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Original poster

What form has your midlife crisis taken?

149 replies

Foodorder · 27/10/2023 17:27

What odd decisions or big changes have you made?

I think I've had 2. At 40 I very nearly had an affair. I did the right thing and walked away eventually, but it brought about quite a lot of change in my life as I realised what actually made me tick, rather than what I'd always accepted/been told I wanted from life.

In my early 50s I've suddenly become adventurous and impulsive, in my clothes, my work, travel, doing loads of things I wouldn't have dreamt I was capable of.

OP posts:
Flamintula · 27/10/2023 21:12

I was on the cusp of 40, which apparently classic. I had an affair. Got caught. Nearly blew my entire life apart.
Worked through it with dh. Took up hobbies.

whatsthatinyourhand · 27/10/2023 21:18

At 53 I left my husband of 26 years, moved countries to somewhere I'd never lived before. And I think, don't like to jinx it, but, I think I've found happiness. It truly is the best thing in the world to be happy in one's own skin.

Blazingunicorns · 27/10/2023 21:19

Lost 4 stone, vowed to have better sex. Which I am 😁

MotherOfVizslas · 27/10/2023 21:21

I'm currently learning to play the electric guitar🤣

Myhouseisaspiderhotel · 27/10/2023 21:25

Retraining in 40s.
Wearing whatever the fuck I want.
Being more confident.
Told a so-called friend to fuck off when she was being a complete twat. Really glad I said it.
Not willing to put up with other people's crap.

TokyoSushi · 27/10/2023 21:31

I've just ordered a White Fox hoodie after seeing a school trip of teenagers all wearing them in the airport while I was on a business trip this week. I think they were Y11, I'm 44!

OnlyTheBravest · 27/10/2023 21:36

Not sure I would call mine a crisis as opposed to an awakening and awareness that I never had before.
Purged my life of whatless people and the drama that follows them,
Gave up well paid career, retrained as a teacher- hated it and moved into tech role instead. I get to WFH and amongst adults with far less office dramas,
Explored my interests/hobbies,
Travelled more,
Wear what makes me comfortable,
I give far less shits than before and sometimes I am not the bigger person.

I am extremely happy!

Resisterance · 27/10/2023 21:37

Massive existential meltdown!

Started a masters, closed my company, taking HRT, alternately partying or exhausted, fed up of having but lost my lockdown weight, permanently ill it seems, not enough sex.

Resisterance · 27/10/2023 21:40

Not lost my lockdown weight that should say!

AnneLovesGilbert · 27/10/2023 21:41

I’ve had a baby (maybe that was something) so no time to question anything but I might get another piercing if I get future midlife jitters.

DJSteves · 27/10/2023 21:43

At the ripe old age of 47 I've just moved continents

TrustPenguins · 27/10/2023 21:44

Went back to uni to do a Masters and change career. One of the best things I've ever done.

Heyhoherewegoagain · 27/10/2023 21:50

Had weightloss surgery and lost over 50% of my starting weight, which has led to massive improvements in mental and physical health, and rediscovering my confidence in my abilities…I stopped being a people
pleaser, don’t do anything I don’t want to do, I stand up for myself in my workplace way more than I ever did, and I got 8 extra piercings .

I LOVE my 50s!Grin

Londontown12 · 27/10/2023 21:51

Dumped my so called best after I found out she had been talking about me behind my back ! She doesn’t know that I know !
Didn’t say anything just ghosted her then blocked her on everything she has not once reached out !!
so I know I did the right thing known her for 27 years !
I have quit smoking and I’m now on my weight loss journey !
I have had a few hard years like most woman in midlife ! Covid pandemic peri menopause diagnosed with autoimmune disease!
But I’m on it I’m loving this thread !

MrsRandom123 · 27/10/2023 21:56

We’re buying a new house! Finally. It’s a smaller house than here & will cost us 7 years more on to our mortgage but if we don’t do it now we never will!

NoraLuka · 27/10/2023 22:11

Darklane · 27/10/2023 20:10

Seriously many times considered what it would be like to walk into one of the deep, dark, cold, remote, lonely reservoirs on the moors where I live & walk my little dogs.

Do you have anyone in RL to talk to ? Please reach out to the Samaritans if you don’t xx

My midlife crisis is a work in progress and a collection of stereotypes.

I’ve trained for a half marathon and found out the hard way you can’t just suddenly double your weekly running distance at the age of 40 without any consequences. I’m still going to do a half marathon if my body will go along with it, but it will be next year now.

Also did my CBT and bought a 125cc motorbike and love it while at the same time being terrified that it’s irresponsible etc. The others doing the training course were all blokes in their 20s and they didn’t feel this way at all!

I seriously considered leaving DP but I’m still with him because I’m not sure what the right decision is. I don’t go a day without wondering what I should do.

Also went to a couple of festivals this summer and went right to the front next to the stage a couple of times, and did the whole glittery face paint thing. Also went through a phase of going out and getting too drunk but that only lasted a few weeks because I didn’t recognise myself at all.

Myfabby · 27/10/2023 22:13

Darklane · 27/10/2023 20:10

Seriously many times considered what it would be like to walk into one of the deep, dark, cold, remote, lonely reservoirs on the moors where I live & walk my little dogs.

Please ring someone. Or chat

https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/chat-online/

It won't always be this dark I promise you.

Chat with us online

If calling isn't for you, in the future, you’ll be able to use our live online chat service to talk to a Samaritan in real time.

https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/chat-online

PrincessHoneysuckle · 27/10/2023 22:17

Not mid life crisis as such yet but I give less fucks since 40.and I have no problem saying how i feel and saying no to people.
I want to be fitter and eat better as I'm 43 and a half now.

florisse · 27/10/2023 22:17

Got a tattoo. Generally don't give a shit. Worked out that midlife crisis is just doing stuff you've always wanted to do - but realise now that no one cares and even if they did, you don't! So you might as well just do the thing.

PrincessHoneysuckle · 27/10/2023 22:23

florisse · 27/10/2023 22:17

Got a tattoo. Generally don't give a shit. Worked out that midlife crisis is just doing stuff you've always wanted to do - but realise now that no one cares and even if they did, you don't! So you might as well just do the thing.

Yes!

LightSpeeds · 27/10/2023 22:25

Just chucked my job in with no other job to go to.

Mirabai · 27/10/2023 22:27

Currently half way through 8 years of complete retrain. New friends. New perspective.

Flamingo68 · 27/10/2023 22:28

Age 37. I have had 4 tattoos in the last two years. Never had any before. Two are Taylor Swift related, and I intend to get a tattoo for each of her ten albums on my arm. Oh and I spent about £1500 on tickets to see her next year. I do not regret a thing.

mymidlife · 27/10/2023 22:33

Oh fun thread! Deserved a name change.

I've had an entire half sleeve tattoo over the last ten months. And I come across quite reserved and posh so that's fun Grin

TheHoover · 27/10/2023 22:33

Weightlifting. I’ve not lost any weight but I’m strong as a fucking ox