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Bedrooms are trashed. Finding it hard see pics

175 replies

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 20:37

I have been through a really hard time which I hope is going in a better direction. I have to cope with things completely on my own with no support. Whilst supporting others . There's lots of mental health issues. Special needs. Vulnerability etc .

Anyway as I say some things are starting to get better. But the kids bedrooms are a shit hole . The kids are with their father this weekend so I'm trying to use the time to get things done. But I get tired and out of breath so quickly I get drained and don't get much done . I have just managed to do the 2 youngest kids room. I need to tidy /clean and take old bed apart in the spare room . And then put new double bed together for that room. I have to get it done tonight. Because my other son is coming over tomorrow to chat /company as he's struggling mentally so I don't want to do it whilst he's here .

So I'm drinking an energy drink in the hope it will help me stay awake till late /give me some energy

I have included pictures because I want to shame myself and motivate myself to get it done. I will add after pictures as well once done

Any ideas how the kids can keep it tidy ? In an easy to manage way. One child is autistic and forgets what he's doing. By the time he gets to his room . And then the younger one gets upset because he feels like it's on him.

OP posts:
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Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 21:14

Comedycook · 27/10/2023 21:11

Oh I was expecting much worse. That's totally sortable.

maybe a nice rug? A bean bag to sit on. do they have laundry basket for dirty clothes?

To keep kids rooms in some sort of order, I do a little five minute sweep every day. Bin bag to collect any rubbish. Shake out duvets. Pick up any dirty clothes etc

Their clothes are kept in my room. They also change in my room. I just want to concentrate on getting on top of things first. I can probably mane it feel mire of a kids room after Xmas.

OP posts:
Sandunesandseashells · 27/10/2023 21:16

They sell boxes which would fit in that furniture in B&Q if you have one closer than Ikea.

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 21:17

Wallywobbles · 27/10/2023 21:01

How about a shelving unit like kallax for dividing the room. With boxes in to make the bottom more solid.

Do you mean mean so they have their own space? Bit like a divider so they have their own room (sort of)

OP posts:
Scrunchcake · 27/10/2023 21:18

There's a book called How to Keep House While Drowning (by KC Davis) that you might find useful for ideas - either for yourself or your DC. It's good for lots of ND people, and a big emphasis on getting away from feeling ashamed about mess etc.

LittleBearPad · 27/10/2023 21:18

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 21:14

Their clothes are kept in my room. They also change in my room. I just want to concentrate on getting on top of things first. I can probably mane it feel mire of a kids room after Xmas.

It’s a really big room, why are their clothes in your room?

Depending how old they are, IKEA do good rugs for kids rooms, DS loves his one with roads on.

If you need enough stuff from IKEA the delivery charge becomes quite reasonable.

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 21:18

Sandunesandseashells · 27/10/2023 21:16

They sell boxes which would fit in that furniture in B&Q if you have one closer than Ikea.

Oh wow. I will look thank you

OP posts:
Sugargliderwombat · 27/10/2023 21:18

I think they need more storage. They need a big bin for their rubbish. Some big baskets for some other crap. I'd struggle to keep that room tidy there's nowhere to put anything!

Grumplechops · 27/10/2023 21:19

Also if you look on your local Facebook marketplace you might be able to find some trofast storage baskets. They’re really popular so there’s quite a good chance someone nearby might be selling them.

Gnomegnomegnome · 27/10/2023 21:24

You’ve done amazingly so far!

category12 · 27/10/2023 21:25

Because my other son is coming over tomorrow to chat /company as he's struggling mentally so I don't want to do it whilst he's here

Have you considered that maybe helping you with a project could be quite a constructive and bonding thing to do together?

Neveranynamesleft · 27/10/2023 21:25

Take a look on sites such as Freecycle or Freegle for things to help with the storage issues, people give allsorts of stuff away for free.

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 21:25

LittleBearPad · 27/10/2023 21:18

It’s a really big room, why are their clothes in your room?

Depending how old they are, IKEA do good rugs for kids rooms, DS loves his one with roads on.

If you need enough stuff from IKEA the delivery charge becomes quite reasonable.

Yeah I did get a larged delivery when I moved here. Which is not so bad paying out when it's lots . But I don't want to pay 50.00 delivery for a few little bits .

Their clothes are in my room because they do things like put 3 t shirts on keep changing etc and they ttash the clothes. So they stay in my room.

OP posts:
Autumn1990 · 27/10/2023 21:26

Argos and habitat do units similar to Kallax and delivery is much cheaper.

Aldicrispsareshit · 27/10/2023 21:26

category12 · 27/10/2023 21:25

Because my other son is coming over tomorrow to chat /company as he's struggling mentally so I don't want to do it whilst he's here

Have you considered that maybe helping you with a project could be quite a constructive and bonding thing to do together?

This. Get him building some new furniture/decorating the room with you and get talking. Guys generally open up more while they're occupied with a task.

Ellie1015 · 27/10/2023 21:28

That is an amazing amount of work you have done in the first room. I agree with others regular tidying by the kids as much as they can manage eg toys back in buckets, attempt at making bed.

For the second room do what you can but dont feel bad if not finished, son helping might be a good distraction and sometimes easier to talk while not sitting down expected to talk.

Woush · 27/10/2023 21:31

Their clothes are in my room because they do things like put 3 t shirts on keep changing etc and they ttash the clothes. So they stay in my room

Mmm. Removing personal responsibility and independence around dressing is infantalising them unnecessarily. It won't help.

If they change multiple times, just don't wash clothes they take off if not dirty - then no harm is done by it. Teach them to put clothes back in the drawers and take personal responsibility.

How old are the children?

I'd start with getting their clothes in their room. And a laundry basket.

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 21:36

Woush · 27/10/2023 21:31

Their clothes are in my room because they do things like put 3 t shirts on keep changing etc and they ttash the clothes. So they stay in my room

Mmm. Removing personal responsibility and independence around dressing is infantalising them unnecessarily. It won't help.

If they change multiple times, just don't wash clothes they take off if not dirty - then no harm is done by it. Teach them to put clothes back in the drawers and take personal responsibility.

How old are the children?

I'd start with getting their clothes in their room. And a laundry basket.

Edited

I'm doing what works best for me/us. I have had alot of stress I don't want to put things in the way to make it harder. Having clothes in my room makes it easier. Its not the end if the world.

OP posts:
Wetblanket78 · 27/10/2023 21:41

Kallax units are good for storage can never have too much storage. You could put one down the middle to give them their own space. We had these play tables when my were younger. Keeps stuff like Lego etc off the floor.

Bedrooms are trashed.  Finding it hard see pics
Wendysfriend · 27/10/2023 21:43

You have done a fantastic job on the 1st room. Well done and I bet it felt amazing standing back and seeing it done .

Regarding the second room, your son that is coming over tomorrow, would he be willing/able to help you build the bed ? That's a fairly big job.

There are some great suggestions here, however what is, if any, your budget on buying for storage etc ? I know those units etc are expensive.

I have 5 children, they're mostly grown now but they were all little once and my house felt like a toy shop and tip at times. I wasn't able to afford units from different stores , I use to have tons of the coloured boxes from Argos, I'm in Ireland and Argos are gone from here so I'm not sure if they still sell them. They were reasonably priced, held tons, they could be stacked if not overfilled, were fantastic for bits, figures, Lego, smaller toys, I always managed to fit in as much as possible, actually, IKEA do similar boxes, I know you can't get there but if you were ever to get the chance. You don't have to put these plastic boxes on units, they can sit on the floor until you are able to buy the units. I also used the big massive clear plastic storage boxes, I always found these brilliant, affordable and so, so handy to just throw things into. I also used , I can't remember the name of them but they were a tall plastic trolley with 3 big pull out drawers, I think they were advertised at the time for kitchens for holding vegetables, but I put toys, books, crafts into them, they also held small toys and the trolleys were in wheels so you could change them around the rooms easily, everyone had their own colour trolleys.

I remember trying to make the rooms feel nice, I think once the floor is clear, tidy and beds made the room looks much better. I remember cutting out characters from a colouring book one time and I stenciled them onto the walls, just drew around them and I had small paints from a child's craft set and used them to colour in the stencils I just drew on. It was temporary until I was able to afford proper units, proper paint etc

Oh and I used laundry baskets too for storage of toys , folded bed clothes, jumpers, shoes, some nice sturdy ones, some with lids. I got my kids at the time to colour their names onto A4 paper and I put that in an A4 plastic sleeve and I sellotaped it to their boxes, baskets etc

You're doing great, your kids will be delighted, when you have extra storage it's easier to keep tidy. Still to this day I have a big plastic container in most rooms and it's a quick tidy up just throwing things in, but try keep to samey things you're throwing in as it's a pain sorting and looking for stuff if it's all mixed up

Scottishskifun · 27/10/2023 21:45

Check out your local Facebook group would say the kallax or similar would work well they come up in my local area so might near you.

junbean · 27/10/2023 21:50

Every day have them pick up one category of items. Turn off the wifi and they get to have it back on when they're done to your satisfaction. For example today we're going to pick up clothes. Tomorrow will be organizing their books or toys.

Focusing on just one thing and removing distractions works for my DD who is ADHD and ASD. I do have to check in frequently and remind her to get back to business because she'll get distracted- I'll find her in the floor reading her books instead of putting them on the shelf.

Reward yourselves (you included) with something nice afterwards.

We find it really helpful to play music during this time as well.

elrider · 27/10/2023 21:54

IKEA delivery can be quite reasonable for smaller items. I think they changed it.

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 27/10/2023 21:54

Wallywobbles · 27/10/2023 21:01

How about a shelving unit like kallax for dividing the room. With boxes in to make the bottom more solid.

Kallax is a poor choice for room dividing because it can topple over. OP has children and they might try to climb it.

Elvarli post system would be safer if OP can locate the ceiling joist to attach it to.

Floor to Ceiling Storage - Floor to Ceiling Shelves

Visit IKEA to explore our floor to ceiling storage range, including floor to ceiling shelves and many more. Shop online or in-store today.

https://www.ikea.com/gb/en/cat/post-unit-combinations-35769

Imagwine · 27/10/2023 22:00

My kids had to tidy their room every Saturday ready for pocket money inspection. Their rooms didn’t stay tidy for long but at least they were tidy once a week and there is only so much mess you can make in one week.

Shithole101 · 27/10/2023 22:01

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 27/10/2023 21:54

Kallax is a poor choice for room dividing because it can topple over. OP has children and they might try to climb it.

Elvarli post system would be safer if OP can locate the ceiling joist to attach it to.

I'm not planning on dividing the room. The smaller room that I showed is a spare room. So one child would go on there if they had their own rooms .

OP posts:
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