Why are middle class kids always so sporty, outdoorsy & confident?

[Greensleeves6]

Both from state & private schools. Just an observation. But why?

My child does ice skating , no idea what class I am - middle if you can change class and it’s based on salary interests etc or very working if it’s based on your parents!

what I find interesting at the ice rink is that there are a lot of what look and sound like very working class parents whose children skate. However, wouldn’t say these are sporty kids as a 30 minute skate lesson a week isn’t sporty it’s more an activity if there’s a difference?

Is tennis middle class?

Our town has council courts, and unlimited access costs £40 a year for a while family.

Yes it is.

Only one of my 5 children is like this, we think it's just down to a mix of genes that has resulted in them being like this rather than our socioeconomic status. Maybe birth order played a part in their confidence too but I do think there is a massive element of that's just the person they are.

From reading replies here I'd say that it is a pretty complex mix of factors that lead to a child being like this.... not helpful I know 😅

Come to think of it, some sports and activities are more popular with certain classes:
WC: darts, snooker, football, Irish dancing, ballroom dancing, gymnastic (?), boxing

MC: rugby, ballet, skiing, tennis, rowing, cricket, horse riding, classical music instruments

What do you want to hear, ‘because they’re better’? 🙄

Also, a One-Post-OP. Froth Inducer.

Middle class parents have the money to find a niche for their child to feel good at, can afford to try multiple sports, afford travel for the right club for their child, for the competitive opportunities where they can learn to fail and recover from failure, to lose and find ways to cope with losing...

Money doesn't buy happiness but it does buy more choice and more opportunities to try different things.

By right club I don't mean fashionable, I mean with a coaching ethos that works for their individual child, focus on the right bit within that sport - so a gymnastics club that has access to men's equipment for a boy, or does Acro or DMT/Tumbling/Team Gym rather than Artistic, or an athletics club that has access to pole vault/high jump kit or indoor winter opportunities.

Also more niche sports like fencing which aren't necessarily available everywhere but can suit some not-traditionally sporty kids and give self belief that they "can" do a sport well having failed horribly at team sports/sports day. With the best will in the world if the nearest club is a 30 minute drive away it requires a decent budget to facilitate ...

You're more likely to see the confident, outgoing kids. The quiet, shy ones are going to be hiding away reading.

Having said that, valuing education and having the option (be it time or money) to try a wider range of things will build confidence.

Yep. That's what this thread is all about.

Where I am sports are fairly accessible and cheap, and concessions made for those of fsm. Lots of kids regardless of class or money do sports. The difference is maybe the type of sport. I'm probably middle class and my dc and their friends do hockey, rugby, swimming (club level), ballet and horse riding. We and several of her friends go skiing every year.

I think it's culture and emphasis on what's important by parents.... expectations really.....rather than money. Plenty of very poor immigrant families put emphasis on sport, reading, study, music and outdoor time with family. They raise sporty, well rounded, accomplished and confident kids with very little resources and often little in the way of family support too. They'll take their kids to the free tennis courts and drill them every Saturday morning, take the kids to the library every day after school, sit with their children every night while they practice piano, and stipulate family time so that family influence dominates over peer influence.

My nieces are like this. But they have a high income family, higher than the average middle class household. They've had a lot of time put into them, lots of travel, loads of activities.and one parent who is very confident and outgoing, so it's in the genes and modelled which I'm sure is a factor.

I think even WC kids could be like this? I'd like to think so, if enough time and energy was put into them. Extremely difficult if it's a one parent breadline situation though.

I think its confirmation bias. There are loads of middle class kids who have high anxiety and are self harming. They are probably indoors.

Sime people possibly also view other children differently too - so kids kicking a ball around the rec or at playing at the skateparc aren't sporty - they might even be causing trouble! But those in a team with a kit are sporty. A kid messing about with his computer to make music isn't musical but one learning violin is. Middle class child speaks to adult and is confident. Working class does it and is cheeky.

Here is something interesting in terms of class & belonging.

So, I have had a traditional middle class upbringing.

I fell in love with & married a very WC man (23 years and still going strong!).
We live in a WC area with a lot of deprived areas around. MN would classify it as very poor town in terms of the demographic.

Now I never had any issues with the town, many of my friends are local.... we are also part of the community in other ways.

Here is the odd thing: 2 DC, one very settled happy large Friendship group in secondary school.

Other DC always struggled with friends early on and was lonely during the later teen years. Now that DC is at uni doing a very middle class course. DC has a large Friendship group and is of course happy.
Both DC are raised the same, they have a happy home and parents that are very routed within the community. Think volunteering at events, spots clubs members....

I personally put it down to intellect, our town didn't offer DC the kind of friends they were seeking from a very early age.
It's DNA , we seek similar people to ourselves.

Notsure where this leaves me with DH...

It's not naive at all. There are extremes of course and it's a fucking tragedy that those families aren't getting the help and support they need, hopefully this new government might help there.

But there are a huge amount of kids not being read to, or even talked to, because of the reliance on screens and because their parents can't be arsed.

Maybe there's nothing wrong with screens per se, but the fact is that the time spent looking at a screen is time NOT spent on talking and asking questions and reading.

I defy even mumsnet to froth that talking costs money and only super privileged parents have the time and education to talk to their children and answer their questions.

Isn't it it obvious? Because their parents value it (it fits with middle class values), and therefore strongly encourage it.
Right from toddlerhood, they are out and about at National Trust type places or local park in their little Joules wellies :)))
For the ones in private school - the schools strongly encourage this also, a huge amount of time dedicated to outdoor sports.

They aren't, it's just those are the ones you notice. There may be a greater proportion due to opportunity, but you won't be seeing the shy retiring indoorsy ones.

Are they? Some of them are; private/grammar schools will have better-funded sports facilities and extracurriculars, so that might be why.

I was raised upper-middle class, finished school relatively recently (2016) and was never sporty. Lots of us weren't.

I'm worried this is just another "why wealthier people are better" thread.

I love love love this Mumsnet idea that all middle class families are healthy, sporty, outgoing and never dysfunctional. It's very classist and also naive.

DP is football obsessed and unsurprisingly our DS is also football obsessed. It's the one sport that seems to encompass all social backgrounds. The kids DS plays with are from a massively diverse families.

Didn’t the BBC once define a new emerging class as the ‘Technical middle class?’

Thats ours. None of them interested in sport or playing it. All interested in computers and gaming.

I think you see all the sporty, outdoorsy kids coz they are outdoors. The pasty middle class kids are at home. You just don’t know they exist. But they do.

Accurately describes my nephews. As does the term 'indoor cats' which they relish 😊

Is the question really why are all sporty confident and outdoorsy kids usually middle class?

Noone said they weren't sometimes dysfunctional - you've added that bit.