Could dd children be taken away

[Ffs2077]

I'm going to try and keep it in a nut shell.

Dd has had long term involvement from social services. It was triggered by DV. It was for around 3.5 years . It went from PLO to child protection. And they closed the case about 5 ish months ago.

There was a dv issue with her current ex . There was a merlin report . Social services made contact told dd she done the right thing etc. He was on bail until 1st July. But have not heard anything dd told me that a social worker has been working with her current ex they are going put things in place to manage his anger and mental health issues . And sw said she can see he wants to put things right and help himself and he realises what he done was wrong. (I don't believe that)

Last I knew Gs school attendance was 66%
School said they were going to have a meeting but when dd approached them on Monday. They said keep bring him in and we will see how it gos so meeting never happened..

But this morning dd has told me she's in so much pain in her chest she can barely move. She's had a heavy cough/cold so think that's why . She took pain killers. Around 8.15 she tells me pain is easing . I tell her I will pay for an uber hoping to get GS into school not to much later than he should be. But yet at 9.50 she's still not orded .

School have told me that because she has recent social services services involvement . GS can end uo on a CP plan pretty fast. Because of his attendance.

Incase realivent dd has: emotional unstable personality disorder, Ptsd, and bipolar.

I'm absolutely worried sick that her kids could be taken.

No you have misunderstood/most if it is wrong.

I will explain very briefly. Because I feel mentally drained.

There has nut been 4 years of DV . That's when ss became involved dv triggered it . Her ex from back then has Been in prison for a long time.

There's no neglect at homecetc she does quite well in that side of things. I would have said if that was an issue.

Her recent encounter with DV is recent and as fat as I knlw she's done what professionals have told her to do . And professionals are working with him.

But i also take on board I may mot knkw the whole truth around the ss side of it abd if she's being completely honest.

Do you think your daughter could been assaulted by this ex partner and that's why she's not getting the DS to school todayl?

I don't have the money to do that .

No she has taken gs to school but she took him late .

This.
Some women are so enmeshed with violent partners and possibly drug use &c that the children come a very poor second compared to the woman’s need for the violent man.

Social services hopefully will be involved again for your poor grandchild’s wellbeing.

66% attendance IS neglect.

I do understand what you are saying here, @Ffs2077, but the stark fact is that your dd is currently not capable of getting her child to school reliably, and so your grandchild’s need for an education must take priority over your fear of enabling your dd.

100% they could be removed. She isn't parenting adequately at the moment.

OP your DD is an adult who cannot be forced to engage with the support. If this continues, the DC can, and probably should, be taken from her. The DC need to be the priority, I understand that you have your own children, but I really would think about her DC living with you. 66% attendance is appalling and if it continues, it will ruin his life.

What is a current ex?

It really is. That can't just exist in isolation. If she's not meeting his need for education, what else is she missing out on

I was gonna respond... but I have enough going on.. so I won't

It sounds like a very distressing situation. Your DGS has been affected by domestic violence even if he didn't witness it directly. It sounds as though your DD is really not coping with the reality of parenthood. 66% school attendance is shocking.

I assume you are disabled, as you mentioned that you are not working. Would you be able to step in and provide care for your DGS? He needs someone who will consistently provide a stable home life. That poor child.

If your dd is managing to care for the child properly at home, what is the reason for failing to get him to school so often?

@timetorefresh i agree. It's highly unlikely that home life is 'good enough' if attendance is only 66%

It suggests chaotic organisation which can affect meal times, the state of the house, hygiene, appropriate stimulation etc.

Most cases are thought to come from an unstable childhood. But it's not definitive so please keep this in mind.

OP, does your grandson want to go to school, or is there an element of school avoidance for him?

If the LEA organised and funded transport for him, would he manage that do you think?

It can be - and in this case likely is - but not always.

Yes your DD should be taking him to school and I can understand you want her to do it, but she’s not going to do it and 66% attendance is shocking. It’s your grandson who is going to suffer. If you can take him then please take him.

What does he do all day? She can’t be doing much parenting. Surely it would be easier for her to drop him at school than entertain him all day (unless he’s just left to do what he wants).

If he’s taken away from her then it really is in his best interest.

66% attendance is shocking. Unless severely ill she could have got him in. The focus needs to be on the children.

Sorry if I have missed this, but does your dd have one child or more? What age is her son during this time of 66 % attendance?

Op offered to pay for an Uber- her daughter couldn’t even be arsed to get her own child to the front door.

At least a foster placement will ensure he is clean , fed and taken and picked up from school.

gently, op, this is missing the point a little. Your dd is an adult and sometimes it’s true you can’t help people. But your grandchild is a child and they cannot help themselves. It’s not enabling your dd so much as caring for your grandchild. Would you take them in if social services did take them off her? Might taking grandchild to school a few days a week make the difference?

He is clean and fed thank you ... please show me where I said hes not cle and fed.