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Husband being a twat

69 replies

Orchid09 · 30/01/2024 22:17

Does anyone else’s husband act like a total twat for no reason? My husband just leapt up from the sofa ten mins into an Netflix series exclaiming “this is shit - I’m going to bed” and flounced out the room 😳 I paused the film and said okay, what you meant to say was this is definitely a film I need to watch in my own shall WE go to bed? He laughed and apologised. We go to the bedroom and he starts edging his way in some moronic zombie move to my cat, who he hates and she is scared of him, watching me all the time as I’m watching him in my dressing table mirror? I said WTF are you doing as you know that’s going to freak her out and it’s also annoying me? He then laughed again and came over and tickled me, when I hate to be tickled and as we had been together over 20 years he knows this 🤬 I told him to stop it and he said “oh I’ll just sleep on the sofa then shall I” and I said “do what you want just stop winding me up! It’s bedtime and I’m tired “ Unbelievably he goes to sleep in the sofa. I gave it ten mins then asked him what he was doing and to come to bed, and he says “you’re being a c*nt” I am horrified and so upset by this awful comment it takes all my strength not to overreact. I tell him that’s a disgusting thing to say and he explains he’d not calling me it but he thinks I’m being it. I explain his crazy behaviour is too much for me and he needs to come to bed and stop being an idiot.

im so pissed off with this whole effimg scenario I’m too angry to sleep.

Do you think this is controlling behaviour trying to get a reaction out of me and he’s being a little psycho? Because it’s totally fucked me off.

OP posts:
IncompleteSenten · 30/01/2024 22:21

He's an arse for teasing the cat and tickling you when he knows you hate it and more so for calling you names.

Why didn't you say OK, see you later when he said he was going to bed? Does he make you go to bed same time as him?

Valid8me · 30/01/2024 22:22

You started it, why couldn't he decide that a film/series was shit and go to bed if he wants to? Isn't he allowed to go to bed unless you go too?

Orchid09 · 30/01/2024 22:27

Yes, I suppose you’re both right there. He could have gone to bed. It was just we had decided to watch something together, and we do go to bed at the same time together every night. It unsettled me.

OP posts:

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notknowledgeable · 30/01/2024 22:29

I feel sorry for your cat

ForensicFlossy · 30/01/2024 22:34

Why did you follow him to bed?

Orchid09 · 30/01/2024 22:37

She had one eye open watching him half asleep on the bed….. and they’re both now asleep in the bed together ….and I’m up on the sofa. I think I’m just overtired and grouchy.

OP posts:
Orchid09 · 30/01/2024 22:38

We always go to bed together, routine I guess.

OP posts:
doitwithlove · 30/01/2024 22:39

I would place my pillow in the middle of the bed, star fish and sleep like a baby.

Suggest to him tomorrow, the sofa be his sleeping place for the foreseeable

Orchid09 · 30/01/2024 22:42

😂 Yes perhaps! I probably should have just ignored him going to bed in the first place and watched the series on my tod….. 🤔 next time I will 😎

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 30/01/2024 22:47

Valid8me · 30/01/2024 22:22

You started it, why couldn't he decide that a film/series was shit and go to bed if he wants to? Isn't he allowed to go to bed unless you go too?

This.

MiddleClassProblem · 30/01/2024 22:51

It’s also confusing that you were then tired when you were going to watch a film. It all seems like an odd chain of events tbh.

DancesWithBadgers · 30/01/2024 22:52

Maybe he wanted to go to bed on his own for once. Maybe he was trying to lighten the mood with you? Just find it weird you actually turned off a film and corrected him that no HE wasn’t going to bed you both were, why didn’t you stay up and leave him to it? You both sound like twats honestly and if anyone sounds controlling its you 🤷‍♀️

BitOutOfPractice · 30/01/2024 22:55

You both sound irritable and irritating. Calling you a cunt is a line crossed for me though.

Redshoeblueshoe · 30/01/2024 22:57

Yuck - your cat sleeps in your room

WaveyGodshawk · 30/01/2024 23:01

Ah yeah. The old "I'm not calling you a cunt I'm just saying your acting like one" classic abuser line.
OP regardless of the whole going to bed thing, is this what you want from your life?
And your poor cat is afraid of him. Animals are better judges of character than humans.

Throwawayme · 30/01/2024 23:03

He was a dickhead for calling you a cunt but that's the only part where he was (well) out of order. The "Shall WE go to bed" thing is weird and controlling. If he wants to go to bed then he's allowed to go to bed surely?What happens if one of you is tired and the other isn't?

BirthdayRainbow · 30/01/2024 23:06

Not controlling behaviour. Nothing in your last was him trying to dictate what you do or don't do. He was being a pillock. That's all.

Poor cat.

Meadowflower2023 · 30/01/2024 23:09

He sounds like he's been on the smarties to me. Seems strange all round.

amispeakingintongues · 30/01/2024 23:09

Get some sleep OP it won't seem half as bar in the morning.

Sounds like he actually was trying to lighten the mood in a rather misguided way. Nothing controlling about it.

amispeakingintongues · 30/01/2024 23:10

Bad*

Costacoffeeplease · 30/01/2024 23:10

Yes, poor cat 🙁

Luna42 · 30/01/2024 23:17

He is behaving in a way that upsets you, then he blames you for being upset and plays the victim, oh and calls you a c*.
Sounds very controlling to me, and possibly you need to detach and grey rock when he behaves this way so you don't get drawn in to playing the game.
I would be thinking about whether I want to stay with him.

HalloumiGeller · 30/01/2024 23:49

Pfft whatever, I'd take the opportunity to spread out in the middle of the bed,the idiot lol

Raffington55 · 30/01/2024 23:55

WaveyGodshawk · 30/01/2024 23:01

Ah yeah. The old "I'm not calling you a cunt I'm just saying your acting like one" classic abuser line.
OP regardless of the whole going to bed thing, is this what you want from your life?
And your poor cat is afraid of him. Animals are better judges of character than humans.

Oh for goodness sake - are you advocating immediate divorce over this silly incident where they both got the hump and got angry with each other? 😂

AppleDumplingWithCustard · 31/01/2024 01:09

Redshoeblueshoe · 30/01/2024 22:57

Yuck - your cat sleeps in your room

🙄

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