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MIL said I need to take better care of my husband

251 replies

caggas · 20/11/2023 10:11

I thought we could play a fun guessing game of why my MIL, without a shred of sarcasm, told me I need to take better care of my (42 year old) husband.

Winner can keep her!

OP posts:
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5
GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 21/11/2023 18:27

He found that the belt of his dressing gown of doom was missing, obviously because of the appalling carelessness of the laundry maid, who should have stitched it on securely so it wouldn’t have gone missing in the first place.

TortoiseT · 21/11/2023 18:34

My MIL, when visiting in my husband’s days off and whilst I had three under 6, breastfeeding youngest one, regularly made comments such as “I don’t think X (husband) has had a chance to eat” or “have you even got a chance to sit and eat?”, when my husband used to let me eat before baby woke up to feed (which I never got to do during the week obviously).
If eating out, she puts extra bits of food from her plate onto my husband’s plate. My husband and I usually share two meals 50/50, normally an unhealthy and a healthier option- once she had a physical jerk reaction to the waiter placing the steak in front of me and the salad in front of my husband. She then physically removed the steak from in front of me, swapping it with the salad that was served for my husband. I swapped them back. She will always always ask my husband if he wants seconds, my husband usually replying “no, but my wife I think would love some” (she hates this).

On a holiday, I took a morning “off” to do a supermarket shop while she went for a walk in the woods with husband and the kids. There was a steep hill to climb back to the cottage. When I came back, she’d returned with DD age 7. I asked where DH and boys 18m and 3 were. She said: “he is having to struggle up the hill with the two boys, that’s why we made it back earlier.”. I got annoyed, walked down the hill, met husband leisurely strolling up the hill with two happy, fully walking boys. I carried the 18m old back to the cottage whilst he took his time coming up with the 3yo (who walked the whole way).

Hubby and I had an argument that night and then she came to hug me out of the blue the next day saying she “loves me”. She probably felt she’d caused the argument. Which she had of course. Last time I have a holiday with her, next time husband can go with the kids, I really can’t be bothered to handle her.

Daleksatemyshed · 21/11/2023 18:36

@Raincloudsonasunnyday and after that your MIL is still alive? I can only deeply admire your self control 😂

SunshineAutumnday · 21/11/2023 18:37

How very dare you!😂

Funny enough, my DH used to complain that he had odd socks and blamed my washing abities. So, now he does his own washing and the biggest shocker is... he still has odd socks. Despite buying lots of news ones.

viques · 21/11/2023 18:44

You didn’t unwrap the biscuits and put them in the tin?

You don’t butter his toast?

You don’t tuck a clean hanky into his pocket every morning?

BooBooDoodle · 21/11/2023 18:44

I’m really lucky that my MIL is lovely. When we bought our first house together she told me that he knows how to iron, wash dishes and pick up the slack. He still irons but general picking up has become my job over the years which he needs a firm reminder every so often. I don’t understand where these MIL get off being so concerned with their adult children. If he put odd socks on then surely that’s her fault from not teaching him about sock pairing as a child? What a biff!

Mammajay · 21/11/2023 18:45

I would opt for not ironing his clothes. It's a visible thing to see her son in creased clothing!

Completelydonechick · 21/11/2023 18:47

i bet you didn’t iron his pants

Parky04 · 21/11/2023 18:52

pinkyredrose · 20/11/2023 10:16

He had to wipe his own arse.

I thought this was always a wife chore!

Juststopamoment · 21/11/2023 18:57

We don’t want him 😏.

Mishka3085 · 21/11/2023 18:58

He had to iron his work shirts? Poor boy.

No word of a lie my MIL said this to my man as I was upstairs feeding our newborn, after a c section and I messaged him saying to get her out before I flung her out. I have many other stories. She’s going for free also 😂

SunnySailor · 21/11/2023 19:00

You didn't meet him at the front door (fully made up and wearing your Sunday best of course) when he came home from work with his slippers warmed and his dinner on the table?

Nanaof1 · 21/11/2023 19:00

caggas · 20/11/2023 10:11

I thought we could play a fun guessing game of why my MIL, without a shred of sarcasm, told me I need to take better care of my (42 year old) husband.

Winner can keep her!

He had to find a pair of matching socks in his dresser drawers all by himself?

I promise I did not read far enough to see the winner declared. But I do know that some men seem to find "sock sorting" as a woman's job.

Mine never made me sort his socks, but when I didn't, he just shoved them all into a drawer and since they were white tube socks (various makes and looks), he figured that was close enough, so would just grab any old two out.
Drove me nuts when going to wash them and trying to see if I had all of them. I finally gave up and washed what was there and let him deal with it.

Iwasafool · 21/11/2023 19:01

Juststopamoment · 21/11/2023 18:57

We don’t want him 😏.

It isn't his fault though. He might think his mother is bat shit, my husband did when my late MIL came out with this sort of thing.

Nanaof1 · 21/11/2023 19:02

SunnySailor · 21/11/2023 19:00

You didn't meet him at the front door (fully made up and wearing your Sunday best of course) when he came home from work with his slippers warmed and his dinner on the table?

You forgot the "drink ready for him" and a foot massage for his poor achy feet. 😉

JANEY205 · 21/11/2023 19:03

My husband does his own laundry and so he would have to take better care of himself if his socks were odd 😂

tolerable · 21/11/2023 19:14

he wingedat her because hes too scared to approach you himself

Mothership4two · 21/11/2023 19:19

When I was pregnant with DS1 DH had a phase of having to leave for work at 5am. DM told me at the time that I should be getting up with him every day - I think the gist was to make his breakfast and eat with him. DF started chuckling in the corner and said DM had never got up with him in his entire working career and he had always taken her a cup of tea in bed before he left for work. DH said he was quite happy pottering about on his own first thing and didn't particularly want or need me there to keep him company or serve him!

MIL doesn't usually make these type of comments. She once had a cob on with me when DH's car was in the garage for a few days and I had a rare weekend away with girlfriends booked and was taking my car - leaving DH with our 2 DS. She and SIL lobbied me to go by train which would have been really inconvenient as we were going to quite a remote cottage nowhere near a train station or bus route. MIL said that she was sure one of my friends would pick me up - I'm sure they would but it really would have been a long way out of their way and would have tied them down to my timings. Then they started on DH and BIL offered him the use of his car. DH put them in their place, couldn't understand why they were fussing and said he would be absolutely fine. We have parks and shops within walking distance as well as a big garden. Other than that MIL has been OK

GettingStuffed · 21/11/2023 19:22

I've never seen DH in odd socks but he deals with his own. He acts all shocked if I wear a matching pair although he thinks I should put DGS in a matching pair when his parents don't.

IpsyUpsyDaisyDoos · 21/11/2023 19:23

Mine once said "you shouldn't let him eat....." and then listed all his favourite things. I said "he's a grown man, I don't LET him do anything, he makes his own choices". She's said nothing if the sort to me since. Although she will only ask me about things because she doesn't trust "the boys to know things".

Mothership4two · 21/11/2023 19:25

SunnySailor · 21/11/2023 19:00

You didn't meet him at the front door (fully made up and wearing your Sunday best of course) when he came home from work with his slippers warmed and his dinner on the table?

A friend of mine was constantly being told off by her mum for not getting up when her husband came home to give him a kiss and make him a drink (we were in our 20s then). They both worked full time and friend worked longer hours and had the higher salary - not that that matters, but she wasn't at home buffing her nails while he worked his fingers to the bone!

Tessabelle74 · 21/11/2023 19:26

I'm not joining in in case I'm right, I don't want her!

Sennelier1 · 21/11/2023 19:31

You didn't open the frontdoor for him before he needed to use his key?

AmazingSnakeHead · 21/11/2023 19:35

I think my DP has the makings of a MIL. We're going away tomorrow and he's just informed me that none of his clothes are clean because really "he expected me to spend today preparing for the trip" which includes washing his clothes. I asked him to clarify, does he really mean that I should have taken the day off work to wash his clothes? Yes he really did mean that. Does he really mean at the expense of a day off over Christmas? Yes he does. Insane. And not that it matters but I earn twice as much as him, and work longer hours.

Hello55 · 21/11/2023 19:38

Guesswho88 · 20/11/2023 11:06

Are they Asian OP? or your MIL is very elderly (respectfully). As in she conforms to past generational expectations..

Asian? That sounds quite stereotypical and ignorant.. its no different to the backward view of the mil that men need looking after 🤔

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