Thread 11 - TalkLair: “The candle flame gutters. Its little pool of light trembles.”

[Kucinghitam]

Whoops, missed the filling up of the previous thread! (thread 10).

Although the nights are gradually drawing in, the new lair of JTT escapees is all cosy and homey inside. The hearth is glowing, the walls covered in dubious artwork, books by non-approved authors line the shelves, rugs are down on the floors (and assorted pets curled up on them).

We just won’t mention the gnawed bones of our prey over there in the corner of the cave…

Our short little road is on a bit of a slope, and when it gets icy there's a distinct possibility of slithering all the way down into the main road to certain doom. So in icy conditions residents tend to proceed along the pavement by clinging on to garden walls, fences and railings and "pulling" ourselves along.

Last winter I was proceeding thusly down the road and encountered my next-door neighbour (bloke) who was going up the road towards his house. Neither of us felt safe letting go of the fences, and so there had to be an awkward-yet-politely-elegant railing-based pas de deux ballet manoeuvre where we moved past each other.

When my brother lived in Bath there was a road opposite their place with quite a slope. When we visited once, one morning me and Mr Veg were watching a strange display of two men shuffling along in the gutter on their bottoms and were trying to figure what they were up to, as the road and pavement looked perfectly normal. After a while we figured out it was black ice and seriously slippery.

Working in healthcare I've become obsessed with people falling, and trying to prevent it. Then again, growing up watching Chaplin and Laurel and Hardy, I also find it funny as fuck when it happens (to members of the public, not my patients), as long as it doesn't happen to me or course.

Oh, and hello thread people, I've been away for a while.

Welcome back Pike, how have you been?!

@Dotellhimpike ! I find falling over hilarious. I got told off by a stranger once for laughing when my mum fell over in the snow but my mum was also laughing. Mind your business, woman! Unless I hurt myself when I fall I also find it quite funny when I have an epically stupid fall although these days I fear for my fragile bones so it's not quite as funny.

The best one I did, which didn't actually result in a fall, was years ago. I tripped and the momentum was carrying me forward and forward and ... I just managed to stop the momentum before I fell down a pub basement door in the pavement that was open. If I'd fallen down, not so funny. Possibly dead.

I've been good, busy as usual, new house coming along, mustn't grumble. Thank you for asking, hope everyone here has been good.

@MouseMinge Glad to see I'm not the only one with a slapstick sense of humour.

When you spend your childhood summer holidays watching Laurel and Hardy it would be almost impossible not to like a bit of slapstick.

Unfortunately, I've not been so good. The c word has come to call. Thankfully, I have some great medics on my side/case.

I tripped over some kind of maritime hook cemented into a dock in Crete when baby weasel and I were on holiday about 5 years ago. I sprawled over, skinning my knees a bit, but got up fairly quickly and a passing man asked if I was ok. So, a standard somewhat painful mortifying fall, but nothing out of the ordinary. Except - something about it looked so amusing to baby weasel that she was absolutely sobbing with laughter. Sometimes she thinks about it for no good reason now and then and starts crying and laughing all over again.

I mean, you try to tell yourself it wasn't that bad, but obviously it was so much more shaming than I can even imagine.

Oh FFS! I am so sorry to hear this. I'm also a bit pissed off at the unfairness of it all, hence the FFS. Sending you love and good vibes, for what it's worth. xxx,

I hate falling over! The shock of it makes me feel stupid (and often makes me cry). My most recent fall was unwitnessed though which you’d think would be better but it was in my own front garden quite late at night. No sooner had I realised that I was on my knees (which always hurt) but facing slightly downhill which wasn’t conducive to getting back up than my neighbour came out of his house to take the dog for a bedtime walk. I had to ask him to come and help me up. Luckily he’s a lovely man but the advantage of being helped by random strangers is that you never have to see them again.

The falling thread is making me remember many incidents of going flying when out and about. This is not good! It’s a great thread though.

I know it's still November, but I've already subscribed myself to this thread. Because I love Christmas decorations and frankly I need some cheering up.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4951833-the-ultimate-show-us-your-tree-megathread?

I always want to cry when I fall over - I have had to bring in a count to 10 rule ( known as the 10 motherfucker count) before I allow myself to cry. The counting to 10 motherfuckers seems to let the shock stuff get out of my system and then I can assess if I'm genuinely hurt.

Oh god, imagine being given something like this.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4952340-unwanted-gift-etiquette-and-the-giant-dinosaur

OMG! That's possibly the worst unsolicited Christmas gift I've ever seen.

I hate it but my grandchildren would love it.

Who knew Christmas dinosaurs were a thing?

That’s a bizarre thing to send!

Such an irresponsible granny. A dinosaur is for life, not just for Christmas.

I thought the Floating Illuminated Globe we were given one year was bad enough, but at least it was small. A six foot inflatable, light-up dinosaur is just awful. Hopefully the MiL won't be too hurt when it's rejected.

Is it me, or does this dog have an italian accent?

https://twitter.com/dog_rates/status/1729641244060447031

It's not you.

Don’t wish to be rude, but why don’t I understand any of this thread or what it’s about 😬

He sounds Romanian to me.