Things I haven’t said out loud this week. Christmas edition

[YorkieTheRabbit]

As requested by @CousinBella
Stop with the drama, stop treating your partner like crap, it’s not his fault.
You’ve had months to sort it out but done nothing. Now it’s Christmas and you’re like a headless chicken.
We’ve listened and advised but the rest is down to you and there’s not a chance we are doing it for you.

You have two amazing children, who are sensible, tolerant and understanding. You have two even more amazing grandchildren who are absolute delight. You missed out on your own children's lives, you are missing out on a the most indescribable love for a grandchild.
You cause one of your children immense heartache and the other indifference, and yet you don't get it.
My heart breaks for your adult children and I'm glad that our grandchildren are protected from your indifference. Their Step-grandad is the winner here, he dotes on them and they love him.
Me - I utterly despise you for the hurt you have caused to our children but am bewildered as to why.
In the end, we will all still be there for you because we are decent people. You however, are a dick.

Please let this be over. I can't bear having to act normal when all I can think about is that you are gone.

1. I invited you over for a few hours before we sit down for lunch, now your plans have moved back, don't think my house is for you to sit in all day.

1. You can see a neatly set table so please don't come and place your things on it. I appreciate you may need somewhere to put stuff down while you visit but find somewhere else or don't come to a house with not enough space for the too many people and think you can adopt any space you see fit!

1. You say you want Christmas to be amazing for the children and remind everyone to be courteous as 'it's Christmas' but forget that when your own moods kick in.

1. I hate your way of doing things, the kids opening all their family presents on Christmas eve annoys me for 2 reasons - 1. We spend the day visiting when we still have our own shit to do and therefore don't get to chill until 11pm and 2. I can't agree with so many presents the day before Christmas, as evidenced by the toy that has now lost its shine due to receiving something similar today.

1. I don't want to be around you anymore than you want to be around me but I can be civil for the sake of the in-laws. Flouncing out because we arrived made you look childish and I'm glad you left because the time was much nicer without you. We both know the real reason you leave is coz DH would rip your head off if you started anything and your 'hardman baller' reputation would be shattered. P.S. I loved spending time with your kids today and their Mum and Stepdad are doing an amazing job with them, a real family. If only you wanted a relationship with them more than you wanted to snort your cash!

Lonely but not alone
Abused and not heard
Sitting in silence, time ticks slowly by
Crying silent tears
Other people with stubborn hearts not willing to put that aside for Christmas day.
It breaks my heart.

You lived a double life for 20 years. You lied to everyone. You destroyed lives. On this occasion though, it is going to be said out loud. The truth is finally about to get an airing.

This is my last Christmas with children who believe. Sob. Drink it in sweetheart.

PLEASE don't die. You are my best friend. In 18m, my Partner's died, my Mother's died. I can't lose you too. Please.

I have done everything I can to help you but you won’t listen.
You are in huge debt but you still keep buying your teenager everything they want. He is a bully who is making you ill.
You are your own worst enemy and won’t help yourself.
In 2024 I will focus on my own family primarily.
I will not be at your beck and call 24/7.

I think the reason my brother is shit at Christmas is all the Coke we pretend we don't know he's doing.

Buy a fucking round you walking 1950s tribute act.

To ExH (who I unwisely agreed could attend Christmas Lunch). There's no point leaving me multiple grumpy voicemails We'll aim to eat mid afternoon as I said. I'm comforting your Autistic 19 y/o who's in bits as his only friend was given a car for Xmas (& Ds thinks he'll never be able to drive).
Your needs do not come 1st. I'd also like to be able to 'plan my day'. I'd like to have been able to work these last 18 yrs whilst I was Ds' Carer & you refused to share those duties. If you want to 'eat Fray Bentos at home' you can.

Again your actions have consequences I hope you realise this now the door was kept closed to you again I don't wish you ill i just wish you understood this is YOUR fault not mine but I really, really don't think you get it

I miss you. I wish you had lived longer, to see your now grown up Granchildren. They do have treasured memories of you and your love of them. I am grateful for the time they had with you.

Christmas just isn't the same without you.

I love you both but I really hate this stupid Christmas farce we put on each year.

no one has a good time, it’s shit, all I want to do is go to bed but I have to sit here watching drivel on TV to please you because ‘it’s Christmas’.

i can’t wait for December to be over.

So predictable. So fucking predictable. I know you better than you know yourself. Your insincerity screams from every word you utter.

I’m so glad you’ve given me a reason to never spend Christmas with you again.

Sorry I used to get cross with you.
We both had faults but who cares now.
I love you and miss you, miss your strong arms and hands, our shared memories, your masculinity, your Scouse accent, your decency. Thanks lammie

I'm not going to lie or downplay it, seeing you all out together having a good time the other day really hurt. This time last year we were all friends but since then you seem to have decided you don't want me as part of your clique. I'm not one of the 'group' and you prefer to gossip about me than talk to me. Outings and get togethers now get arranged on your separate group chat and I'm left to find out about them all on Facebook. Maybe my New Years Resolutions should be to move on and find new friends and leave you all to it.

SIL - Fuck right off. I've had 25 years of your sour shit. Getting arsy about any little thing extra we had as a family. Now you have a bit more money you expect me to get excited about your news when you never did the same for me.
Fuck off. I'd be happy if I never saw you and your partner again.

I am genuinely sorry you felt you didn’t have a chance to get involved in planning christmas for our children.

The time to raise this was not 2pm on Christmas fucking eve having been abroad/away for most of late Nov/early Dec. In fact raising this made me feel my significant efforts to raise our two kids, shop for everyone and cook all the foods everyone most likes are somewhat overlooked. It made me want to scream at you.

Just take the fucking Sudafed I went to the shop for, and shut up!!!!!!

I am sorry if you missed your mum at Christmas. I understand that. But for me, this has been the best Christmas I have had in years.

I do not understand why, having spent significant time with your extended family over the weekend, we now need to do it all again. We all live locally; it’s hardly a once a year event, they bore the pants off me.

What's not cute in your child will be even less cute soon enough but the solution is not to carp on at them relentlessly until they give a robotic response, it just contributes further to the problem

Perhaps stop and think for a minute what it's like when parents and siblings are all dead, and stop ramming your big family Christmas shit down my throat.