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Husband being a twat

69 replies

Orchid09 · 30/01/2024 22:17

Does anyone else’s husband act like a total twat for no reason? My husband just leapt up from the sofa ten mins into an Netflix series exclaiming “this is shit - I’m going to bed” and flounced out the room 😳 I paused the film and said okay, what you meant to say was this is definitely a film I need to watch in my own shall WE go to bed? He laughed and apologised. We go to the bedroom and he starts edging his way in some moronic zombie move to my cat, who he hates and she is scared of him, watching me all the time as I’m watching him in my dressing table mirror? I said WTF are you doing as you know that’s going to freak her out and it’s also annoying me? He then laughed again and came over and tickled me, when I hate to be tickled and as we had been together over 20 years he knows this 🤬 I told him to stop it and he said “oh I’ll just sleep on the sofa then shall I” and I said “do what you want just stop winding me up! It’s bedtime and I’m tired “ Unbelievably he goes to sleep in the sofa. I gave it ten mins then asked him what he was doing and to come to bed, and he says “you’re being a c*nt” I am horrified and so upset by this awful comment it takes all my strength not to overreact. I tell him that’s a disgusting thing to say and he explains he’d not calling me it but he thinks I’m being it. I explain his crazy behaviour is too much for me and he needs to come to bed and stop being an idiot.

im so pissed off with this whole effimg scenario I’m too angry to sleep.

Do you think this is controlling behaviour trying to get a reaction out of me and he’s being a little psycho? Because it’s totally fucked me off.

OP posts:
Crunchymum · 31/01/2024 14:18

A grown man hating a family pet and said family pet being afraid of him (as presumably the cat knows the human hates her) is very disturbing.

pasteloblong · 31/01/2024 14:28

You mustn't let him torment your cat. Cats are sensitive animals and constant stress can affect their immune system and predispose them to developing illness. No living thing deserves to be living in a state of stress. The thing you live with might think it's funny, in which case you should start playing an air horn over his head every two hours overnight and see how he likes existing in an enforced state of hyper alertness and stress.

People who torment animals are scum.

Flickersy · 31/01/2024 14:38

Crunchymum · 31/01/2024 14:18

A grown man hating a family pet and said family pet being afraid of him (as presumably the cat knows the human hates her) is very disturbing.

Again, if he and the cat were sleeping in the same bed while OP was stewing on the sofa then a) he can't hate it that much and b) the cat can't be that scared of him.

Interested in this thread?

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Crunchymum · 31/01/2024 14:53

Flickersy · 31/01/2024 14:38

Again, if he and the cat were sleeping in the same bed while OP was stewing on the sofa then a) he can't hate it that much and b) the cat can't be that scared of him.

Fair point

User13579367337 · 31/01/2024 15:27

Flickersy · 31/01/2024 14:38

Again, if he and the cat were sleeping in the same bed while OP was stewing on the sofa then a) he can't hate it that much and b) the cat can't be that scared of him.

Ffs this is an abusive relationship and of course all mn will bang on about is the bloody cat. Yes scaring animals is shitty. But her partner was trying to get away from her and nothing was working, if I thought calling her a cunt and doing ‘zombie actions’ to annoy the cat would get her away from me, I’d be doing an entire scene from the walking dead. As it is she still continued to follow and abuse him

Orchid09 · 31/01/2024 20:01

Thanks for your messages and advice.

On reflection this was a very petty argument and not worthy of NetMums chat forum. However, I did share it with you all as I felt upset at the time.

I do really appreciate all the view points. Nice chilled evening so far!

OP posts:
BirthdayRainbow · 01/02/2024 07:24

NetMums?!?!?

Freakinfraser · 01/02/2024 07:29

Just all so very odd. Why do you go to bed together ? Why couldn’t you stay up, finish your movie and then just go to bed after? You both sound quite odd to me.

IncompleteSenten · 01/02/2024 07:46

Orchid09 · 31/01/2024 20:01

Thanks for your messages and advice.

On reflection this was a very petty argument and not worthy of NetMums chat forum. However, I did share it with you all as I felt upset at the time.

I do really appreciate all the view points. Nice chilled evening so far!

Is that why you came to Mumsnet instead?
Good choice, we're petty as fuck and all about the trivial. 🤣🤣

Orchid09 · 01/02/2024 14:33

I respect everyone's opinions, but you don't know me, and I'm not the person portrayed. I sought support due to challenges with my husband. I appreciate the helpful comments that made me feel supported, but some messages are making me uncomfortable. Deleting this thread now. Thanks.

OP posts:
anothernamitynamenamechange · 01/02/2024 14:38

WaveyGodshawk · 30/01/2024 23:01

Ah yeah. The old "I'm not calling you a cunt I'm just saying your acting like one" classic abuser line.
OP regardless of the whole going to bed thing, is this what you want from your life?
And your poor cat is afraid of him. Animals are better judges of character than humans.

Not that afraid since apparently they are both asleep in the same bed re OPs update.

I don't think the husband is necessarily evil. I don't think the OP is either. I think they just had a stupid petty argument.

cannaecookrisotto · 01/02/2024 15:11

Christ I love it when DP goes to bed before me and I get to watch whatever I like without having to take his viewing into consideration.

It's ok to go to bed at separate times.

He shouldn't tickle you but it's not the end of the world, there's worse things he could have done.

Winding the cat up - again, immature behaviour but couldn't get irate about it.

He shouldn't call you a cunt, but I sometimes call mine an annoying bastard and such like so I wouldn't divorce him for it 🤷🏼‍♀️.

It's all a todo about nothing really.

Freakinfraser · 01/02/2024 15:33

Orchid09 · 01/02/2024 14:33

I respect everyone's opinions, but you don't know me, and I'm not the person portrayed. I sought support due to challenges with my husband. I appreciate the helpful comments that made me feel supported, but some messages are making me uncomfortable. Deleting this thread now. Thanks.

Can you do that? Just delete a thread as you don’t like the answers? I didn’t know that.

Orchid09 · 01/02/2024 16:40

I’m not deleting the thread due to disliking answers but because some replies have been hurtful, labelling me as abusive and a c*nt creating anxiety. This is not who I am or how it went, but without going into great detail about my marriage and the type of person I am, those commentators are going to continue with that line. I wished I hadn’t posted about it. Also, wishing I had left my husband to go to bed alone! Totally appreciate the helpful suggestions and going to reflect on that. Thanks

OP posts:
Cherrysoup · 01/02/2024 17:40

20 years together and you always go to bed at the same time? Crikey.

Gettingbysomehow · 01/02/2024 17:42

I would dump anyone who hates and torments my cat.

MATThew19 · 14/02/2025 22:19

ForensicFlossy · 30/01/2024 22:34

Why did you follow him to bed?

Edited

Oh , bloody hell, men are twats

MATThew19 · 14/02/2025 22:22

I’ve been with my husband for 32 years!! OBH, can’t believe that and he’s a stupid idiot. He listens to a girl who is 22 with so much fluff between her ears before listening to me

MATThew19 · 14/02/2025 22:24

Anyone get that

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