What's your stupidest injury?

[ForQuaintMintCat]

Fell out of bed injured my knee

Jumped off a swinging swing and broke my arm.
Caught my nipple in a ladder when closing the ladder.
Closed a cash register drawer on my nipple
Fell over the strap on my handbag.

In a very similar way I tried to work a blunt-ish scalpel down the side of a rubber bung stuck in a test tube. The tube shattered and I stabbed myself in the palm. Nice clean wound at least, so no stitches and a very neat little scar.

My best stupid injury was achieved as a kid, playing with those flower shaped cake candle holders. Left them by my bed, and later stepped on an upturned one. It went into my heel up to the flower 😬. I started to be more tidy after that...

I ironed my hands
ive got one of those iron press things and straightened the garment I was supposedly ironing
pulled the lever and then placed my hands back on the garment to hold it in place
it was bad
worst part was going into work and telling the others what I’d done
took a long time to live it down

Broke a toe rushing to go through a door
Nearly broke a finger hoovering
Sliced open a finger putting a razor away
Punched myself in the face pulling up the bedcovers
Walked into a wall in the dark (staying away from home for a few nights)
Burned my hand on an oven tray, having just taken it out of the oven I tried to move it
Fallen down the stairs multiple times and pulled various muscles

I'm a bit accident prone!

FWIW my MIL once dislocated a rib putting her bra on.

Many many years ago, when I was a teen, I was in a hurry to shave my legs and took about a 15cm long chunk of skin off my shin. It was deep. I can still feel the pain - boak.

Just remembered another one. I'm blaming pregnancy brain given I was pregnant . I wanted to see if the hob was still hot so I put my hand on it. The whole palm flat on the ring.

It was boiling.

Dropped my keys, bent down to pick them up forgetting I had opened the car door, gave myself a beautiful black eye on the corner of the door🙄

We had an old electric bar fire when I was a kid. For some stupid reason, I took a stick covered in silver paper (I think it was a home made wand for a school production) and decided to poke it though the bars of the fire and touch the heated element. Gave myself a nice electric shock!

Slipped on a wet floor going into a health and safety meeting.

Fell off a stationary horse (I was at the time a semi professional event rider) and broke my wrist, got a concussion. I have absolutely no idea what happened, she didn’t move!

Stabbed myself through the fingernail with a sharp knife while trying to get a mince pie out of the tin.

It hurt quite a lot but it was a nice mince pie.

Not mine - dd jumped on sofa and somehow managed to slice her knee open on the remote control...

Gave myself a split lip rolling over in bed, straight into the wall face first.

Fell over my own trousers and broke my big toe

Shut my car boot on my own head as I didn't move quick enough.
Oh and smacked myself in the face opening the fridge door too violently.

Fell off a stationary bike giving myself concussion, dislocated shoulder and a broken arm

I did exactly the same 2 weeks ago, ended up with a black eye and a great big egg on my forehead…not the first time it’s happened either

Chipped my tooth eating a bit of broccoli, on two different occasions.

Relaxed and dislocated a rib - yes, it's possible and more painful than you can imagine. I literally couldn't move.

one of my colleagues came in with an iron print on his face. he'd decided to test if the iron was hot by pressing it on his cheek. Not sure what his excuse was....

Camping in summer, I got out of bed wearing only thong/G-string knickers and sat on a wasp. Got stung on the bum. Was very painful and swelled up huge. Couldn't sit comfortably for a while!

I shut my head in the car door as was rushing. Had a bruised ear.

Forgot to take a towel to the bathroom. Came out the shower and went to get one (marble floor) did the splits, whacked my elbow on the hall table and pulled the lamp on my head, and got a massive bruise on my arse. All while wet and stark naked.
Moved the towels to a shelf behind the loo after that.

😂

My pen fell on the floor at work. I leant over the plastic arm rest to pick it up and broke a rib. Completely winded myself too. It was agony.