Why are middle class kids always so sporty, outdoorsy & confident?

[Greensleeves6]

Both from state & private schools. Just an observation. But why?

One Mom who loved babies, no mention of the (1-7) Father(s) but that's suddenly a blue print for all the WC kids.

Mine might not be sporty but he loves the theatre, has even enjoyed the music when I took him to an normal opera, enjoys a vast array of music including classical (last year's teacher played it in class and I listen to it sometimes), read voraciously and had an imagination to match. It's almost like he was parented by engaged adults, not just WC stereotypes.

As pp have already said, it's a mixture of money, time and culture capital. I grew up in a WC family where my parents focus was on paying the mortgage off asap and meeting their bills on time. My middle DB and I had music lessons at the local academy as it was free and my parents saw it as a good extra curricular activity. My eldest DB liked sports but our parents did not think it was worth the time or money to invest in it. My parents had emigrated to the UK from the west indies and we were the only children within their circle of friends and family who did any activities outside school. The done thing to do was go to school, go home to do your homework, sleep until next morning to go to school or Church if it was the weekend.

Whilst I loved my music lessons, I wished I could have done more and fortunately because my DH and I earn a good income (middle-class level), we can afford for our DCs to do various activities. DC1 is very confident and sporty, has piano lessons and will hopefully start singing lessons when they start year 7 (although they've been in both primary school choirs for years and was head Chorister). DC1 also does acrobatic classes (which came about after enjoying dance & gymnastics after school clubs), is a strong swimmer and likes competing in sports tournaments with school (something I would never have had the confidence to do at their age). DC1 used to go to Beavers but it clashed with acrobatics. DC2 is not very sporty (but can swim well thanks to DH teaching both DC) nor confident but has shown an interest in piano and acrobatics from their older sibling so will be starting lessons for both in September. DC2 is also on the waiting list for Beavers.

Both DC are very outdoorsy, which I think stems from having forest school as a big focus activity at nursery and primarily school. Where I grew up in inner city London, there was no such thing as forest school and I only bought my first pair of wellies when I was 30 for a team building event as there was never a requirement for such an item when I was young.

Also forgot to add that my DH taught the DC to ride a bike, which is something my parents never did for me or my DBs because they did not think it was necessary. My DC, particularly DC1, love that they can grab their bikes and cycle to the park with their mates.

Ours aren't sporty but are academic and pretty confident as they are used to succeeding. It may not last...

Rowing is a cheap sport if you live near a rowing club. You don't need any kit (it's provided). Tends to cost about £10 a month. Does depend on the club - we have two near us and one is very snooty (basically, as an adult you need to have rowed at an international level to feel comfortable). The other concentrates on all age and all abilities.

I think safety of being able to let kids play outside is a big one.

@Singlespies - rowing costs between £7-14 a session in our area, depending on the club, but you can use childcare vouchers. DC1 used to go rowing and stopped this spring but a bunch of their friends have now started going rowing so they've decided to start again in September. We'll see how long it lasts this time. If it wasn't for the fact that the rowing clubs were a10 mins walk away from the DC school, I don't think we would have even entertained the idea as we don't drive (or own a car) so all the activities the DC do is either at school or on a bus route close to school or home. DC2 is on the waiting list for rowing, as they can't start until they're 8 years old.

It's a shame state schools can't invest more in their children.

The library is part of a culture that is perceived as completely alien by many.

I worked in a school in a deprived area and hardly any of the kids knew the local library. Some had said they'd seen it but many didn't have a clue. It was very near the school, open and well resourced.

One girl loved to read and was worried about being bored over the summer holidays so I mentioned she could borrow books from the library. She got really upset and said her parents wont take her.

I went to a private girl's school and am none of those things. Dh however went to a top boy's independent and he says it was the making of him.. he's the most confident person in any situation I have ever met, as are his friends from school.

@AngelinaFibres my dm did that. She liked being pregnant and having babies because of all the attention she got.

She lost interest as soon as each of us got to 2.5yrs, old enough to be less cute, more obstinate and have our own views on what we would do.

Then she pretty much abandoned each and had another baby. We are all 3yrs 3mnths apart.

From a Cornish estuary, we don't have posh rowing here, but there's a very strong tradition of pilot gig racing, tons of historic local clubs, and some fierce competition. One of DC's best mate's father has been the World Veteran Champion for yonks. My DC's friend is considered a top oar in the age category. But London friends' kids rowed at international level and they quite enjoy competing down here because the open water skills are different.

There will be some MC kids that will be sporty, outdoorsy and confident and there will be some WC that will be too. Some MC and WC kids will be introverted too.

There will be families that will be in thriving mode where they will have the time, money and means to support their DC with activities and pursuits and there will be those that are in survival mode where they have limited means and the scope is about surviving each day and extracurriculars might not be an option. And there will be those in the middle that are doing their best to provide but it is a tight squeeze when it comes to time and money but they manage. When you have barriers or hurdles in life like health issues, money issues, etc., obviously priorities will be different from those that don't have those issues.

I understand that completely, it's a shame that all children aren't given ample opportunities to try out something different.

I think that where schools, afterschool clubs and all the teenage clubs there used to be around, free or for a very low cost was great.
Because it gave opportunities to those who didn’t have them.

😂

That doesn't happen much anymore, especially since covid😢

Were they actually severely neglected? Or were they just out of the age where they tolerated being dressed up in fancy outfits and you paid close attention because of judging the number of children?
Surely if they were severely neglected school would have had social services involved and they likely would have been removed somewhere along the way..

Watching the Olympics & all the incredible athletes. Most must have had some money behind them initially, driven aspirational parents as well as talent. Many in team gb appear to be middle class

We live on an island, there are about 300 in the UK, several of which are now tourist attractions. To not know about lighthouses would require a child to have never gone to the coast, never watched a TV show featuring a boat (e.g. old Jack's Boat), never read a book about a boat or lighthouse, never talked about the 7 wonders of the ancient world, and learnt nothing about their own country.

They aren't

@JaninaDuszejko unfortunately that pretty much describes many children in extremely deprived areas. There are plenty of primary school children who have never read books or been places. I'm a governor at a secondary school and the head said last year that record numbers of children were starting in year 7 never having left our town, making maintaining a good enrichment programme against financial odds necessary.

Introverted is not the opposite of confident,

Yep, I’m an introvert. But I’m very confident and chatty.

Do you mean upper middle class?