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Original poster

Are my kids spoilt/entitled?

277 replies

Appleblum · 05/12/2023 17:48

Several incidents struck me about my kids' behaviour recently. For example:

  • our grocer sold out of their favourite milk and our backup brand from the supermarket was also sold out. I bought supermarket own brand milk and they refused it after trying as it 'tastes like vomit'. The milk was left untouched and both kids went without milk for 2 days before I restocked with their regular brand.
  • they ask for home made packed lunches everyday as they don't like school food. If I'm unable to do a packed lunch they'll begrudgingly eat school food for a day but will whine about it once they're home, or choose to go hungry until I pick them up.
  • on holiday in Venice they were very happy on the private water taxi but didn't like the crowded water buses. They pulled faces until I gave them a strict talking to.

DH doesn't think it's an issue as their behaviour does not negatively affect other people, and he feels that it means they just have high standards for themselves (they like nice food and the taxi is definitely more comfortable). I agree with him to an extent but also feel abit uneasy. I don't want them to turn into brats! They are 7 and 8, should I be worried?

OP posts:
Blondebutnotlegally · 05/12/2023 21:35

I'd be more concerned at their lack of resilience than anything

Remmy123 · 05/12/2023 21:36

My kids arnt spoilt but are set in thier ways re food - they only eat branded cheerio's for example not because it's branded but Lidl's own taste totally different

Ejismyf · 05/12/2023 21:36

I don't know, I only like a certain type of milk. My kids don't like school dinners and prefer packed lunches, lots of my friends and sister wish their kids were the same as it saves a fortune every week and to be honest having seen the school dinners and had to try them they aren't the best. I can also understand why a child wouldn't like a busy water taxi. I don't think these three things alone particularly mean they are brats

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EarringsandLipstick · 05/12/2023 21:37

It's a forum you don't get to police what opinions we have !

Do try to read.

I'm not policing your opinion. I'm not even 'policing' your writing.

I'm commenting that referring to someone's children so nastily, as you did, is horrible. Which it is.

You can make your point without being so derogatory.

tunainatin · 05/12/2023 21:39

I think the first answer you got was spot on - you've identified something they may be becoming an issue and you can correct it without making a big deal out of it.

Iloveburgerswaymorethanishould · 05/12/2023 21:42

Ardith · 05/12/2023 18:18

No, they’re just being honest with their mum. School food is mostly disgusting and nowhere near the quality of a packed lunch. Venice crowded water taxis suck and are even a bot scary, certainly nowhere near as nice as a private transfer.

You sound tired and fed up of their high standards and I get that. But they aren’t wrong to say that nice stuff is better than crappy stuff.

I work in a school kitchen and most of we offer is lovely!!! All cooked/baked on site etc. Nothings allowed to be fried etc. We even make up little cheese/cracker things and fruit pots (all fresh everyday), so not all school dinners are that bad 😀
(I have to add though, I love hospital food as well, so maybe it’s me 😂😂😂).
It’s just all about preference and they are showing what they do and don’t like. My 4 year old will only have calpol, not own branded painkiller. He would rather be in pain than have it…. They will probably realise themselves soon enough that some milk is better than no milk

Jaxhog · 05/12/2023 21:44

It's one thing to have preferences. It's quite another to behave like a brat when you don't get them. High standards should also include behaviour.

saraclara · 05/12/2023 21:44

If they're like this at 7 and 8, they're going to be truly obnoxious as teens.

Your DH is being very short sighted. Seeing them as just having high standards is madness. They don't have high standards of themselves. They have high expectations of others to provide them with their ridiculous expectations. And that's called being spoiled and entitled.

saraclara · 05/12/2023 21:45

High standards should also include behaviour.

Exactly

SavageTomato · 05/12/2023 21:45

Yup they are being really bratty. Don't give them options. You're in charge. Say it and mean it: this is what you are getting and you'll say thank you for it after. Capiche? Shocking how entitled kids get while so young. Nip it in the bud now.

FeetupTvon · 05/12/2023 21:53

Your kids are going to become adults with zero resilience.
Volunteer them to help out in a food bank.

PaperDoIIs · 05/12/2023 21:55

SavageTomato · 05/12/2023 21:45

Yup they are being really bratty. Don't give them options. You're in charge. Say it and mean it: this is what you are getting and you'll say thank you for it after. Capiche? Shocking how entitled kids get while so young. Nip it in the bud now.

Or they can just not have it and no alternatives(or something easy and boring like toast). Forcing them to have something AND be grateful for it or at least pretend to and lie is shitty parenting.

SkaneTos · 05/12/2023 21:55

saraclara · 05/12/2023 21:45

High standards should also include behaviour.

Exactly

I agree with this.

EarringsandLipstick · 05/12/2023 21:55

SavageTomato · 05/12/2023 21:45

Yup they are being really bratty. Don't give them options. You're in charge. Say it and mean it: this is what you are getting and you'll say thank you for it after. Capiche? Shocking how entitled kids get while so young. Nip it in the bud now.

I can't agree with this.

It's fine to express a preference, eg over milk. Many of us as adults would be exactly the same - it isn't any different to kids.

They don't get to be rude or whiny though. They can just express their preference & recognise that might mean they've to go without milk that day in that case.

PutinSmellsPassItOn · 05/12/2023 21:56

Kids that age should be making their own packed lunches.....the milk might have tasted funny to them tho. I'm not a massive drinker of milk tbh but Cravendale tastes vile to me.

I'd be pulling them up on bratty behaviour and enabling them to make their own choices and have a little control in their lives by giving them some responsibility

EarringsandLipstick · 05/12/2023 21:56

Forcing them to have something AND be grateful for it or at least pretend to and lie is shitty parenting.

👏👏

babyproblems · 05/12/2023 21:57

Milk is pretty much all the same, so yes imo they sound bratty. How would they even know?? They would only learn that different brands are a thing from you.. so if you are picky then they are likely to be fusspots aswell. Seeing as you mention ‘favourite brand’ and ‘back up brand’ when talking about milk; I’m inclined to think you are tbh!!!

belgiumchocolates · 05/12/2023 21:58

Your children are priveliged and will be living this lifestyle as per DH's point.

I personally think they are brats in the making and I'd be pressing this point home 'drink the milk you are given and be thankful for it'

mrwalkensir · 05/12/2023 22:02

might have already been said, but if you're small/short (ie 7 &8) getting on a crowded water bus is probably a lot more stressy than a water taxi.

MsRosley · 05/12/2023 22:04

Appleblum · 05/12/2023 18:24

I have been thinking about it though - as an adult I definitely prefer Godiva to Cadburys and that's OK. I also prefer driving places in my own car than taking the bus, and that's also OK. Why am I then uneasy with kids being this way?

Because having expensive tastes is a privilege that should be earned, not demanded on someone else's dollar.

stayathomer · 05/12/2023 22:05

Branded is much nicer than supermarket milk to be fair but yes they could possibly be on the way to being finicky about everything and anything (I think people using the word brats are being a bit ott, they’re still young!). Definitely start getting them to have to eat and drink more variety, use more public transport, walk more places and help out at home and you’ll be well covered (and I’m a hypocrite here, as our shopping trips can be dodgy, they try to sneak in more expensive cream crackers, bread etc all the time and act like the world is ending because we only get non supermarket brand cereal when it’s hugely discounted!!!)

EarringsandLipstick · 05/12/2023 22:05

babyproblems · 05/12/2023 21:57

Milk is pretty much all the same, so yes imo they sound bratty. How would they even know?? They would only learn that different brands are a thing from you.. so if you are picky then they are likely to be fusspots aswell. Seeing as you mention ‘favourite brand’ and ‘back up brand’ when talking about milk; I’m inclined to think you are tbh!!!

Why wouldn't they know?!
They know what they like tasting, and what they don't.

They don't have to know about brands, just their taste preference.

stayathomer · 05/12/2023 22:07

babyproblems
Theres a huge difference between milk tastes, I think if you held a tasting most people would tell the difference!!!!

CowboyJoanna · 05/12/2023 22:09

I don't think you even needed to ask this question. Your kids are brats, and I'm guessing the apple didn't fall far from the tree either ffs

PaperDoIIs · 05/12/2023 22:10

@MsRosley but their tastes develop based on what their parents give them. Maybe if they were exposed to different milks younger, they wouldn't have found the random one OP got so off putting.