Does every seem to have anxiety now?

[Bondibeechtree]

Is it just me but does everyone seem to have anxiety these days? I don't know if it's just my friends but I'm finding it pretty draining now and then I feel guilty for finding it draining. It's not their fault for having anxiety.

Examples:

1. Friend rang me at 3.45am crying and struggling to breathe with work anxiety. She needs to get signed off but won't as she's too anxious about letting people down. She barely sleeps and isn't coping.
2. Friend #2 messaged last week to say her dog had run away and she'd had to run after her. All fine and caught within a minute. She'd come home and was shaking and was actually sick. My own dog does stuff like this occasionally and I'd barely even see it as an event.

There's loads of other examples but it's got me thinking about whether anxiety is everywhere or whether it's my friends. How can I support them without it draining me and making me feel like things are only a 1 way street?

It’s always been a thing and definitely a predisposition to it can run in families.

Not sure if people are just more open about it or whether there’s been a massive rise in anxiety . There’s definitely a lot of anxiety provoking pressures in society but are we becoming less able to cope, it’s hard to say.

I count myself very lucky that despite my late DM having severe anxiety disorder, I have not been affected. I don’t know why that should be because I’ve hard more than my fair share of horrible shit to deal with. My DB has had panic attacks and is generally anxious. I have no clue why he suffers and I don’t. We are very similar in many ways. I don’t think it’s an easy question to answe as there are so many variables.

Sounds incredibly interesting. What research have you done and what other countries are you referring to in your worldwide study on anxiety trends?

Yes, I know the pandemic started 4 years ago. My DD's MH collapse coincided with it.

It didn't finish 4 years ago though, did it? It finished in terms of disruption to education maybe 2 years ago.
And then some people had to cope with things other than the pandemic in parallel.

Good for you if you coped and are fine now. I was nearly broken by looking after DD, it wouldn't have taken much to tip me over the edge with her.

Think of it like a spring. You can stretch a spring so far and it will close up again. But put too much on it and you can get to the point of no return where it will no longer recover.

Lack of resilience isn't lack of moral fibre. It is having to cope with more than you can bare.

You are more likely to get a prompt for ADHD than extra time.

Yes, everyone has anxiety, it's a natural human emotion.

No, not everyone has an anxiety disorder.

Yes, ASD, ADHD and other ND are talked about more and people have more access to information and diagnosis than before. That is a good thing.

No, the world/life isn't more anxiety provoking than it has ever been, but we now have 24/7 rolling worldwide coverage of everything that could possibly go wrong. That is a bad thing.

See I don’t really understand how the pandemic caused the complete mental health collapse of so many teenagers. The after effects of the pandemic on adolescent mental health seems to be more in line with what I would expect from teens in Gaza or Ukraine. It was a pretty awful time but for most of us nothing more than boring, a little isolating and strange rather than completely traumatising. Hopefully somebody is studying this.

Op I used to think just like you until several events tipped me over the edge and I could no longer just get on with things as I had done previously. Never say never. I hope you don't experience it but for someone who has if your friends are genuine then just be a listening ear. I wouldn't recommend you accept regular calls at 3.45am though...

I guess some people do jump on the band wagon but both your friends sound like they're struggling. Your friend with the dog sounds like they may have had a panic attack.

Yes I agree with this.

I get anxious sometimes and struggle to sleep but that’s entirely normal depending on what is happening day to day. I don’t have an anxiety disorder.

It's the difference between I fell over and I've had a fall. Everyone occasionally feels anxious but some people like to say that they suffer from anxiety.

I doubt anyone (THINKS) they've got anxiety because if you have it you will definitely know you do!
It's not as simple as oh I get a bit more stressed about certain situations.
It's absolutely horrendous it's always there in your mind telling you your weird people are looking at you wonder why you walk/talk like that. It's constant palpitations at the mere thought of getting on public transport.
Always in fear of the next panic attack just waiting for the next as soon as ones ended.
I got diagnosed originally with post natal anxiety, then health anxiety and my latest diagnosis 10 years ago with generalised anxiety disorder.
I'm currently on 200mg of sertraline daily and I've done different therapies.
All I can do is live with it but I can honestly say I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

The news yesterday said ADHD is now the primary reason for 20% of disability benefit claims, is this actually true?

Definitely increasing- probably because the world is becoming increasingly more anxiety inducing...

My DD’s teacher told her she thought she had anxiety age 13 - really unhelpful. Yes she was anxious about something that was totally legitimate to feel anxious about. It’s like people aren’t allowed to feel anything without labelling it and it being an issue. Most people get anxious about stuff but it’s how you deal with it that matters.

I get you. I’m tired of supporting everyone, I just want them to support themselves. I have a sister and numerous friends who have obvious and easy solutions to their ‘anxiety inducing’ problems but don’t want the hassle of implementing those solutions. They prefer to moan to me.

It sounds hard. The real issue is why.

Yes, ASD, ADHD and other ND are talked about more and people have more access to information and diagnosis than before. That is a good thing.

Why are people still having crippling mental health issues despite much better diagnosis, information,EHCP’s counselling, self help, CBT, EMDR, drugs etc. And funding might be an issue but even the people accessing the treatment don’t seem to see any improvement.

I think instilling resilience in children may help to mitigate anxiety during stressful periods in life. Yes, I do know lots of people with anxiety, some have deep rooted reasons, some have a lack of coping mechanisms and for some anxiety can be a symptom of a medical condition.

I assist a lot of people with disability forms/ PIP etc. I don't come across a lot for ADHD but I would say at least 60% of the ones we help with are for anxiety and depression.

Neurodivergence isn't a mental health issue in itself, but can co-present with mental health issues.

I think there is a confusion here between access to information and diagnosis, and access to appropriate, individualised, timely and sustained mental health care.

Absolutely 100% this.

I think the numbers are too great now for that to be realistic or achievable.

We have a rapidly dwindling population of people who work and need little, or any, support to do basic things. They’re currently being crushed under the weight of the dependent population and therefore becoming stretched and anxious themselves. It’s a vicious cycle, it seems to me.

I think the general state of the world contributes to anxiety. It's the knowledge that we are powerless to fix things. There are wars, climate change, political incompetence and a lot of poverty and violence in society.

That was always the case though, except the climate change bit. The world is less violent, less warlike and less full of poverty than it was for much of history. We just feel like it's more because we are more aware of it due to global media and the internet. So you're right - it's too much knowledge that's stressing us out. Information about everything bad that's happening everywhere in the world (instead of just in our village, tribe etc), available 24 hours a day. Having interactions with far too many people, including people we don't know and will never meet. No wonder people are overwhelmed.

But I have those same pressures

Obviously different people react differently to stressors, depending on their genes, upbringing, experiences etc. The more stressful life is in general, the higher the proportion of people are likely to have anxiety. You're lucky to be one of the ones who doesn't.

Forgive my ignorance. Can I ask please, do a lot of them work? If they are able to work, what are the benefits for?

A relative of mine works full time but receives some DLA for anxiety - I don’t really understand why.

Sending you 💐 @LSTMS30555. I’m also diagnosed with GAD and on medication so I understand your description of how awful it is, it’s crippling.

But, I do think that some people mistakenly self-diagnose themselves with anxiety disorders , because they don’t realize how severe and life-changing the disorders really are. They think that a normal level of anxieties/worries=a disorder.

It’s like thinking that you’ve broken a bone when you’ve actually just pulled a muscle, iyswim. Or equating a normal headache with a full-blown migraine.

I hope treatment has significantly improved your life, OP. I’m happy to say that it’s made a big difference to me. 💐

No I don't.

One of my friends may suffer from it in a mild way but I doubt she'd get a medical diagnosis for it.

PIP and DLA are for the extra costs of being disabled. You can work and receive them. They're based on your needs and not ability to work.