Middle class families seem so much busier in the run up to Christmas

[Santasfakebeard]

The mc families in DC school seem to have something on the whole month of Dec judging by the dc's class whatsapp groups. Is it just a middle class thing? Pantos, choirs, concerts, wreath making & mulled wine family evenings, markets abroad, carol singing.
I would love my dc to experience it all but we simply don't have the funds.
Is it just the mc & umc that can afford to offer their dc those festive experiences?

Are they all doing all the things or is it just different people doing different things? Either way it sounds exhausting.

Still, it doesn't justify ruining it.

How do you knock/ring doors whilst on horseback? Do you bring the horse right up to the front door?

@feralunderclass I'd love to know too! The photo is on MFs insta page, it honestly was the most umc class thing I've seen in my life. Probably completely normal in their village though! I'm sure their kids had a wonderful time!

Although I will never understand why in England theatre, opera and ballet is only for educated MC people

Exactly - why is is middle class to go to the ballet but working class to go to a football match. Even though the ticket for the football probably costs (a lot) more!

Although I will never understand why in England theatre, opera and ballet is only for educated MC people

It’s (a) expensive !!!
and (b) I don’t know of any other countries where the working class are avid opera and ballets fans !

Yeah, there was a woman a few years ago where she was berating us 'lower classes' for being 'commercialized' and wasting money by 'setting budgets to spend for the sake of spending' on buying 'tat'.

Apparently she was so much more superior because instead of buying unnecessary presents (because her kids have everything the could possibly need) she took her kids to xmas markets and the polar train and for xmas they are skiing in the Alps.

From her wonderful wisdom, don't we know 'experiences' are better than 'tat from places like B&M & poundland so thats why she spends her money year round instead on gymnastics, riding lessons and family holidays etc... instead 'rubbish'.

She didn't like it when almost everyone then pointed out that budgets where needed not as an 'aim' to spend x amount but because we don't have any more to spend than x amount.

Also that not buying the £100 worth of Xmas presents we budgeted for our kids (after saving all year) would NOT suddenly magically fund ski trips, foreign holidays, horseys and expensive year round hobbies or anything close to the life she lives. Also that we can't afford to buy our kids a new Iphone randomly because they cracked theres or update their macbook because it slowed down at the drop of a hat so our kids don't 'have everything they could ever want all year round'.

Seemed quite a shock for her to realize she wasn't a genius who 'knew better than us' but rather just another out of touch rich person who couldn't see her rather obvious privilege.

I know a woman like this irl. She loves to boast about how she doesn't spoil her kids with endless presents because making memories is more important. Making memories is definitely easier in your huge house with a pool and acres of land combined with several holidays every year.

Wow, so classism is alive and well. Why is it ok to sneer at people who can afford to do things like this, but not ok for them to comment on their ‘lower class’ acquaintances who can’t? Can you imagine the uproar if someone asked “is it normal for lower class families to never be able to afford to do things with their children”?

I don’t know whether I class as MC or not but my partner and I work hard, full time, all year in a well paid role so that we can afford to do fun things and give our daughter experiences. She knows not all her friends get the same opportunities as her and is grateful for what she gets. She also knows we can only do it all because Mummy and Daddy both work.

Why have you assumed it’s to do with class, anyway? I know several ‘working class’ families who do just as much or more than we do, because they work hard and save up specifically for things like this.

Mainly it's down to cold hard cash. In the run up to Christmas, DH and I are spending a few days in Italy. Then we've booked a pretty cottage in The Lakes with the DCs for a few days. When we get home I'm treating them to a fancy spa day on the 21st and a festive afternoon tea at a 5* hotel on the 22nd. Christmas Day lunch is at a lovely restaurant in our village. And that's not including the social stuff DH and I are doing with our friends in December - and the DCs visiting Amsterdam together for a few days on their own.

But I certainly didn't grow up doing all this and neither did DH.

Popping back to this thread because I’ve just seen an advert for a £1 trial for the Royal Opera House’s streaming service. I imagine the usual cost is quite a bit more and you would have to remember to cancel but you could watch the Royal Ballet Nutcracker for a quid over Christmas!

It is a bit of a funny thread.

I suspect that MC people book things well in advance. I take my daughter to the ballet at Christmas but book it in Feb / March (partly because that’s when they release tickets and partly because, if you book early enough, you can get half price children’s tickets). It’s expensive but by December I sort of forget that it’s expensive.

We also take the children to see Father Christmas on a steam railway with the grandparents. This gets booked in October.

Once you add in all the school stuff, it turns out that we do quite a lot before Christmas.

Once we get past New Year, the slots for sailing training in the summer get released and we have only a few minutes to book that (about seven months in advance).

No we’re very middle class but never bothered with that shite. Mind you we are geeks…

I think that kind of showy off conspicuous consumption is very lower middle class tbh 🙊

I've had professional jobs and I've had manual/caring jobs

Professional jobs are WAY easier on the work/life balance, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Not to say they're easy money, they're not - but no shifts, no physical exhaustion, usually get to have time off for medical appointments and home emergencies, working from home a couple of days a week ..

I miss the rewarding nature of care work but I couldn't go back.

wtf is a “mulled wine family evening”?

I think that's self explanatory to be fair @TooOldForThisNonsense 🤣

I live in NI where WhatsApp parents groups are not really a thing tg, cos I would have yeeted the fone out the window a long time ago, I really like that term sharents 😜....I know my sil in Londres feels obliged to be on them....I'm taking my DD to a hotel for a night because she did the transfer test, just me and her, a treat for working so hard.We went to a hospital Christmas party which was free, my son has down syndrome. We might slope about the town and see the lights some evening. Otherwise I am embracing my JOMO. She's doing a Christmas play in her drama group. I'm a solicitor. Is that MC? We don't really do class here either! And finally, all that stuff is not REALLY what it's about, is it.

Very much appreciated, thank you 💐

We have a lot on but most of it’s free or V cheap.

Panto booked months in advance with cheap seats, Xmas day out seeing Santa taking in markets etc same day. Xmas movie day in the house, rest is with grand parents / other family. Grandparents love the Xmas stuff with the kids and we get a babysitter.

we as adults are doing a day at a European market (early/late flights) got returns for £36 for both of us.

Most things have been booked well in advance though so costs been spread out over the year, then on the day only have to worry about spending money and even then cheap and cheerful food and possibly a hot chocolate.

I’ll be honest though even as an adult December for me seems crazy with other stuff too.

Is this a class thing? I’m not sure. We are always super busy in December but we have 5 DC so there’s always a lot going on. Eldest DC are in a Christmas play the day after DC4’s nativity, then DC5 has a party at nursery a few days after which we have to attend. There’s Christmas fairs at school to contend with and I do tend to book at least one Christmas event each weekend.

I’m guessing it’s an evening where the family drink wine that is mulled ? I could be wrong

Do you actually hear yourself?

My god, your the exact personification of the stereotype you are moaning of being labeled with. You are not a victim.

Why does everything come back to percieved 'class' though? I do like ballet & opera but don't go often.. on the other hand, I go & collect FREE holly & ivy every year.. beautifully crisp out there in the woods & fields, I love it! Oh & go the Christingle at church. My kids aren't tiny any more but I love seeing the wonder on the tinies' faces (and singing carols!)

@DGPP
reading it back it is very nasty and harsh post. I’m happy your Dc enjoy those things. it should just be about enjoying what you do and not constant documentation. Genuinely didn’t mean to come across dickish. I am sorry.

it’s just a worry when it becomes competitive (not saying you are) and etc etc