chapter books before I started school and how early I was writing. I was pretty much top of every class throughout high school but couldn't cope once I left and went to uni so I dropped out in my first year. I'm now 43 and finally graduated with a Bachelors degree from the OU last week.

It's all swings & roundabouts. DD2 was G&T at school and is exceptionally good at Maths and languages. However, after 3 straight years of gymnastics lessons she could only just about pull off a half decent forward roll.

My kids are average, I'm happy with that! We've had our trials and tribulations and I'm sure we'll have plenty more. But I love them, and they love me . Yes I'd love it if they were academically minded, as I'm sure it makes school easier, I'd love it if they had a bit more confidence and found friendships easier to navigate, because again in makes the social side of school easier. But they're really thoughtful and easy going teens who help out without being asked, they get on really well, and I love spending time with them, and for that I'm supremely grateful.

Nope. For example DS is almost 5, he has been taken swimming at least twice a week at least since he was 1 (COVID stopped it before then), formal swimming lessons at 4 (so around 8 months so far), he can kind of swim about 3 metres, no recognisable stroke, but he's only able to keep himself afloat whilst kicking legs like crazy. He prefers to be under the water fetching weights 🤷‍♀️

If he was a true MN child, he's be swimming 25m by now.

No - it's not amazing. It's good. It's above average. It's impressive for hia age. But it's not amazing (as in OMG that's incredible). Kids all develop at different rates and I think it's silly to be 'amazed' at things like that. Yes my son can do that, but give it 5 years and he may well be bottom of the year at maths or not got any better at swimming. Other kids are playing the piano at his age. There's no way my kid is ready for anything like that... just like I'm not 'amazed' at how good he is at some things, I'm equally not concerned at how bad he is at other things. They're just kids and have a lot of development to do.

Oh and just to add, re the swimming thing - at 4, he was standing on the edge of the pool weeping at every swimming lesson and refusing to go in. So we stopped the lessons. Then within 8 or so months, he was managing 25 metres. This is why I don't go nuts about stuff and be 'amazed' at everything... they change SO quickly. Nothing is static.

Ds1 was never that academic and only liked school for the social side of it. He passed his GCSE's , but only C's and one B grade.
He didn't go to Uni , only college.
He could have done better if he had worked a lot harder, but he actually liked school.

How long did you stop the lessons for?

So sneery.

And .... the point remains that these are EXCEPTIONAL children, not average, yet here you are going "oh it's absolutely normal for a 3 year old to swim 500m, be reading Chaucer and delving into advanced algebra"

And you could give 50 kids the exact same experience as yours z not all of them would accomplish the same feats

Your sample is small, from the same gene pool and anecdotal, so basically... bollocks.

A couple of months I think. I didn't want him not to learn to swim at all, as it's such an important life skill, but he was vetting really distressed by the lessons (he's autistic we later found out and a very anxious child). But then I discovered a local swim class with really small classes which makes parents go in with the kids. And this was perfect for him - he progressed really quickly in the right environement, and worked upto 25 metres within a few months. If we'd persisted in the other class, I bet he'd not be able to swim even a metre (or even get in the water, judging by how things were going!). It was just luck that we found the right class to suit his needs.

That's obviously exceptional, but I think it's good for us to remember that there is a really wide range of 'normal'. And that kids who are superb at one thing may well struggle with something else. Some kids have spikier profiles than others.

Yes and their amazing ability to swim the channel or recite Shakespeare does not necessarily make them likeable or fun or a good friend or empathetic or charming… or any of the other soft skills that society really needs.