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Original poster

Bedrooms are trashed. Finding it hard see pics

175 replies

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 20:37

I have been through a really hard time which I hope is going in a better direction. I have to cope with things completely on my own with no support. Whilst supporting others . There's lots of mental health issues. Special needs. Vulnerability etc .

Anyway as I say some things are starting to get better. But the kids bedrooms are a shit hole . The kids are with their father this weekend so I'm trying to use the time to get things done. But I get tired and out of breath so quickly I get drained and don't get much done . I have just managed to do the 2 youngest kids room. I need to tidy /clean and take old bed apart in the spare room . And then put new double bed together for that room. I have to get it done tonight. Because my other son is coming over tomorrow to chat /company as he's struggling mentally so I don't want to do it whilst he's here .

So I'm drinking an energy drink in the hope it will help me stay awake till late /give me some energy

I have included pictures because I want to shame myself and motivate myself to get it done. I will add after pictures as well once done

Any ideas how the kids can keep it tidy ? In an easy to manage way. One child is autistic and forgets what he's doing. By the time he gets to his room . And then the younger one gets upset because he feels like it's on him.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
ShakespearesSisters · 27/10/2023 23:09

Ikea delivery starts at £5 now I think. I had a kallaxunit and a few other bits delivered for £15. It might be worth adding stuff to your basket and seeing the delivery charge.

Aria999 · 27/10/2023 23:13

DameEdna1 · 27/10/2023 23:09

Not sure if this is something your DCs would enjoy but I used to play a game with classes of reluctant tidiers when I was a teacher. You pick one thing that isn't where it should be (don't tell them what it is) and that's the magic object. The game is who can be the first to pick up and tidy the 'magic object' in its correct place is the winner (I used to give a high five 😆 which was a rubbish prize, chocolate button might work better). Once the magic object has been found, the magic jumps to another mystery item and the game continues until the room is tidy.

Might not suit your DC but it did used to get a room cleared quite quickly.

I am trying this!

Someoneonlyyouknow · 27/10/2023 23:15

That looks great now. Some homely touches after Christmas sounds like a great idea - maybe bedside tables with a nice light, a rug etc.

Re tidying, sometimes you just have to supervise kids to keep them on track. If it feels too much to tackle everything then perhaps do one thing each day - so clothes only, or Lego or drawing stuff or cars etc. Ideally have a separate box or drawer for each kind of thing? "Tidy up" is harder to understand than "Pick up all the books" followed by "Put all the Lego in this box"

I agree that asking your son to help you build the new bed might be more comfortable for him than just talking

Londonlondon4 · 27/10/2023 23:18

Well done OP, it looks way tidier.

Add a book case (can also put some favourite toys on the shelves) and some drawers (echo what others have said - much easier to store things). The rooms need colour, e.g. place a load of their artwork in large frames. Is the patch of carpet their main play area? If so add a cheap and colourful rug and beanbags. If not, maybe look at back to back storage/narrow desks to create two spaces without the height of a divide (maybe this will help each keep their side clear).

Itwasafterallallaboutme · 27/10/2023 23:25

You obviously love your Dear Children very much, and along with having food in their bellies, and a reasonably warm roof over their heads, that is all that they need. In fact there are an awful lot of families in the world who would find having those three things absolutely wonderful.

Please stop being so hard on yourself @Shithole101, your home is definitely not a shithole. I personally don't like, or even trust people who have both children and show homes for more than 2 or 3 days a year - and I couldn't even manage "show home" cleanliness and tidiness once a year, never mind 2 or 3 times! As long as there is no damp, a bit of dust and mess is absolutely ok.

One more request from me OP, please change your "name" on here, it isn't true, and thinking like that could lead you into a deep depression. You are a great and caring Mum - full stop. 💐💐💐

Original poster
Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 23:26

Wendysfriend · 27/10/2023 21:43

You have done a fantastic job on the 1st room. Well done and I bet it felt amazing standing back and seeing it done .

Regarding the second room, your son that is coming over tomorrow, would he be willing/able to help you build the bed ? That's a fairly big job.

There are some great suggestions here, however what is, if any, your budget on buying for storage etc ? I know those units etc are expensive.

I have 5 children, they're mostly grown now but they were all little once and my house felt like a toy shop and tip at times. I wasn't able to afford units from different stores , I use to have tons of the coloured boxes from Argos, I'm in Ireland and Argos are gone from here so I'm not sure if they still sell them. They were reasonably priced, held tons, they could be stacked if not overfilled, were fantastic for bits, figures, Lego, smaller toys, I always managed to fit in as much as possible, actually, IKEA do similar boxes, I know you can't get there but if you were ever to get the chance. You don't have to put these plastic boxes on units, they can sit on the floor until you are able to buy the units. I also used the big massive clear plastic storage boxes, I always found these brilliant, affordable and so, so handy to just throw things into. I also used , I can't remember the name of them but they were a tall plastic trolley with 3 big pull out drawers, I think they were advertised at the time for kitchens for holding vegetables, but I put toys, books, crafts into them, they also held small toys and the trolleys were in wheels so you could change them around the rooms easily, everyone had their own colour trolleys.

I remember trying to make the rooms feel nice, I think once the floor is clear, tidy and beds made the room looks much better. I remember cutting out characters from a colouring book one time and I stenciled them onto the walls, just drew around them and I had small paints from a child's craft set and used them to colour in the stencils I just drew on. It was temporary until I was able to afford proper units, proper paint etc

Oh and I used laundry baskets too for storage of toys , folded bed clothes, jumpers, shoes, some nice sturdy ones, some with lids. I got my kids at the time to colour their names onto A4 paper and I put that in an A4 plastic sleeve and I sellotaped it to their boxes, baskets etc

You're doing great, your kids will be delighted, when you have extra storage it's easier to keep tidy. Still to this day I have a big plastic container in most rooms and it's a quick tidy up just throwing things in, but try keep to samey things you're throwing in as it's a pain sorting and looking for stuff if it's all mixed up

Sorry i did not reply sooner. They have that box you can see plus 2 drawers each under their bed. I'm hoping I will be able to get replacement boxes for the ikea unit . Other stuff ie decorating and Cheering it up will likely happen after Xmas

OP posts:
jugodenaranja · 27/10/2023 23:30

That’s not too bad

Original poster
Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 23:31

Ontheperiphery79 · 27/10/2023 22:13

Their rooms are depressingly bare, devoid of decoration and personal touches.

Have you only just moved in?

We have been here 18 months. But there's been alot to pay out for . I can start making it more homely after Xmas

OP posts:
Original poster
Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 23:34

CatOnAMushroom · 27/10/2023 22:19

Is there a known reason for being tired and out of breath? Have you had this checked out? If not I would recommend you do as there may be a reversal cause which will help you to be able to cope.

A technique I use when struggling with motivation is to aim to do 5 small jobs (e.g. Tidy a surface) Often starting gets me motivated to do more and if not at least 5 things will be done

Possible lack of iron. I have Been to gp. Have to take folic acid for 3 months then. Redo bloods.

OP posts:
Original poster
Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 23:37

DiscoBeat · 27/10/2023 22:29

Is the wardrobe on the other side? Definitely agree with the idea of labelling boxes for everything, and shelves on the wall for special things. We used to use the Trofast stuff when they were little and each tray had a different type of toy in, labelled, so it doesn't take long to tidy up each evening.

There is no wardrobe . Just beds with drawers under it. Thr box you see and the ikea unit waiting for new boxes.

OP posts:
Northernsouloldies · 27/10/2023 23:49

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 23:31

We have been here 18 months. But there's been alot to pay out for . I can start making it more homely after Xmas

Show quote history

Ontheperiphery79 that was a harsh thoughtless comment. The op is doing her level best. When money is an object things take time.

DiscoBeat · 27/10/2023 23:50

I do think a wardrobe would help a lot, as most of the clutter seems to be clothes. It looks as though there's room for one?

Catsfrontbum · 27/10/2023 23:52

Lots of super ideas here. I would defo prioritise making the room a bit brighter with some posters/wall decorations.

Sounds like you’re off to a really good start. Stay the course and we await transformations (slowly!)

Original poster
Shithole101 · 28/10/2023 00:00

Itwasafterallallaboutme · 27/10/2023 23:25

You obviously love your Dear Children very much, and along with having food in their bellies, and a reasonably warm roof over their heads, that is all that they need. In fact there are an awful lot of families in the world who would find having those three things absolutely wonderful.

Please stop being so hard on yourself @Shithole101, your home is definitely not a shithole. I personally don't like, or even trust people who have both children and show homes for more than 2 or 3 days a year - and I couldn't even manage "show home" cleanliness and tidiness once a year, never mind 2 or 3 times! As long as there is no damp, a bit of dust and mess is absolutely ok.

One more request from me OP, please change your "name" on here, it isn't true, and thinking like that could lead you into a deep depression. You are a great and caring Mum - full stop. 💐💐💐

Aww thank you so much for your lovely post. My house will never be a show home. I just want it to look OK. They have really only had a proper bedroom for the past 18 months because we were in temporary accommodation for years and they never had a proper room. So it's kind of still new to them really. Bur they definitely love it.

The name thing is just a temporary thing fir this thread . Everyone has been lovely . But when I posted i was not sure of the type of reok repays I would get. But its mot a long term name. Thank you fir being for caring 💐

OP posts:
Original poster
Shithole101 · 28/10/2023 00:04

DiscoBeat · 27/10/2023 23:50

I do think a wardrobe would help a lot, as most of the clutter seems to be clothes. It looks as though there's room for one?

There not clothes well there,was some socks, a top , and some bedding on the floor. Their clothes are kept in my room

OP posts:
Original poster
Shithole101 · 28/10/2023 00:05

Northernsouloldies · 27/10/2023 23:49

Ontheperiphery79 that was a harsh thoughtless comment. The op is doing her level best. When money is an object things take time.

Show quote history

Ah I just took it as a question to be honest. No harm done 🙂

OP posts:
Original poster
Shithole101 · 28/10/2023 00:10

Small bedroom is done now . I still have quite alot to do on that floor . I Need to bring all the wood down from the old bed. Removed all the rubbish etc which I left on the landing. Clean tidy the bathroom. Then I need to do the last room on that floor . But im just going to slap dash that room to be honest .

Bedrooms are trashed. Finding it hard see pics
OP posts:
Sorefoot23 · 28/10/2023 00:19

You've achieved so much today.
Regarding furnishings. Try marketplace. Lots give stuff away or cheap. Olio.
Ive had some great stuff for playroom from fb. Other stuff has been ok to seeus through until can properly replace.

How old are the dcs ( may have missed that) maybe some nice accessories for xmas is an idea. Even pictures, led lights, battery lights, etc

SkankingWombat · 28/10/2023 00:20

Probably too late now given the time you first posted, but could the son that's coming over tomorrow give you a hand with the bits like the bed? You can chat and 'do' at the same time. It sounds like it's a Big Chat, so might actually be easier if your hands are busy and you don't have to make eye contact? (In the same way car journeys are a recommended method for having the more difficult talks with teens)

Original poster
Shithole101 · 28/10/2023 00:23

Sorefoot23 · 28/10/2023 00:19

You've achieved so much today.
Regarding furnishings. Try marketplace. Lots give stuff away or cheap. Olio.
Ive had some great stuff for playroom from fb. Other stuff has been ok to seeus through until can properly replace.

How old are the dcs ( may have missed that) maybe some nice accessories for xmas is an idea. Even pictures, led lights, battery lights, etc

I don't want to get 2nd hand stuff. Would rather save take my time and get new stuff. It's not that I think its a bad thing . Just we have had it rough for quite a while and I want things to feel new and reasonably matched. Plus whe you don't drive its almost impossible to get anything anyway.

OP posts:
MissMoo2222 · 28/10/2023 00:38

Argos do furniture quite cheaply but it's flatpack stuff so you'd have to build it. It can sometimes be quite flimsy but a lovely handyman gave me a great tip a few years ago which was when you build flatpack drawers, lie each drawer face down and squeeze some wood glue around the perimeter where the pieces all meet. I can't tell you how well this actually works! I've had cheap chest of drawers from Argos that should have fallen apart from the amount of clothes squeezed into them but they are as sturdy as the day I built them! The same glue can be used to secure on back panels etc or secure a loose handle.

There's nothing wrong with the rooms at all, you're doing great. As long as it's clean the mess is easily sorted just as you've done today!

Londonlondon4 · 28/10/2023 00:49

Great job OP. You‘ve inspired me to blast through a room and get it properly cleared like these.

i posted earlier on adding a bookcase/display shelf. Will add that it is worth looking at online hacks to bring in colour. E.g. Google Billy Bookcase Hacks.

Itwasamemo2 · 28/10/2023 00:51

Itwasafterallallaboutme · 27/10/2023 23:25

You obviously love your Dear Children very much, and along with having food in their bellies, and a reasonably warm roof over their heads, that is all that they need. In fact there are an awful lot of families in the world who would find having those three things absolutely wonderful.

Please stop being so hard on yourself @Shithole101, your home is definitely not a shithole. I personally don't like, or even trust people who have both children and show homes for more than 2 or 3 days a year - and I couldn't even manage "show home" cleanliness and tidiness once a year, never mind 2 or 3 times! As long as there is no damp, a bit of dust and mess is absolutely ok.

One more request from me OP, please change your "name" on here, it isn't true, and thinking like that could lead you into a deep depression. You are a great and caring Mum - full stop. 💐💐💐

This 100%@Itwasafterallallaboutme …brilliant ! OP you really are a fabulous Mum and please change your username 💕💐

Original poster
Shithole101 · 28/10/2023 00:59

Londonlondon4 · 28/10/2023 00:49

Great job OP. You‘ve inspired me to blast through a room and get it properly cleared like these.

i posted earlier on adding a bookcase/display shelf. Will add that it is worth looking at online hacks to bring in colour. E.g. Google Billy Bookcase Hacks.

Ah that's great. Glad it helped you get going..I will definitely look at the billy book case hack . Ikea have lots of ideas I also need to see if I can get a z /folding bed for when GS stays over. I'm also going g tk put a pick on the small room so kids cut dump stuff in there.

OP posts:
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