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Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Tell me about the ones you miss, I miss mine too and here is a safe space.

123 replies

Cadela · 22/07/2024 21:17

I’m having a really down day missing my dad. He died 4 years ago and I’m usually fine but today is one of those fucking hell I can’t days.

I miss him bringing random things to my house that he knew would help. My favourites being endless co2 detectors, fire extinguishers and first aid kits. Touch wood have never had to use/had alarms go off them but I’m better equipped than my local fire station. I hope he sleeps well because of that.

If you are grieving this is a safe space. Tell me about them.

OP posts:
StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 22/07/2024 21:21

I'm sad that my Dad isn't here to see the new Wallace and Gromit at Christmas. We really enjoyed them!

CapitanSandy · 22/07/2024 21:22

Sorry for your loss, your dad sounds great.

Grief really does creep up on you. I miss being loved by my nana, our chats and bringing magazines to read with her. She loved the crosswords and celeb gossip. The most loving lovely lady whose whole life revolved around family.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 22/07/2024 21:22

Oh and PS when I have a day like you're having I listen to an episode of griefcast and it always makes me feel better.

JamSandle · 22/07/2024 21:23

My mum and my ex. Both beautiful warm hearted souls. I miss them dearly.

SevernWonders · 22/07/2024 21:25

Hugs to everyone Flowers

My Dad was a Jeremy Clarkson fan, we recently watched the latest series of Clarkson's Farm - he would have loved it, I felt so sad that he didn't get to see it.

Diversion · 22/07/2024 21:32

I miss my Grandad, he was hilarious. He was one of the first people in the country to have a caravan, they were so rare back then that if you saw another you would wave at them. Caravanning was his life, and before that he had a motorbike and side car which my Mum rode in with the tent and everything packed inside with her and my Grandma riding pillion with him. DIY was limited to filling everything with car body filler or expanding foam and everything was painted in the same turqoise paint to match his Marina including the window frames on the house. He used to make up songs, I would love to post the silly lines but they would be classed as not pc these days, I still giggle when I think about him singing them. He also made up a couple of middle names which he said he had. and would tell everyone that was his real name. When the first McDonalds opened up in our town he asked to go and loved it so much it became a monthly visit. He was a big man with a big heart and I miss him dreadfully ❤

HowIrresponsible · 22/07/2024 21:35

My mum. She passed around 6 months ago. I was ok to start with but now, as time goes on, it is getting worse.

I wish I could see her and take her out for coffee and cake, which she loved to do with me. I walk around the house yelling mum, thinking she'll answer. I think about her all the time. All the time. All the time.

BestIsWest · 22/07/2024 21:36

It’s 4 years since my dad died too (last week). He was a lifelong Labour activist and would have been ecstatic at the election resuIt. I went and put red roses from my garden on his grave the morning after the election.

alahanscornershop · 22/07/2024 21:38

My Dad passed away last year. I had a good sob on Friday night because I just miss him so much. Every now and then it hits me like a bolt that he's gone. I've so much to tell him. Some days I just want one of his hugs.

EG94 · 22/07/2024 21:39

My grandad. Not a day goes past I don’t think of him. I always wonder what would he say, what would he think, what would he tell me? I find comfort in songs and talking about him. Other days I’m so angry he left us but rationally I know it wasn’t his choice. Just miss him soo much and I can always see his hands in my minds eye. Ooh tears as I type 😥

FknOmniShambles · 22/07/2024 21:39

My grandma. She was a retired headteacher, old school, deeply Christian, bloody hard work, totally out of touch with modern life, but at heart a deeply caring and hard working lady. Drove me crackers with her old fashioned views but she would have been so proud of me for achieving the career goal she always said I would. My wedding is also just two weeks away and I'd have loved her to be there. I do miss her.

Saddm · 22/07/2024 21:40

Not dead but a dc that I watched taken away by the police.. If they had died at least I could grieve and talk about them. Haven't seen them for half their life now..
Broke me making that call.

saveforthat · 22/07/2024 21:40

I miss my Mum who died in 1981 when I was 22 and it still feels like yesterday. She was a true cockney and taught me all the slang which you never hear nowadays where I live now but if I ever do, I think of her. We never had much money bit she made me feel so safe and so loved and nobody including partners have ever made me feel as loved again. I hope I have managed to pass that unconditional love onto my son.

Work2live · 22/07/2024 21:42

My grandad. This year it will be 10 years since we said goodbye to him. I still can't believe he's gone. There's so much I wish I could tell him.

And our precious ddog who we lost just before Christmas. I miss everything. The tap tap tap of his feet, the little droplets of water around his bowl, the giddy greetings when we got home after being gone for an hour. I still see him sitting at the top of the stairs most days.

Hugs to those who are grieving, whether you're in the early stages, or years down the line.

oakleaffy · 22/07/2024 21:42

BestIsWest · 22/07/2024 21:36

It’s 4 years since my dad died too (last week). He was a lifelong Labour activist and would have been ecstatic at the election resuIt. I went and put red roses from my garden on his grave the morning after the election.

That’s wonderful!
My Dad too has a red rose 🌹 growing on his grave xx

saveforthat · 22/07/2024 21:42

Saddm · 22/07/2024 21:40

Not dead but a dc that I watched taken away by the police.. If they had died at least I could grieve and talk about them. Haven't seen them for half their life now..
Broke me making that call.

So sorry to hear that @saddm. Wishing you peace.

Emmeline1894 · 22/07/2024 21:43

Great thread OP.

My Dad died earlier this year. I like that you have more equipment than the fire station. I have inherited about 30 spanners and endless gardening equipment. Literally think I must buy something and look in the garage and there it is.

The things he planted in my previously bare garden are blooming for the first time, and each one is a bittersweet moment of remembering. They just keep coming, little reminders and hellos. I’m sad he never saw them bloom. I’m so grateful to have had him, and that he has left me all these reminders. He was a legend.

Isthiscorrect · 22/07/2024 21:43

@Saddm oh my gosh. How awful for you. Just heartbreaking. There is nothing I can say to help you I so wish I could. You are so brave. Brave to have called the police.

I miss my beloved nana. After 30 years it's easier but it still comes upon me sometimes. Breaks my heart to know she never met my son.

CatchHimDerry · 22/07/2024 21:43

My grandad.

I used to sit with him and we’d watch the telly, listen to all his stories of his life down the coal pits.
We’d go out to random places.
I had my own room at his house, even as an adult.
He was my safe space.
Its been almost 9 years and life has never been quite the same

Sorry for all your losses

feellikeanalien · 22/07/2024 21:44

I'm taking DD on holiday to the place I was born. I haven't been there for about 30 years and there is no-one left who I can reminisce with about it. Mum died nearly five years ago and Dad four years ago almost to the day.

My DSis and DB are too young to remember as we left when they were very small. It's going to be very emotional.

Mammyloveswine · 22/07/2024 21:46

My mam.. I spoke to her every day, often multiple times! Itll be 2 years at Christmas and I still just want to ring her and catch up with her!

FireandSound · 22/07/2024 21:46

I miss my mum. She died 8 years ago. i would love to be able to tell her how amazing her granddaughter is and see how proud my mum would be of her. I also miss my cat she died 6 months after my mum. That broke me.

SinisterBumFacedCat · 22/07/2024 21:47

Both my parents. Both still alive in their 60’s. Both lost to dementia.

Disneydatknee88 · 22/07/2024 21:50

I miss my nan terribly. She ignited my passion for baking so every time I bake, I think of her. She died a few years after being diagnosed with alziemers and I was pregnant with my daughter at the time. She was mad as a box of frogs towards the end but somehow everytime I visited She was normal. She remembered I was pregnant. She remembered I was having a girl. She remembered I was giving her the middle name May, just like her middle name. Everytime I beam at something my daughter has done, I think how proud my nan would have been and how much she would have loved and spoiled her if she was around like she did with me.

DeepestDarkestRiver · 22/07/2024 21:50

My mum. Not dead. But she's an alcoholic and now functions like a child. She was beautiful, vivacious, stylish, confident, fun and had such a zest for life - she just glowed. All gone now. I don't see her much as I live in a different country but visited last week. It hurts to see what she's like now, and what she threw away. I have grieved for many years, but now just feel sad.🙁