Can being 'gifted' be confused for autism?

[SpinningTops]

My son is 5 and on the waiting list for an autism assessment based on a previous need to routine and big meltdowns!
He seems to have mellowed a lot over the last few months though, he still has his odd ways and speaks a bit like he's a 70 year old man but I wouldn't have pushed for an assessment based on his current behaviour.

I'm wondering if he's just really clever but I realise there might be an overlap. He's definitely got a maths / engineering type of mind.

The thing that's chilled him out is him really getting into chess. He's great at it, beats us all, solves puzzles and anticipates moves. He loves it but not in an obsessive way. It's almost like we've found something to occupy his brain.

I realise chess might go hand in hand with autism but I'm wondering whether I've misjudged things and he's actually just a bit peculiar because he's so bright. He seems to have outgrown the autism traits and now is just a slightly quirky bright boy.

Has anyone been in a similar situation and it so, how did it pan out?

Anyone?

People can be doubly exceptional in that they have special educational needs or are neurodivergent and be exceptionally intelligent.

Are you asking if young gifted children can exist who arent autistic, then yes.

Have you look up the definition of savant? Not saying your child fits this definition, but you can indeed excel in some areas yet be very behind in others.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Savant_syndrome

No, when an assessment for autism is done, they will be looking for things that are nothing at all to do with intelligence.

Based on my experience, no, I don't think "giftedness" typically presents in the same way as autism. Of course, giftedness and autism will coexist in some children, but gifted children who are not autistic are unlikely to display autistic traits, and I think it's unlikely that one would be mistaken for the other.

Whether or not your ds is autistic, I cannot possibly say. He might be gifted and autistic, or he might turn out to be neither. Wait for the assessment and see what they say. And in the meantime, don't worry too much about the labels, just carry on experimenting to see what works for him.

"A bit peculiar"?

Oh definitely autistic then 🤔ffs.

You can absolutely be gifted and also autistic (dual or multiple exceptionality - DME - as @ChimneyPot says).
A diagnosis of autism will only be made if a threshold of impairment is demonstrated in three areas (which I’ve forgotten off the top of my head). You can have traits of autism, but not impairing to an extent that would qualify for a diagnosis.
@SpinningTops if I may, I will DM you details of an online chess club aimed at DME children (it originated from Potential Plus, the charity supporting gifted children) - my DS has been doing it for a few years and loves it.

Gifted and autism are different. They can go alongside each other. Also, autism can present very subtly and it’s often not picked up in a child that age at all.

My DD was very successful in junior chess - a large number of the children she played with were autistic. The two things can co-exist.

Being gifted and being autistic are both forms of neurodivergence but it is rare for someone to be "gifted" and not also autistic or adhd. Gifted is not just clever. Also, some of the things you've described are really common in autism, the "little professor" type of communication is well known and is part of the differences in social communication. Meltdowns and rigidity are also part of it - great to hear his emotional regulation has improved but if he's autistic there will still be lots of examples of social communication differences (not necessarily deficits!), repetitive or rigid behaviours, and sensory sensitivities. It's brilliant he's bright. Neurodivergent people tend to be quirky. ND kids are awesome. If he gets assessed then if he isn't autistic he won't get a diagnosis.

My brother was similar, in that he was exceptionally bright as a young boy. Could be quite rigid in his thinking, often very over stimulated and didn't make friends well. He was often given awards for his maths, made the local news paper for being the youngest in school to know his times tables etc. He was assessed for 'aspergers' as was, but found just to be gifted. As he's aged, and times have moved on my mom has wondered a lot about if he is 'on the spectrum' or just exceptionally clever and so 'thinks differently'. He graduated very well, top of his year from an excellent university butni would say has coasted at work. Nothing really excites him, but he throws himself into his hobbies which he is incredibly detailed and knowledgeable about. He's also in a happy long term relationship.
This says nothing about whether he is autistic, but just to say I know where you are coming from. In our family we also have two non verbal autistic children, wonderful but with severe learning disabilities which mean they will never care for themselves. If my brother is autistic he is completely 'the other end' of the spectrum.
What I would say is having the label of autism can be a blessing and a curse. It can help access support for additional learning needs, and help to put an explanation in place for a child who feels isolated or different. But it can also be a bit of a chain around their neck and be a stigma if they could actually function in school and society quite well without additional support.
The current climate means it takes a long time to get assessments through, so it might be in your interests to see it through. If, like you say, he's no longer displaying a lot of the original traits they may find him not autistic. In which case, no harm done, and you'd be better, like my parents, finding things to engage his mind (as you've said chess clubs etc). Or they might say he does meet the criteria for diagnosis in which case you can get the school etc on board for the support he may, or may not, need as he gets older. Often children with 'high functioning' autism can be okay when younger but struggle through puberty or when masking at school becomes too much. So it would be good to have support in place for him prior to that in case it does occur.

The majority of ‘gifted’ individuals are not autistic. Although gifted is actually considered a neurodiversity in its own right. Likewise, the vast majority of autistic people are not gifted. The two can most definitely coexist, but it’s not as common as is made out in popular culture.

The only way you would be able to tell is to have a formal autism assessment and a formal intelligence test. There is no way we can tell from the information you have given wether he is both, one or the other, or neither.

My husband was called ‘remedial’ by his yr3 teacher (back in the 90s) and has gone on to do amazingly well academically. He also loves chess, loves computer games as a teenager, anything strategic. As an adult he’s very into politics, logic problems, absorbing as much information about a subject he finds interesting. He’s done a PhD, started a business in a very niche area of research and is just doing amazingly now he’s working for himself. He does think he has a touch of autism but only self diagnosed in the last couple of years and it would explain a few things!

No, not really. But someone can be exceptionally intelligent and also autistic.

The speaking like a 70 year old man is pretty funny, perhaps unintentionally.

My DC with autism had an Education Psychologist report that included IQ tests on 6 different types of intelligence, and scores at >99.5th centile on 5 of them (the tests don't have a way to measure any higher than that) and 89th on the 6th. Other people with autism may have a totally different IQ profile. Intelligence and autism are totally independent phenomena.

If your child is highly intelligent and has autism they may appear to "grow out of" autism traits for a few years as they learn observationally what expected behaviour enables them to fit in with their peers (ie "masking"). If this happens they really need you to be on the ball advocating to ensure their additional needs aren't missed because if you decide they are actually fine the chances are that the pressure and stress of masking will gradually grow as the complexity of navigating a neurotypical world grows, and they will have a total breakdown around age 14-16 exploding a bomb at the worst possible time in their education.

There's a theory that giftedness, or very high IQ, is a form of neurodivergence in itself. In order for the brain to function on that level, it inevitably becomes neurologically different compared to someone of low or average intelligence. A lot of the features of high IQ (making unusual connections, hyperfocus, hyperlexia, excellent memory) also overlap with ASD or ADHD. The dopamine pathways when engaging in a special interest means that ND kids can obsessively repeat one activity until they genuinely become exceptionally talented in that field (sports, music, art etc).

On a practical level, it's honestly meaningless. Some parents might be desperate to avoid labels and prefer telling people their child is gifted, not autistic. A huge proportion of gifted kids are actually ND but their higher IQs enable them to mask and cope better so they slip through life undiagnosed. The vast majority of these adults all wish they had been correctly diagnosed and treated. There is no consolation in growing up thinking you were gifted and meant for great things, only to discover much later that you are actually autistic or ADHD. Even those who manage to do both and do become very successful, all welcome the realisation that they were neurodivergent all along.

The only real differentiator might be how many social or MH issues the child experiences in adulthood. One could argue that a very gifted but neurotypical child will grow up with far less social or psychological issues and are generally happy & successful on all fronts. Gifted but neurodivergent children all struggle to some extent with issues like anxiety, executive function, masking in social situations etc. Some cope well and can have relationships, family and careers but they will struggle more with the toll of masking (unexplained aches & pains, autoimmune illness, fatigue etc).

Hi OP, I've literally joined only to comment on this thread! Please, please get in touch with Mensa. They have a wonderful understanding that I've never come across before for truly gifted/double exceptionality kids. While many adults are members, it's kids that they really support so well.

I think given your child's age it might not be a standardised IQ test that he'd take, it'd be some kind of ed psych or other evaluation. Just call them and they'll explain.

In my 20 years as a member I've met so many people like your boy. If is very hard to be understood when a genius level child particularly if doubly exceptional and I know there are great people there who would give great advice. Many, many Mensans are doubly exceptional by the way and so they not fit in (in the nicest possible way). They know the ups and downs of navigating high IQs/exceptionalities and they speak in a very relaxed way about IQ/intelligence in a way that will be a relief for you/him (IQ is such a touchy subject on the whole and it can be very hard discussing with other parents).

I just feel like he'd find a lot of similar minds there and over time make lots of great friends, with lots of chess and other opportunities. Mensa gets a bad rap but ignore that. Membership is reduced if you need it to be (if you do not have enough income to pay the full subscription). I've got no affiliation with them other than being a member and it's made a big happy difference to me (just to be around dual exceptionalities which I happen to be-wish I'd encountered them earlier!).

I have two who are autistic and a son who is exceptionally gifted. Autistic son could read at two, I discovered when he was spelling words with magnetic letters. I didn't know he could read because he didn't talk. At four or five his favourite game was beat the calculator so you'd shout out lists of numbers and functions and he'd try annd beat the calculator to give the answer. They were abilities well outside of his overall functioning though as he had more areas where he was delayed developmentally.
Son who is gifted had similar abilities but he was early with everything so he started speaking at seven months, could hold a conversation at 15 months. Where other son played beat the calculator this son was more interested in pushing his understanding of how numbers worked. Where autistic son read because it was a skill he had it didn't matter what he read that didn't interest him reading the words was his interest, gifted son read to find out what he wanted to know.
I taught gifted son chess at three, by five I could no longer beat him and he played for County. He's an adult now and still loves chess, apparently he's been watching it this afternoon when he text me.
I never had concerns that that son was autistic a couple of teachers asked because of his academic abilities and because he has an eidetic memory so he only has to be present to remember and reproduce later what he saw or heard. His notes from lectures at uni were generally two or three words and the odd instruction "do not remember". He's working his notice currently, he's having to use the last three months to put into writing what he has stored in his memory for handover. He's been there six years in a demanding role and has never picked up a pen he just remembers everything.
At assessment they will be interested in your child's abilities but they will be considering them alongside his overall development it's really comprehensive so your child won't receive a diagnosis in error.

I was considered very gifted as a child, extremely high achiever (national finalist in many different competitions, 100% in some A-Levels, scholarships to some of the best places to study in the world). I think it masked the fact that I was really struggling. I wasn't diagnosed with ADHD and Autism until my 30s when I completely burned out!

I work in engineering. It’s a rare engineer that’s not on the spectrum. Where I currently work we practically shout about our “labels”

My oldest has autism, the youngest is on the line with autism and gifted. (the 'on the line' comment was from the extremely experienced and herself gifted assessor).

This diagram someone gave me helped me understand a bit.

Chess is a great hobby for many children, and being a good player as a child is a marker for general intelligence, but beyond a certain level of competency it's about practice and hard yards. Most grandmasters were not considered "gifted" in other ways when they were young. By all means encourage him (it's something you can do anywhere in the world for the whole of your life), but don't treat it as more than a nice hobby when looking at other aspects of his development.

As for giftedness v autism, there's a certain idea in society that people who enjoy cerebral pursuits must be less good at being around other people, based partly on the fact that we all remember some introverted nerds from our time at school, but I don't think there's any good evidence that more intelligent people are more likely to be autistic.

There is a screening test developed by child psychologists (see here) to get a rough idea of someone's ASD level. You can fill it in on behalf of your child in a couple of minutes. https://psychology-tools.com/test/cast