Why are middle class kids always so sporty, outdoorsy & confident?

[Greensleeves6]

Both from state & private schools. Just an observation. But why?

OK, yes, silly example but there are lots of kids with a narrow view of the world. Parents can help by not hiding behind screens themselves.

I really don't think not knowing what a lighthouse is means they have an excessively narrow view of the world!

Perhaps you are privileged then. You were able to move to a rural area to give your children a lovely countryside upbringing.

Where I live children don't know what a cow is.

Funnily enough, tennis in our town is £2 for two hours at a very low-key, fun session run by a mix of perfectly normal volunteers (all equipment, and a snack, provided). If we had to try and categorise the volunteers, I'd say they were pretty lower m-c, generally.

Whereas the funny thing about football is that although it might be easy to start off doing/get into (and to play with not much equipment), it's surprisingly hard for kids who didn't play it early on to get into. Neither of my kids were interested in it when younger, but finding opportunities for them to play as older beginners (9/11) is weirdly hard, as all the kids still playing at it are really good at it and take it pretty seriously (as do their dads...)

Not knowing what a cow is and not knowing what a lighthouse is are two completely different things.

I moved from the inner city because I didn't want my children growing up not knowing about a cow. Yes we are very privileged.

OK, yes, silly example but there are lots of kids with a narrow view of the world. Parents can help by not hiding behind screens themselves.

Well exactly, that's what I'm saying.

The lighthouse thing happened last week that's why I referenced it.

Why wouldn’t working class parents read to, and talk to and play games with their children though? Surely that’s just part of being a good parent? I wouldn’t think that’s a class thing, I’m sure there are many good working class parents and many good middle class parents.

I agree. This is why education is so important.

We had zero disposable income when mine were small but I knew to go to the library and read to them.

You knew that from life experience, which is far more likely to be the case for parents coming from a MC upbringing than a WC or in-poverty upbringing. It's not a rule, but is a correlation.

Sometimes once a month we went to a cafe in a park. We sat and talked and sometimes they did colouring.

In cafes now kids are all behind screens watching netflix.

Having screens and a netflix sub costs money than we ever had.

And no, not every kid in the cafe has SEND.

Why wouldn’t working class parents read to, and talk to and play games with their children though? Surely that’s just part of being a good parent? I wouldn’t think that’s a class thing, I’m sure there are many good working class parents and many good middle class parents.

I don't know, i don't ask them. Maybe they have less time. Who knows. But the gap is increasingly apparent.

I mean, it's not difficult to learn about libraries. We have women and children refugees in our town, from Syria, and they use the library!

Agree its money
For kit
2 cars
1 parent not working or not ft to get to clubs
Cost of clubs some are hugely expensive or if not are pretty rubbish so eg swi.mong is only £7 a week but constsntly chsnging teacher and 7 other kids in 1 lane. Not great times to go.
School clubs are cheapish but dont break a sweat
Small house - get less sleep due to noise of others in it
Time and friends to go to the park with

My kids cant
Roller skate or ice skate
Dont like cricket as school dont practose the skills first

If you look at sports day you will see
age in year
Height
Extra curricular activities (so football or netball)

Its similar to academically the MC kids dont ne essarioy start off brighter but the tuition or private schools or readong at home etc make the difference anc they overtake by sats/11+

The overtaking has happened to us
(dc1 very bright preschool, reading fluently by 5 chapter books. Years ahead readong age. Same wth spag exceeding by y3. But by sats most of her class caught up.)
Dc2 was a fast runner, winning by a mile in y1 sports day. Now y4 is halfway down the yeargroup. Where the other kids do expensive out of school activities.
Basically school (as they all do that) makes very little affect on fittness and thats why so many kids by y6 cant even run the sports day distance. Its typical of state schools - set a test but actually not do that work at school (running..)_but take the prode in the achieement of work done out of school

The overtaking early developers is totally normal

I'm sure everyone knows libraries exist. What causes the divide is whether people place value on it.

It's far more likely that a parent brought up being read to and visiting libraries will naturally do the same, as it is normal to them.
It's also more likely that a parent who grew up only reading books at school and visiting the library once or twice a year, or never, will do the same for their children as its normal to them.

I mean, it's not difficult to learn about libraries. We have women and children refugees in our town, from Syria, and they use the library!

Ours has closed down.

They're not always. I come from a middle class background...went to private school. I bloody hated sport and PE! Also not outdoorsy....would rather sit indoors and read a book watch tv

Yes exactly. I don’t think there’s an excuse for not reading to and giving your kids experiences growing up, these things don’t have to cost money. There’s no excuse for a primary school NT child not knowing what a cow is, my DC have never seen a tiger in real life but still know what one is.

And actually loads of working class kids are sporty. They just are more likely to play football than tennis

Ha ha, brilliant!
Its about networking. It's also about exposure to experiences and company of adults, I think, being able to take them to work with us helps. We don't do anything with ours that working class kids couldn't do in terms of affordability, we didn't do private schools, but I guess because of who my dh and I are they have access to opportunities. They both work for everything they have, but because of our contacts getting them weekend jobs was no issue.
My teen goes everywhere with my dh, so follows his lead. He is a member of Young Farmers, so mixes socially with young teens to late 20s. They give him lots of different social and sporting opportunities, networking and training. He is also involved with local shoots, so is on first name terms with the most influential people in the area.
Dd is very quiet. Her friendship group is very much the quiet clever kids from more working class background. She'll thrive when she goes away to uni, which again is an opportunity she'll get that many can't afford.
Genetics and nurture plays a part, if you are clever, sporty, and confident, you are more likely to be successful yourself and produce clever, sporty and confident kids.

😂😂😂

Lots of them present like that, but underneath still have the same self doubts, mental illness and general angst as everyone else.

Because my dog's nanny says so?

Most likely because you don't see the anxious and not outdoorsy ones, probably because they're erm at home? The ones you see, you probably also assume are middle class?
But honestly it's as others have said, not being anxious about basic needs, not having extremely stressed parents etc helps a lot. However, please Google affluent neglect. It exists in heaps in this country.

A lot is about parents having the time and energy to facilitate sport, cultural capital, family activities. I was raised by a WC single mum, who was entirely focused on earning enough money and her own needs. She just didn’t have the headspace to ‘improve’ her children. A stable family, with two parents, who aren’t on the breadline, are able to go for a walk as a family at the weekend. Maybe the parents have the headspace to sign the kids up for football club and then take them every week. You don’t necessarily need to be loaded to do these things but if all your energy is going on other stuff you don’t have much to spare for enrichment.

Not sure what makes your lifestyle a certain class.

I've noticed that the poorer families are the ones with the sporty children! Mine are not interested at all. But some of their friends live in rented flats and their parents spend all their money on sports clubs outside of school - whereas my kids are SO uninterested.

Not sure what class we are to compare in that way, my children are in state school, could afford private school, but don't want to waste money I won't get back. We live off our own money that we invest so sometimes we don't have income so we have "money" but we are careful.

But we don't have "money" like some people around us do who have incomes from being employed - we are not employed.

So there you go. Ha x