What is the best excuse a friend has given you for not meeting up? I have a doozy.W

[CharlotteRumpling]

I have a friend who has told me she can't meet for a while because her 22 year old daughter has just started a Keto diet, and she needs to be at home to cook for her!

I feel slightly insulted that she could not come up with a better excuse not to meet! 😋

One of DH’s friends text the morning of our wedding to say he couldn’t attend any more as he had to help his boss prepare for a meeting the following week.

He’s not DH’s friend any more, funnily enough.

My best one was I once had a flakey friend ... often we'd agree to meet up but her timekeeping was terrible.

On one occasion we agreed to meet at 2pm, so she'd collect me from home and we'd drive into town to do some shopping. She turned up at 3.30 - her excuse for being late was ...

... she decided she needed to have an impromptu session with her dildo and bring herself off.

A friend once cancelled the morning of a meet up because 'her mum and step-dad might be breaking up'.

'I have my hand stuck inside a frozen chicken.'

I was young. It was true. It hurt. My friend came to me instead.

1pm one Saturday the weather was nice and we decided to have a BBQ, I texted a couple of friends and invited them and their kids. Most turned up within 2/3 hours except my best friend and her son who turned up at 8pm when others were leaving. She'd decided to a have a nap first 🤷‍♀️

@boombang Did the fix guy leave school and become a priest by any chance? 😉

Just to add, I was a sixth former not the tutor.

Fox not fix.

She didn't cancel but I usually visit sil, she barely ever comes to me. A rare occasion we were meeting a 20 min from my house and 40 minutes from hers. She rang and suggested a place 5 min from her house and 50 min from min as "it was a bit far to travel"

I explained I'd booked so she reluctantly agreed to come , she brought her dh (fine I guess but my dh, her brother didn't come) because they had traveled so far they decided to do some shopping and make a day of it. 40 minutes!!

Not someone who let me down personally, but I have a friend whose son got married, and his own brother did not show up for the wedding as he was looking after a baby bird that his cat had caught. It died anyway.

One example for me... I was due to meet a friend in our local town centre, and because there was no spaces in the residential areas, she turned around and went home. Plenty of cheap car parks where I live. She left me waiting in a cafe and text me when she got home.

I had a friend who would often say 'I double booked myself' which clearly meant that she'd found something else she'd prefer to do than meet me.

At a previous job, someone rang in to say they wouldn’t be in as they had no ironed shirts to wear…

The MD rang him back and said A) there is no dress code and B) if he wasn’t in soon he would no longer be required to come in at all.

A colleague once rang in sick with the excuse that he had “sweaty legs.”

🤣

Cat's nap time! Even better. I'll never be able to meet anyone for anything 😉

My mum makes a big deal and uses as an excuse to not do things/ leave what she is doing that she has to make her boyfriend dinner as if he's not a 50 yeah old man who can't cook for himself. He also lived alone for 20+ years. God knows how he survived

I would always praise brutal honestly of this nature! My bff and I have always had a strong bond over feeling totally relaxed cancelling on one another and regularly send texts saying "let's not bother I cba". It's never an issue either way and I adore her for it.

One of my closest friends from university, declined an invite to my wedding because her (very recent) boyfriends mum would be upset she used a rare Saturday off

Didn't take long to drift apart after that.

Same.
Sometimes, either myself or DP lack the spoons to meet... and we are honest about it. Same with a lot of my friends too. None of this having a headache crap. Many times, we are both relived we cancelled.

Hahahhahahaha brilliant.

I did arrange to meet a friend for lunch one day, I worked in central London and she lived in Kent. I told her I could only be out for an hour.

15 mins after she was due to arrive, I called her and she broke the news to me that she’d decided to DRIVE into central London on a weekday and had only left 30 minutes prior to when we were due to meet because she thought as it was outside rush hour ‘it would be quiet’.

I asked why on earth she hadn’t got the train and she told me she was too scared of public transport. I suggested that she turn around and go home.

My Auntie on my dad's side of the family has never been that fussed about staying in touch with me...no idea why! Anyway when me and DH got married 8 years ago I messaged her to say we were getting married in the September and would she like to come to the wedding, or just the evening do? She said unfortunately she wouldn't be able to as she was going to a dear friends 60th. I was going to message back to point out I hadn't actually given her the date we were getting married, unless she was going to a 60th that was going on for a whole month?? But then I thought why bother! 🤣

My first boyfriend stood me up ( going back to the 1970s here).
He rang me from a call box a few days later to say that a picture had fallen off his bedroom wall as he slept, hit him on the head and rendered him unconscious for 2 days.
I believed him 🤣🤣

We had very close family members say they couldn't attend our wedding (in the town we all lived) because their adult daughter who didn't live at home was pregnant and due a month after our wedding...