Uncle Billy lost his willy

[ThreeLocusts]

Jingle bells, Batman smells/Robin flew away/uncle Billy lost his willy/on the motorway...
(sung to the tune of the Xmas song)

it's one of a handful of rude rhymes my children learned early on in primary school. This was in the Southeast in the 2010s, but a friend who grew up in Manchester in the 1970s said he knew this rhyme too.

I'd just like to get a sense of how widespread and how old it is. Has it been around since the first Batman TV series of the late 50s (I think)? And do you have other examples of disrespectful children's rhymes featuring pop cultural references? Or rude rhymes full stop? I find this one oddly joyful....

Oldsu · Today 02:19

when Shepherds washed their socks by night
all seated round the tub
a bar on sunlight soap came down
and they began to scrub

I wonder how many variations of that there are? We had:

While shepherds washed their socks by night
All eating fish and chips
The Angel of the Lord came down
And fined the 3 & 6

(Alternatively: While shepherds felt their cocks by night)

While shepherds washed their socks by night
All watching ITV
The Angel of the Lord came down
And switched to BBC.

...The batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker got away! Ha! version for me in the 80s, West of Scotland.

I also recall this one.
Dan, Dan, the funny wee man,
Washed his face with a frying pan.
He combed his hair with the leg of a chair,
Dan, Dan, the funny wee man.

For the next two, everyone who wanted to play a game put one foot in a circle and the words were said as the caller tapped each foot. Last one in was het/it.

Ingle, angle,
Silver bangle,
You are out.

One, Two.
Sky blue.
Who's it.
Not you!

Dip dip
sky blue
Who’s on
Not you!

Midlands 1970s

MagnoliaTreeBlossom · Today 08:21

Dan, Dan, the funny wee man,
Washed his face with a frying pan.
He combed his hair with the leg of a chair,
Dan, Dan, the funny wee man.

That rings a dim and distant bell...

While shepherds washed their socks by night
All watching ITV
The Angel of the Lord came down
And switched to BBC.

The angel in our version switched to ITV after the shepherds had been watching BBC, which I thought was because it made the angel subversive, ITV being thought of as a bit declassé.

The counting rhyme I knew wasn't as nice as the sky blue ones:

Ip, dip,
Dog shit,
You trod
In it.

Uncle Billy here 90s South West.

I remember a ditty which was to the tune of
'An English country garden'

How many dum.... do be do be doo
In an English country garden ...
Do do be do but I don't have a clue
In an English country garden...

Or something like that ( watching Rivals and the original song came on)

I remember that OP, rhe exact words (London mid 90s) I wonder if Uncle Billy ever found his willy? 😆

An advert for commercial hygiene.

How many hazards can you spot in an English company washroom?
Toilet rolls that disappear, causing untold stress and fear
Soap that skulks on a slimy floor
So you slip and you trip and you bump your rump
In an English company washroom.

Or something like that. It's been a long time.

Ip dip
Bird shit
Who’s out?
Tom Tit

I like the line about the disappearing toilet rolls. I would stress about that... and 'bump your rump'.

Was this rhyme used by your employer or actually on TV?

ColinRobinsonsFart · Today 19:41

I remember a ditty which was to the tune of
'An English country garden'

What do you do
When you wanna go the loo
In an English country garden?
Pull down your pants
And irrigate the plants
In an English country garden...

(Or devastate the ants)

Genuinely on TV.

Got it slightly wrong, it's how many hidden horrors lie in wait, apparently.

Kimberley Clarke bathrooms, according to the internet.