Revenge - what’s your experience?

[Getitgirl]

I’m a great believer that living well is the best revenge. But I wonder sometimes how it would feel to carry out an act of pure revenge - would it make you feel better about the person who wronged you? Did it bring any temporary relief and was there regret?

I’d love to hear of anyone’s experience of doing this - from the petty to the properly vengeful!

for context, a man who ghosted me two years ago keeps cropping up on the apps and ‘liking’ my profile. I ignore every time - even the fact he’s lying about his age every time every time he appears. Whilst tempting to let rip, I sense the relief would be short-lived.

over to you

😂

weird. 3 coffee dates with someone as a way of getting revenge on them 🤷

😂

Not my revenge but my Mum’s best friend, who was left with loads of debt when her husband left her for a very young girl, taking their sports car with him. She was working full time but took on office cleaning jobs morning and evening in order to pay off the debts. One evening she was walking home when they drove past her. She went home, set the alarm for 3am, then got up and dressed all in black, took her car key and some secateurs, opened the bonnet on the sports car and cut every wire she could find, then locked the car and went back and had the best sleep she had had since the split.
The next day he phoned her, apoplectic with rage, and she said “I don’t know what you’re talking about, I am working 3 jobs to pay off your debts. When the hell do you think I’d have the time or the energy to do that? You had better start thinking about who else you have made an enemy of “.
Years later she received a letter from a solicitor asking her if she’d be willing to sell back the shares his parents had given her for a wedding present. She arranged to meet him in London at the solicitor’s office. She took out a new credit card and had her hair make up and nails done, and bought an expensive outfit. He (by now married to the other woman) was very complimentary about her appearance, and when she said she would give back her shares he insisted on taking her for lunch as a thank you. The lunch, in a very expensive hotel, turned into tea and then dinner and then he asked her if he could take her to Paris for a weekend. She asked him what about his wife and he said “Oh, we have an open marriage “ She said “I suppose that’s what you told her about us .No thanks, you obviously haven’t changed. I hope you don’t have to take on more jobs to pay for today “ and she walked out.

My revenge was seeing how badly his life had turned out.
Plus having the joy of telling him that there was no way I'd get back with him.

Why are you being obtuse about this?

baffled to have wasted your tine3x! once, yeah i kind of see that. But 3x to find out about him? Just strikes me as a total waste of your time! each to their own

Not huge horrid revenge but dh “forgot” about a Mother’s Day gift from our little children for me and rushed out and bought a crap box of chocolates from the garage, I wasn’t best pleased about the lack of effort and he said I was being ungrateful so I kept them and he got the same box of chocolates back on Fathers Day ( I normally make a huge effort with gifts) he wasn’t best pleased but since then has always made a huge effort for gifts!

we still laugh about it now!

@Euro24 you won’t win with that poster. They have been obtuse/overly invested at people on this thread and consider our behaviour ‘weird’ whichever way we explain it. You have to feel sorry for them.

plus I think you handled that perfectly 😌

This is incredible 😜 your 9-yo self was a total badass

This is the best one!

Thanks. He's incredibly stupid, too. Told me in forensic detail about his relationship with the mother of his kid on our first meet up!
How she had an affair with his best friend- I don't condone affairs but he had it coming, massive cocklodgery about how his mum made his life 'miserable' by wanting his grown ass to move out and he needed somewhere to live so suddenly the single mum he'd only been a fwb with became the love of his life , how he was going to break up with her but she got pregnant, how he had to go on Viagra, blah blah.

What a clown.

I'm glad he got a shitty life.

I don't care if this makes me a bitch, this is a thread about revenge not more higher pursuits.

I'm sure there's other threads people can be nice on.

I will never ever forget how he pointed to this young girl and coldly announced that he was trading me in for her. That at one stone overweight I'd become grossly obese. Funnily enough, the mother of his child was about 6 stone overweight.
I don't judge her for this but I do him and his 'standards' which he obviously couldn't maintain.

Of course, he did not trade me in for the pretty young girl he pointed at after all.

He could of course just been decent all those years ago and said he didn't feel things were working out. You know like a half decent human being.

I despise him.

I think revenge of any sort, even if "successful",
leaves you a bit deflated and a bit disgusted.
It depends on situation.

When I found out about ExH's affair I cancelled the credit card he held in my name without telling him.....I wish I could have seen his face when he and OW rocked up to reception to pay the bill at the swanky hotel he took her to a week later, only to find that his card was declined.

my ''revenge'' wasn't illegal and didn't physically harm anybody or their property but I felt better afterwards. LIke I explained, in a moment where the pain was unbearable (and working through pain by feeling it is a lengthy process) I threw a few sandbags over board. Obviously twenty years later it's easy to say that time heals all and dignity is everything blah blah blah

ha ha, did he mention it. Did he claim his card was rejected at sainsbury's!

I asked him if he had had a good weekend "with the lads". He looked a bit sheepish and said something about the card not working properly and how embarrassed he was that "they" had to bail him out. I just gave him by best "Paddington-hard-stare". That was the moment he knew that I knew.

@crayfishyum

No I didn't stay with him, and he'd done these in the few weeks leading up to the split. He was abusive so my head wasn't exactly straight at the time.

I plotted all sorts of evil revenge when I found out my husband cheated (over twenty years of marriage, and it turned out to be more than one affair) - for about 5 minutes. Then I decided to live my best life, and never speak to him again. Which was going great, until I read some of the cracking stories on here and wish I had done something really Machiavellian now, lol

Is that case you are doing it wrong 😬

I agree that plotting the revenge may be cathartic, but executing it ultimately isn’t. My exh was a total bastard in so many ways , but really living my best life now is the best revenge. He is still bitter ( and the OW gets the brunt of that) whilst I serenely live my life.

Had a nightmare boss, who travels monthly to the USA. I had left the company.

Completely randomly ended up having a great laugh with a friend of a friend of a sibling. Who works for Homeland Security.

Ex-Boss now gets stopped every single time, and has missed flights. Great!

I think it was her way of winding him up …. Love it!

She is being very obtuse …. I agree !!

A friend and I once signed her ex up for a romance book club - do you remember the ones you used to see in the back of magazines? 6 titles for £1 then they send you a book a month until you tell them to stop. I can’t remember what he’d done, and I felt a bit bad afterwards about the admin for the company, but it was highly satisfying at the time.

I kept a horrible exs number on my phone. I know he looks at WhatsApp statuses so I put lots up of me and DH looking amazing in amazing places ex would never take me. I know he's seen them and he's a very jealous person so hahahahhaah