Elevenerifers

[Sharrilanda]

Do you know any?
What’s the best approach to take when it is constant?

Going into the new year, am resolving to not just roll my eyes and keep quiet, but want to say something in the hope that they’ll actually stop.
Or am I asking for miracles here? 😆

Advice please wise MNs!

My husband's best man is one. Told us regularly that he'd met celebrities, had celebrity mates. The pictures always accidentally deleted though.

He's such a grade a bullshitter that I cautioned my husband about making him solo best man. Sure enough, with nothing booked, I had to add all his groomsmen and friends to a Facebook group with ten days to the wedding.

Best man had a complete meltdown, claimed thar he'd booked a stag to Poland, been fleeced by th vendor and lost a thousand pounds (without having mentioned it to anyone...). My daft brush husband said he'd cover it until I pointed out how monumentally stupid that was.

He didn't show up for the wedding and a much lovelier friend was an excellent stand in.

I have a friend who does this. He tells me the same story that I told him last time I saw him. His eyes always flicker from left to right when he's lying. It's so patently!

They never stop, they just get worse. My mother is one. Mostly I roll my eyes, on a few occasions where she's prodded the bear I've snapped that it's not a bloody competition, or that she's being ridiculous. I find it tiring and depressing, but she's done it to me since I was a child so I'm bored now.

I used to work with a woman like this. She had always done it, seen it, had it better but literally everything she said was a lie, then she would forget her lie and say something contradictory to it.
I used to love tripping her up by saying ' really? Only you said blah blah two weeks ago '
Then watch her go red and start blustering.
She stopped speaking when I was around eventually, then left when everyone avoided her.

I had a mate I called Tilly Two-Shits. I had one shit, she had to have two to one up me.

Everything was a competition with her. I had a crap car, yet she didnt even have one. She knew how to parent, she wasnt one, I am. But she somehow tried to turn it into a competition. She would engage in competitive under eating too.

Everything you did, she claimed to do it better.

It was honestly irritating after a while and I'm glad we arent friends anymore.

I've just been reminded of an old colleague I bumped into and she told me she was doing a masters part time. I said no way, me too! and she was most put out, saying mine was "only an ordinary masters" but hers was "a highly critical one". This was before she even asked me what subject mine was 🤣. She took my number and never stopped texting me about masters talk, going to great lengths to demonstrate that hers was of much higher calibre than mine (not true at all!) and how she wouldn't be able to help me because hers was in much more depth than mine and she wouldn't have time. Apart from the fact that I never even asked for help, mine was in STEM and hers was in arts.
We sort of lost touch in year 2 due to COVID and busy lives and she was utterly horrified when we did touch base to discover that I had submitted mine and she was only half way through. She then said she'd been diagnosed (by her tutor) with a whole host of learning disabilities and that was why she was taking longer. So her masters was actually much harder for her than mine was for me, so they weren't really equal at all 😂

Are you certain she died?

A girl at school always had the most extreme version of any childhood illness going round and would always preface her explanation with “you think that’s bad …”. Always elicited great mirth amongst her classmates

My SIL is like this.

We always say "If you've got an elephant, she's got a silk purse to put it in."

If you believe he had "some kind of syndrome" then why the fuck are you taking the piss out of a mentally unwell person?! Also, by you declaring him to be a "twelverifer" is one-upping everyone on this thread, with your example isn't it?!? Makes you one yourself!

My Mum can sometimes be a ninerifer. The worst one though, was Christmas Day 2 years ago when my 23yr old nephew (her GS!) had lost his mum the day before on Christmas eve (Ex-SIL) and despite his grief, came to DM's house for Christmas. Poor lad. My DM said shortly after he arrived "Well I lost my DF when I was 22 you know"

@ShinyPikachu OMG both of those examples are my Mum! Especially the "if I'm still here then!" which really pisses me off and upsets my DC

Because "Walter Mitty Syndrome" isn't an actual mental health issue?

Does this touch a nerve with you?

If I had nieces/nephews I would be asking if you were my sister! It's so hard to deal with it myself but as you've said, it upsets my DC too and it's hard to stop them hearing her say it when it's all the time. I've resorted to "don't listen to your silly gran" quite a lot and I don't like having to say that either.

@HirplesWithHaggis "Some kind of syndrome" doesn't mention Walter Mitty does it?! You've just added that now to fit your narrative 🤣

It's not my narrative, my dear, it's yours. Happy New Year.

@ShinyPikachu I'm both relieved and saddened that my mum is not the only one who says it.
She says it to my nephew as well which realllllly upsets him after he just lost his DM and the fact he has no other family besides us. My DF - his GD died a long time ago and my DM is now his only GP. My DC also have no family on paternal side but thankfully too young to comprehend it beyond "Is grandma dying?" "I don't want grandma to die"
I've asked her to stop and explained in detail why it's upsetting but she just got angry.

Eh? What are you on about?! Are you a bit drunk or something?

Nope, not drunk. You took a throwaway comment and leapt on it, really quite aggressively on a light--hearted thread. Did it touch a nerve for you?

And that in turn reminds me of my baby sister proclaiming loudly during our First Holy Communion ceremony, as the Bishop trotted down the aisle, “who’s the clown in the funny hat?”

Obviously off topic, but the memory made me giggle all over again, so thank you 😂😅🥰

@LonelynSad - I think that's the thing. The kids don't understand when something like that is said and we're the ones that have to sort it out. I think a PP commented on narcissism and there have been other comments through the years from my DM that fit with that, it would take forever and be incredibly outing if I went through all her comments through the years though. Both of her siblings have now passed away which hasn't helped the comments. My sister never gets it like I do either.

Well he's at my house and he says he doesn't know her

I know two brothers who bought houses . One brother counted the circumference of bricks to make sure his house was bigger.

I've known people like this.. I just laugh and think to myself that something is missing in them and they're actually really insecure.

@HirplesWithHaggis It was nothing to do with you! Go away!