Do you do stuff to deliberately annoy others?

[EveSix]

Just read a comment on a different thread where a poster stated that as they realised other posters found a particular action irritating (something quite inconsequential, but annoying to some), said poster said they felt inclined to do this thing more frequently. A subsequent poster immediately agreed.

It doesn't really matter what it was (but for full disclosure, it was about MN quoting etiquette) as this thread isn't about that, but more generally: do you find that you purposely do things because you know it annoys or irritates others? If so, what is it about for you?

I'm not talking about things which are necessary for you to do but which may disturb someone else for instance -like get up for a wee in the night-, but things which are of no consequence to you, but which you might go out of your way to do because you know a specific person will notice it and feel aggrieved.

DP couldn't give two hoots which way the looroll goes on, but because he knows I like it a certain way, he puts fresh rolls on the opposite way. Just because.

In my workplace, one cleaner knows the caretaker does a particular task in a certain order, and deliberately does a seemingly insignificant thing which means that, once a week, the caretaker's routine is disrupted. Just because.

I can't wrap my head around it and am really curious as to what the motivation is?

This is illogical, if you don’t notice or care about peoples dining habits then why did you find it so funny to make yourself look ill mannered? Onky someone who notices or cares would think to do that.

but I mean ok, you’re maybe just on the wrong thread, the op asked if anyone purposefully does stuff to annoy others. You’ve responded and said you once found it funny to make yourself look boorish for some reason and are now regaling us with how you can’t drive and your boyfriend is free to shag anyone he wishes, as are you apparently.

that’s great but not a bar of it is related to what the op asked. Hence why you’re being asked to start your own thread about how you like to live,

I'm guessing it's attention seeking or maybe their insecurity?
Whatever the motivation it's a serious turn off for me. 🙄

I am not usually a petty person and I would usually never purposefully do something to irritate someone. With one exception, and in my defence, it's a response to THEIR annoying behaviour:

Our village high street is not very big - maybe 100m? - there are parking bays where there's space available outside the shops. these are obviously part of the council owned-managed part of the high street. One of the local shops is one I tried very hard to support over many years but the consistent rudeness and unpleasantness eventually made me decide I could not enter ever again. I have stuck to that. They also, at some point, decided that the two bays directly outside their shop are "THEIR" parking spaces and have put up signs saying, "OUR SHOP customers only". I park there whenever the opportunity comes up.

What's now really winding me up is that some of the other shops have adopted a similar practice and keep putting up signs to say this bay is for their customers only. I find it very annoying and just continue to park there if I need to.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I appreciate that if you want people to come to your shop and they can't park, that's probably an issue for you. But this is a high street, people come to the high street for lots of reasons and they park where they can and do their shopping where they need to. The bakery, for example, does not have a bay outside so do all these other shop owners think the bakery customers should never be allowed to park in the village?!

omg. there's some really unnecessarily deep analysis of that dinner party going on here. Clearly the people who took time to post about how boorish/common/rude/nasty etc it was care about the whole thing a lot more than I do!

Or maybe @TedMullins is comfortable in their own skin . Many if us are .Shock 😲.

But it's none of those things. You think you are annoying people but we're telling you that you're not. What you're describing is your reaction to a feeling of your own discomfort during a certain situation. In fact, your behaviour would most likely make others feel collectively superior to you.

I didn't say it was any of those things, other people did. I've said many times it was nothing more than me amusing myself by doing things that poked fun at the expected etiquette because I thought it was an example of the kind of thing OP was asking about, being contrary on purpose. I wasn't uncomfortable (apart from being next to a sex offender, but I think most people would be there) but honestly if it makes you feel better to think that I was and everyone was laughing and feel sorry for me please do keep telling yourself that.

Fuck me MN is full to the brim with armchair psychologists. I think most people would rather have a fun evening sat with Tedmullins than the other choice of " Soooo are you the only nonce or does it run in your family "? . Type of dinner conversation .

Is a discussion forum not for discussions? Fair enough you don't care about my lifestyle (but the way you describe it absolutely proves the point that people are uncomfortable with nonconforming behaviour) but that was in response to a PP specifically asking about my views on lifestyle and conformity so it was relevant.

Oh I forgot about the woman opposite me who said vegetarians should wear little green hats so the waiters didn't give them the wrong food. My response: "what, like a plant-based dunce cap?"

🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
My DH is literally nearly wetting himself !

@TedMullins that woman actually did say something funny though, you just paraphrased what she said. Do you think that's you being funny? It's just piggybacking on someone else's joke. A bit David Brent-esque.

but the way you describe it absolutely proves the point that people are uncomfortable with nonconforming behaviour

You're the only person talking about this.

no she was actually being serious.

Is he drunk?

Doesn’t a lot of external validation come from either fitting in or seeming like the “best” person in a given social group by standing out? Humans are herd animals. People who annoy for the sake of it seem to be those who either want to stand out and thereby become popular - an irritating version of Lady Gaga’s meat dress, say - or those who have done something mildly annoying and funny before and push it too far. There are some examples of people annoying other people when they stand up for their principles, I don’t agree with her politics at all but the same spirit which led Theresa May to embrace being “bloody difficult”, but that’s a side effect not a reason for her actions.

The "tag for posh nonces" is just offensive to another person and could have been upsetting-why would you do that? Mixing your wine-feel free. Bit of a waste if it was nice wine-but knock yourself out. The Spoons comment could have been mildly amusing, I suppose.

Conforming and standing out are both purposeful tools. All behaviour is, unless it's the product of some illness or condition.

The argument otherwise is also a tool, used either in ignorance or deliberately, to undermine or discredit another person. I guess you could call it an ad hominem response. No reasonable counter response? Call it pointless, without reason, thereby questioning the status or respect that person is due instead. Or otherwise directly suggest they have some illness or condition to achieve the same goal

Can I ask then if you agree it wasn’t annoying to people why you posted it on a thread asking if you annoy people? You specifically answered “yes” to the question then stated this was an example of that.

thats what people are responding on. It’s simply not annoying to anyone else. It simply reflects on you and you find it funny, that’s fabulous.

and as for your unconventional lifestyle, please remember this is an anonymous forum and you don’t know who you’re speaking to. I can categorically assure you my answer didn’t display discomfort to your lifestyle it displayed an eye rolling lack of interest in your ability to drive or your open or casual relationship.

Dustpantsandbush, if it's good enough for Gandalf!😊

https://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/aMAwyA1_700bwp.webp

No because it's 1.45 pm and he doesn't drink . What the fuck is wrong with you?

Are Sperm and Ted partners perchance?

Nope never met . Is that all you've got ????

and it's Mrs Scarecrow to you , you don't know me well enough to call me sperm 😉

Same person 🙄

Sorry but the " Tag for posh nonces " was comedy gold . Nobody and I mean nobody should have sympathy for a convicted nonce !