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Hostile neighbours

156 replies

Bewilderedallthetine · 24/12/2023 15:56

I am a new member so please go easy on me :) I moved to my new house in May this year. My elderly next door neighbours are forever knocking on my door complaining. The latest bug bear from them are my bins..bin day Wednesdays, I put bin out the front of house at 8.00am, before work and take them in at 5.30 when I get in from work. In the summer it is my clothes drying on the line 8 till 5.30 on nice days..it blocks there veiw they say! We live in a semi detached with small front garden and larger back garden both separated by a fence. I get a grocery shop delivery on a sunday at about 10.30 ish..apparently its too early/noisy!. Anytime me or my son are in the back garden, they complain as we set there dog off barking!..I am so tired of tip- toeing around them its becoming ridiculous! They're old and I suppose are stuck in their ways but its becoming such a big problem for me. They have even had a go at my window cleaner about 'noisily' cleaning the windows.. This is normal every day noise isnt it? I am beginning to doubt myself ( fled from DV to live hear)

OP posts:
christmaspawpaws · 27/12/2023 17:18

You shouldn't have to but do you have a male friend or relative that can be visible a bit?

I had similar with my upstairs neighbour, my dad was very much "he's elderly, be nice"
One day my dad was here and he came hammering on the door, I opened it for him to start swearing and shouting at me. Opened the door fully to reveal my dad behind me and his face dropped
He thought I was an easy target because I'm female and alone, and he's tried it with other female neighbours but is as nice as pie to their husbands Hmm

christmaspawpaws · 27/12/2023 17:19

Also you don't have to answer the door to them, or speak to them!

Bewilderedallthetine · 27/12/2023 17:22

They have knocked on my door again! I have ignored it!..my son and I are eating our tea and I am buggered if I am answering the door to them! the rain has stopped. Hopefully my doorbell ring camera thingy will be here tomorrow so I am going to try and get that set up.

OP posts:
TheSnowyOwl · 27/12/2023 17:24

I see a Ring doorbell has already been suggested and yes, they are easy to fix. The next time they call just tell them you find it harassment and are asking them to stop coming round for any reason now as you will no longer be opening the door or communicating with them. Say you are making a list so you can report to the police and point out your new doorbell as evidence. Then close the door and forget about them!

Santaisscouringindeedfornewjob · 27/12/2023 17:27

Get some sprinklers for your garden . Activate them when you see ndn on door bell.. They obviously hate water!

HappyHamsters · 27/12/2023 17:28

They think they are king of the road, ignore, ignore, if you don't answer the door they will probably start putting notes thru the letterbox. The ring will record their knocking, keep it all as evidence. They are bored. Enjoy your evening.

NahHumBrag · 27/12/2023 17:52

‘We live in our house in a very ordinary manner. Nothing we do is out of the ordinary. If you strongly disagree, please contact the noise abatement / anti social behaviour department at the local council. I have kept a dated record of your complaints and if the council believe you have a case regarding my hanging of my washing in my garden, your dog barking when I am in my garden, the return of my bins when I arrive home from work or rain running down my path, then I would be more than happy to furnish said council departments with this. I kindly request that you do not knock on my door, write, text, call or email me again, unless it is an emergency. Happy new year to you’.

And shut the door.

YouRatBastard · 27/12/2023 18:00

next door neighbour) told me I need to brush the water from the rain down my path as it is flooding her garden!

Sounds like you have the same neighbours as Rainypuddles

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 27/12/2023 18:12

You need to get some wind chimes and hide them in your garden. Then deny all knowledge ...... when they start complaining , shrug and say " Wind chimes , Nope . Cannot hear any"......... then close the door .

There was a post years ago where the NDN complained that the posters dog "Looked at her funny" . I bet the dog was practicing his funny looks for weeks .

Ginnnny · 27/12/2023 18:16

They are bullying you! Are they/you council or HA tenants at all? I found my local council really helpful with problematic neighbours but only because they were council tenants.
how do you react when they approach to complain, do you apologise or try and appease them or do you argue back?

LenaLamont · 27/12/2023 18:21

Bewilderedallthetine · 27/12/2023 16:36

Hello everyone and hope you all had a lovely Christmas and boxing day. The madness which are the next door neighbours has started again! Its been raining all day today quite heavily. I had a knock (more like bloody banging) on my door, I answered it and the woman(next door neighbour) told me I need to brush the water from the rain down my path as it is flooding her garden! It just normal rain! I told her this and I am refusing to go out in the middle of a heavy bout of rain and 'brush' it down my path! She has gone in now but her husband is looking over the fence into my garden! Its pouring down and he is getting soaking wet! How am I expected to deal with this nonsense? I have taken your advice and am writing down dates etc...madness!😕

We had this! The deranged bat started ranting at my father when he was house sitting for us.

He said, “This is ridiculous. Your house is further down the slope. Gravity isn’t Lena’s fault.”

She shut up after that.

AlaskaThunderfuckHiiiiiiiii · 27/12/2023 18:24

I’ve got one too OP, she’s not mobile enough to physically come and knock the door but she grabs us every time we’re outside to complain about something, thinks she owns the row I just ignore ignore ignore. If I hear her out the back I go out the front or vice Versa. I say hello if I do happen to come across her and then I just keep on walking

Jandob · 27/12/2023 18:29

Point out that you work and they don't. That it could be worse noise-wise. That their dog is not silent. Put up a higher fence.

Lovetheriff · 27/12/2023 18:31

Op you sound lovely. Really lovely and your home will be wonderful but enjoy asserting your boundary. I would go round tomorrow and state clearly that while you are very happy to be a good neighbour you do not expect them to blame you for the direction of water flow or for making a noise whilst living your life. That you do not do anything antisocial nor do you plan to start to do so which means they have nothing to complain about. That if they continue to call and complain about ordinary life events like deliveries, rain and ordinary household noise that they willbe found to be engaging in harassment - this is illegal. Smile brightly and wish them a good day. Practise this at home before you go. What arses!

Bewilderedallthetine · 27/12/2023 18:40

Thank you, I am planning to do this tomorrow 😊

OP posts:
PoshHorseyBird · 27/12/2023 18:42

Might be worth getting a ring doorbell. Then you can answer them from the comfort of your sofa. Simply tell them 'this ring doorbell is recording everything. If you carry on bothering me like this I will report you for harassment. ' Hopefully that'll be enough to frighten them off. If not, do take legal action against them. They are being ridiculous.

Namemchangeforthispostonly101 · 27/12/2023 18:43

This reply has been withdrawn

The OP has privacy concerns, so we've agreed to take this down now.

dooneyousmugelf · 27/12/2023 18:52
  1. ask them to please never knock at your door again

If this is ignored, 2) verbal warning for them. 'Stop this harassment, I have asked you politely about this before'

  1. if this is again ignored, 'I'm afraid if you come round here again I will seek a non molestation order and contact the police for advice as you will not stop harassing us'
theconfidenceofwho · 27/12/2023 18:54

They sound horrid Op. Agree about the ring doorbell but otherwise I'd simply ignore - wouldn't answer the door & tell them I'm too busy anytime they try to engage.

BOOTS52PollyPrissyPants · 27/12/2023 18:58

Tell them to piss right off as you are only living your life and they are just moaning for the sake of it. Bet they spend all their time by the window just waiting to have a moan. Use your garden and enjoy your life and if they persist report them as they are vile and just horrible. Don't let them bully you and it is not you it is them as bet that is why last neighbours left.

Meadowgrasses · 27/12/2023 18:59

OP - do not follow the advice of the people telling you to tell your neighbours to fuck off or anything even remotely rude or confrontational- that’ll just harden their negative view of you. Much better to go with the approach of breathand focus, allforthelove and Tuva. Another approach is to apologise and do nothing - ‘I’m so sorry that the washing blocks your view, thank you for letting me know’ and continue to hang it out. Or when they approach - head tilt, hand on their arm ‘are you ok? You seem to be struggling at the moment?’ .

Meadowgrasses · 27/12/2023 19:01

Or when they complain about your washing ask to borrow their tumble drier. Start knocking on their door everytime your about to go in the garden.

WonderingWanda · 27/12/2023 19:02

Tell them to fuck off.

HappyHamsters · 27/12/2023 19:15

Obviously you won't tell them to fuck off, you have to declare neighbours disputes so just don't engage in conversations with them, they won't listen. I would possibly answer the door just once and listen to their complaint then ask them not to ever call, ring, text or bother you again.

Danielle9891 · 27/12/2023 19:29

They must be mad or really bored. Both our neighbours are elderly and love hearing my daughter play (she's 2 and loves toddling around the garden.) They say it brings them joy and it's nice to see children outside as you don't see many playing outside anymore.

I'd look into a camera for your back gardens too. They seem like bullies that are obsessed with you. I'd record it all and if it gets worse say you'll report them to the council or police. You should be able to enjoy your home without neighbours causing you stress.

Don't let them spoil your life. If it was me I'd buy my child outdoor toys then go and complain to them if their dogs barked just to be petty.

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