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Hostile neighbours

156 replies

Bewilderedallthetine · 24/12/2023 15:56

I am a new member so please go easy on me :) I moved to my new house in May this year. My elderly next door neighbours are forever knocking on my door complaining. The latest bug bear from them are my bins..bin day Wednesdays, I put bin out the front of house at 8.00am, before work and take them in at 5.30 when I get in from work. In the summer it is my clothes drying on the line 8 till 5.30 on nice days..it blocks there veiw they say! We live in a semi detached with small front garden and larger back garden both separated by a fence. I get a grocery shop delivery on a sunday at about 10.30 ish..apparently its too early/noisy!. Anytime me or my son are in the back garden, they complain as we set there dog off barking!..I am so tired of tip- toeing around them its becoming ridiculous! They're old and I suppose are stuck in their ways but its becoming such a big problem for me. They have even had a go at my window cleaner about 'noisily' cleaning the windows.. This is normal every day noise isnt it? I am beginning to doubt myself ( fled from DV to live hear)

OP posts:
Lovelymoon · 27/12/2023 19:31

Bloody hell, the sound like nightmares

Puzzledandpissedoff · 27/12/2023 19:36

They have knocked on my door again! I have ignored it!

Well done, OP - it's the only way, and it'll be even easier to do when your Ring doorbell comes

Of course they may still try to accose you when you go out, but a quick "oh dear" and walking away should soon deal with that

thenightsky · 27/12/2023 20:13

YouRatBastard · 27/12/2023 18:00

next door neighbour) told me I need to brush the water from the rain down my path as it is flooding her garden!

Sounds like you have the same neighbours as Rainypuddles

Exactly what I thought!

grayhairdontcare · 27/12/2023 20:46

"Can you brush the rain off your garden?"
Reply" no but you can if you want"
Then slam the door

" you being in the garden is setting my dog off"
Reply " feel free to take it in your house
Don't engage further

Bewilderedallthetine · 27/12/2023 20:47

Can somebody put the link in for Rainypuddles please?

OP posts:
thenightsky · 27/12/2023 21:07

When the dog barks, go round and complain about the dog barking.

(I can't seem to find the rainydaypuddle threads for some reason)

Bewilderedallthetine · 28/12/2023 08:53

Good morning and thank you for all your help and advice. I am going to knock on their door at about 9.30 this morning. It is a bloody joke now as they knocked again on my door at about 9.15 last night and my child was asleep in bed! (I did not answer the door) I have re-read this thread and I am going to say about harassment etc...I will update you all later on this morning x

OP posts:
FrostyFlo · 28/12/2023 09:02

I'm guessing their previous neighbour living in your house was another elderly person or someone without children ?
They sound like,they are set in their ways and didn't like the change of a new family .
Continue to be pleasant ( for your benefit as much as theirs ) but don't creep about being quiet or stopping your child from enjoying the garden etc .
If they complain just tell them you and your son are not extra noisy and are just enjoying a normal family life like you are sure they and their family did a few years back.

dooneyousmugelf · 28/12/2023 09:08

Bewilderedallthetine · 28/12/2023 08:53

Good morning and thank you for all your help and advice. I am going to knock on their door at about 9.30 this morning. It is a bloody joke now as they knocked again on my door at about 9.15 last night and my child was asleep in bed! (I did not answer the door) I have re-read this thread and I am going to say about harassment etc...I will update you all later on this morning x

Terrible behaviour on their part. It must be so stressful. You're doing the right thing, as I said before firmly issuing a verbal warning covers your back if the situation escalates and you do end up having to have police involvement. My advice upthread is the advice they would give you.

Maddy70 · 28/12/2023 09:08

Just say im at work. You are being ridiculous i can do what I like in my own home. My schedule has nothing to do with you

Repeat

This is what works for me....

Potentialmadcatlady · 28/12/2023 09:19

I had elderly neighbours like this..
‘please don’t put your bins out, it looks messy’
’please don’t cut your grass that way, I prefer it this way’
’why have you planted flowers in your garden’
and on and on and on, constantly complaining…
Until one day I had had enough and said so.. told him that I wasn’t taking it anymore , that in future any perceived issues he had with me he could take up with my solicitor.
Guess what he stopped! Never spoke to me again but that was no loss. He is now dead and his wife ( who had never spoken to me before) and me now have chats when coming into house together..
Bullies need to be stood up too…

theconfidenceofwho · 28/12/2023 09:26

Good luck Op - hope they back off.

peerie · 28/12/2023 09:27

We are right behind you x

DrunkenElephant · 28/12/2023 09:27

You’re doing the right thing OP.

Knocking on your door several times a day is harassment. It’s not ok, this is your safe space and your child’s.

Get them told clearly today.

peerie · 28/12/2023 09:29

There behaviour towards you is ludicrous

Missingmyusername · 28/12/2023 09:29

We have neighbours to one side of us - there’s a significant gap in between, we are detached. They are semi. They’re exactly like this, we are now no contact. It’s nice to be friendly but we just couldn’t do it anymore.
Your neighbours need to move to a detached property in an empty field, as do ours!

mamacorn1 · 28/12/2023 09:32

Sometimes you just have to confront these people. You don’t have to be nasty, but be assertive. “It’s my house and I’ll do what I like, so go away and stop being unreasonable. I will no longer tolerate your nonsense” then do not speak with them again.

StrongasSixpence · 28/12/2023 09:40

Can you write FUCK OFF in nice calligraphy on a little card? Keep it next to the door and just hold it up if they knock on.

Isometimeswonder · 28/12/2023 09:51

Just wanted to say well done for leaving a DV situation.
Please try to stand up to these neighbours so you can enjoy your new life.

taketheleap · 28/12/2023 09:53

Oh wow OP, so glad you're standing up for yourself! It'll get easier every time you do it too.

I think the Ring doorbell will be a game changer. If you choose to answer, you can answer from your phone and decline to open the door. That'll take all the 'fun' out of it for them. They must have nothing else to do but nitpick at you. Confused

NoKateMoss · 28/12/2023 09:54

Right behind you OP! They sound horrific and you deserve a peaceful life for you and your son. Polite but firm, consistently. Good luck!

Tistheseasontobejollytrala · 28/12/2023 10:42

Maybe look at this situation as free assertiveness training. Every thing you do to assert your boundaries makes you stronger. 🤸‍♂️

ChristmasFairyGodmother · 28/12/2023 10:47

What absolute wankers. Being old does not make them nice! Lots of old people are prize jerks and unfortunately you've ended up with exactly that as neighbours.

Honestly I'd take much of the advice on here - ring doorbell, community constable and refusal to engage. I might even blast Iron Maiden at 7am twice a week to remind then to keep their distance.

Incongruance · 28/12/2023 10:53

The rainy puddles threads were all deleted by MN.

Onceuponaheartache · 28/12/2023 10:55

Wow they are batshit!! Good luck at speaking to them. I would perhaps put it in writing also that if they contue to harass you you will take legal advice

My neighbours are a bit older than me. Probably mid 50's. They made several ridiculous complaints when I first moved in...my car being parked outside their house...on road parking and was parked perfectly legally. Too much noise ... funny cos I can hear their TV over mine, their arguing and language is legendary, they are hated in the village because they lie dogs are out 24/7/365 and bark incessantly. They complained that my dog was barking and woke them up on our front yard at 2am...she was miles away at my parents at the time and we were away.

I did as you did and smiled and ignored it until they started harassing me on Facebook. We were out for the day and apparently the dog was going mental. I checked my cameras and the only dogs barking were theirs (I have indoor ones as well as outdoor) so contacted my other neighbour who looked through the window and said dog was out cold and not murmuring. They have a key so took dog into their house.

Batshit neighbour complained all day at me on Facebook and eventually I lost my shit and very publicly pointed out that seeing as my dog wasn't even in my house their accusations were unfounded and when they dealt with the incessant barking of their own bloody dogs that went on all day every day and meant no one could sleep then perhaps I would acknowledge their ridiculous complaints. Until then they could fuck off.

They haven't complained since and half the village backed me up about their dogs.