What’s the best advice you’ve ever been given?

[Awwwwooooga]

I thought I had read this thread before but can’t seem to find it, so I’ll ask again. What’s the best advice that you’ve ever received? I’m in need of some inspiration. My two are:
Don’t take criticism from someone who you wouldn’t take advice from; and
Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good

"You dont have to believe everything your brain tells you"

Said to me during a counselling session. I'll never forget the shock and realisation that she was right

From my 20 something self; don't get credit cards and spend like it's your own money.

Kill them with kindness.

No not always.

Nah not always. 😂

The grass is always greener on the other side because it's fed with BS.

Take our hand and jump.

My Adult children to me. So I did. And life is so much better.

It's better not to have what you want than to be stuck with what you don't want.

I often read on here some complicated work scenario and think

Where are you in this story?

so often people get heavily invested in a situation that is absolutely nothing to do with them and they want to stick their oar in when they should keep their beaky nose out.

But it's very often the case that challenging life situations feel like they're going to be the death of you and if you can survive, it makes you a more resourceful person and prepares you well for the next time it happens - especially work situations, you can anticipate and shore up your defences been there, done that!

People don't change.

and..

Measure twice, cut once.

No, but you can roll it in glitter and spray it with air freshener!

'Only dead fish go with the flow'

'Do not feed your pain to one who will melt it into bullets'

'My integrity, my dignity, my self respect, boundaries, morality, honour and standards are inviolable. They are not for sale. Not ever. Not to anyone'

'Concentrate on keeping your side of the street clean lest, in clearing up another's mess, you wear out your broom'

Many more, but that will do for now!

@coodawoodashooda

You should never be close enough to the car in front that you need to break if they stop. You should leave a big enough space/stopping distance

The one that I don't go along with is about 'Nothing worth having comes easily.'

Have noticed all throughout my life with friends/colleagues/relationships/career that the ones that were a struggle right from the start and presented all kinds of barriers and difficulties were a sign that they weren't right for me after all.
Wish i had realised that at the time.

Also, the bloody 'Ask the Universe' one pisses me off big time.
Usually said by Slebz (who paid for the best selling book) and relates to their love life or career.

What about people with atrocious lives or disabilities.
Are they not wishing to The Milky Way/Andromeda hard enough? 🤨

Differentiate your circles
Your circle of worry vs your circle of influence
The circle worry has to take less of your headspace i.e. fix what you can control and the rest has to be someone else's problem.

The best thing you can ever do for your child is to be mentally and emotionally well yourself.

Said to me by therapist while I was going through divorce. I was a way over-stretched, over-sacrificing mum, stressing myself sick about every tiny thing I could do to support my dd through it, without focusing on healing myself. It allowed me to heal myself, for her. And has allowed me to focus not just on her happiness, but mine ever since.

The safety she feels and the free flow of love I can extend to her, as a well and happy woman are the best gifts ever.

The phrase I say the most myself is 'you only get one life'- I gave up my career as a doctor to retrain as I was so unhappy. It was a big shock to all around me and I used this quote many a time to explain the decision I had made. (right decision)

'If you're going through he'll keep going'. I think this to myself frequently when going through hard times. Bad times tend to finish (even if it's a sad outcome, like death of an ill family member), you just have to keep trudging forward.

"Slow down as you get to this corner" - my dad in a driving lesson. There was some idiot overtaking the other way just around it.

More generally - you never really win an argument.

Stand behind a shooter, in front of a shitter.

Kids will push boundaries a bit like how we push the safety barrier protecting us on a rollercoaster. If we feel where the safety barrier (or boundary) clicks into place, it makes us feel safe and we can have fun. If we don’t, we will keep pushing and pushing (the boundary) and not feel safe.

Worrying about something doesn't make it less likely to happen - for example, worrying your DP is going to cheat doesn't have an impact either way so worrying and being insecure about is it pointless.

As an HCP - "if you've never been complained about by a patient, you're not doing your job properly".

Why not?

If you’re lying in bed at night wondering whether or not you need to go for a pee, always get up immediately and go for one. Otherwise you’ll be awake for ages and it’ll get worse.