3 month old at Christmas - would you travel 100 mins to stay over with family?

[Pinkcase]

It appears DH and I have somewhat differing views… if you had a 3 month old at Christmas, (born via CS), would you have (or been able to have) travelled 1 hr 45 min to stay over with family at Christmas?

Or, should they come to us rather than we go to them?

Yes I would. But in hindsight I travelled too much to keep too many people happy. Do what you feel comfortable with.

I did, she was 20 days old and we went 8 hours away.
She slept pretty much the whole way.

We did with slightly younger baby plus toddler. Not CS though and fully breastfeeding. Can't remember if we brought the moses basket or borrowed one. Toddler had one bedroom with DH and baby in with me. Trying to host whilst breastfeeding on little sleep probably harder than travelling.

I’m baffled that you think this wouldn’t be doable at 3 months really. It’s really great to get out and about. Things are pretty established by 3 months.

Yes I would and it would have been much more comfortable than hosting. But I appreciate not everyone's parents have the space to make them comfortable when they stay.

Yeah it would be fine - I took an 18 month old and a 2 week old after a CS on a longer journey than that to get a second pair of hands when DH was away on business !

Yes. 3 months is a great time to travel with a baby. Assuming there is adequate space (ie a spare room with space for a travel cot for the baby) and you get on ok with family, it's probably the best time to travel to be honest. Baby will still sleep pretty well in the day whatever you're up to and will be more settled at night than a newborn would, feeding is more likely to be established and no need to worry about solids.

Easier to travel that distance with a 3 month old than do this at 15 months (aka in a year’s time) when there will be a wild toddler refusing to sleep in a strange place.

Also I had two CS and one was complicated with a vascular team on standby and more blood loss than normal. By 3 months I was fine and I am not a fitness freak or anything.

Yes, and we travelled longer than that with 2 older siblings.

I travelled to family 100 miles away when mine was 4 months and I wish I hadn't. It wasn't so bad at the time, but incredibly tiring which we could've done without.

My biggest regret about it is that as we did it with such a young baby it's now set a precedent that'll we'll always be the ones to do the travel to them now they're older.

I travelled 5000 miles alone with an 10 week old on a transatlantic flight, so yes, a two hour journey and Christmas with family wouldn't have been an issue.

I wouldn't want to host with a 3 month old. I'd rather visit and ask hubby to drive.

Are you already thinking about Xmas? See how you both feel when DB is a month old, and concentrate on looking forward to their arrival, not Xmas.

Yes, it wouldn't be a problem.

No one goes anywhere. Unless they are bringing me food and going away again.

My first baby was 3.5 months at Christmas time. I had a c section. I was still recovering after having SPD. Mine slept pretty well (lots don’t!). It was lockdown so we had a bubble with my DBIL and no one else came. He cooked along with DH. I drank wine, made sure baby stayed on track with naps and it was lovely.

Last Christmas baby 2 was 5.5 months old. Family came to us. BIL and DH cooked, I drank wine, made sure baby stayed on track with naps. It was lovely. We’ve decided to make that a tradition.

If someone had suggested I pack up my small baby and travel for 100 minutes to someone else’s house with none of my stuff, or that I cook for everyone I would definitely have declined (while laughing my head off about this silly suggestion). It’s hard enough with a small baby!

EDIT also at that age you are supposed to limit the amount of time baby spends in a car seat. Factor in a decent length stop every 30 mins.

C section won't make a difference at 3 months for most. Nor will the 2 hour journey, baby will likely sleep. Issue for me would be just how much stuff to take if staying! We had to buy a much bigger car to be able to travel and stay. Crib (including spare sheets etc), pram with the bassinet or seat (mine had outgrown bassinet at that point), if you're breastfeeding not so bad but if bottle you'll need formula, bottles, prep machine if you use one, cleaning/ sterilising stuff. Clothes, nappies, Creams, baby bath. It adds up!

So yes, I'd travel to see people if I didn't want to host, but for the sake of 1.5-2 hours in the car, tbh I would rather drive there and back rather than stay and have to pack so much up!

Yes of course you can do it and it wouldn't be difficult. But if you want to host and or at her they come to you then do it. After having kids we did have 1 year where we travelled, then we had a year of hosting, then covid hit after 2nd baby and now we do our own thing. We are happy if anyone wants to visit us but we stay home with the kids now and find most of our family are happy to do the same rather than drive the 1hr 30 to us. We have a big catch up Boxing Day instead

100 minutes? That's nothing. We did that a few times after 8 weeks. We flew to a different country to meet family at 12 weeks. It's just a bit of packing, I honestly can't see why anyone would have an issue with it unless you have a sickly child. Don't think having a baby means you are housebound. You just get on with it and bring them with you.

Of course I would.
How lovely to be surrounded by family and not having to host.
Traveling less than two hours to then be looked after, and hosted would be FAR nicer than having to cook, clean, change beds, shop, organise, and generally look after two other couples with a 3 month old.

Yes. No question.

@FlyingHighFlyingLow but you don't need those things for 1 or two nights. Baby can sleep in the pram just bring a blanket. If you are formula feeding you can sterilise with a few sterilising tablets, two or three bottles in rotation, a cleaning brush and a packet of formula. No need for a bath, baby can go without for one night or be dunked in a tub if needed. A few changes of clothes, a packet of nappies and wipes. If space is very tight ask the host to buy nappies wipes and formula in advance. Babies are tiny portable things, they really don't need all that stuff.

Well I flew to Spain with my baby at 8 weeks, so absolutely. Also a CS, but not sure why that's relevant.

Yes 1.45hr isn't long at all

A 90 minute drive?! Wouldn't even blink.