Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Well. Here we are.

140 replies

Fordian · 30/09/2023 23:45

Right now, after 19 years, I'm bowing out of MN.

I've dipped in and out, many names, banned once for suggesting kids with severe educational problems won't make great health care professionals; iCod etc etc.

But. Seriously. It's now like Twitter with vibes.

I wish you well. And am sorry you didn't get to experience MN at its best 10-15 years ago.

OP posts:
FlopsSake · 01/10/2023 00:50

The platform has merely evolved. Embrace the change and go with the flow.

SerpentEndBench · 01/10/2023 00:50

I didn't understand the Twitter for wimmin quip but never mind.

I hope you're okay Fordian, take care mate.

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 01/10/2023 00:52

Been here since 2003. MN has changed, but still a good resource. It's bigger, which can be a good (more opinions/ intelligence, less cliquey) or a bad thing (less personal) but its what you want to take from it. My dc are pretty much grown, but I still find lots of relevant threads on here. Maybe the OP has had a bad experience (it happens, I do sometimes cringe at some posts attacking)
I would like to see people being a bit kinder, tbh

BabyFireflyx · 01/10/2023 03:22

People are dicks. That's the real pandemic. It's few and far between sometimes having one or more poster trying to support you and really understand. I don't blame you.

lljkk · 01/10/2023 04:21

er, there was toxicity when I joined in 2002.

The arguments about Gina Ford. omg.
Sense of humour dominated though, even then, rather than this hyper earnestness & morality strangulations, that has led to the TERF wars & MN campaigns etc.

My Twitter feed used to very very funny preMusk & now it's just plain boring. Not toxic. It's really easy on Twitter (X) to avoid toxicity. Much harder to avoid on MN, hard to curate feed here.

Go to reddit, OP.

Californiabound · 01/10/2023 04:48

I do remember that night when mouldies was unveiled, that was funny. It was better in the past, sadly all gone
What can you do. It was very cliquey, but then again I, just used to read, not get involved.

Californiabound · 01/10/2023 04:53

There's no humour now, everyone seems to have a giant stick up their arse.

Valerianandfoxglovesoup · 01/10/2023 05:00

I think it's much better. Used to be the same people posting the same hostile crap on every thread, I'm so glad they have gone. They really took the piss

echt · 01/10/2023 05:08

Well I've been here under this username since about 2006.

Yes it was very cliquey indeed, but more intelligent and humorous.

There are still very pleasant threads: Archers, Gardening, Gransnet and it's still a mine of information on specialist. subjects.

Lastchancechica · 01/10/2023 05:33

I remember the packs of mean posters, that would lynch others en masse, I don’t know how MN stopped that but they did. It’s much better now.

The disrespectful use of the word ‘wimmin’ has a very surprising misogynist tone that makes me question you op.

exLtEveDallas · 01/10/2023 05:47

There are still a lot of posters around that have been here since the start, problem is most of them regularly name change. Whilst I understand it, sometimes I wish they didn't, as I like seeing names I knew, posters with a style I recognised. (I think I've had this name since 2014ish, but I don't post anywhere near as much as I did).

However it did lead to 'quiches' and 'royalty' which pissed a lot of people off. MN has changed, undoubtedly, but it's not all bad, and it's certainly nothing like Twitter.

RenegadeMasterx · 01/10/2023 05:51

My MN is nothing like my X feed... buuuut ok.

CurlewKate · 01/10/2023 06:04

I was here 20 years ago. Stopped for a while-been back about a year. I agree that it's changed-it's much bigger, so fewer personal connections. And so much more right wing and depressingly anti feminist in a "what about the men" way. But still lots of interesting discussions and lots of fun. I'm delighted that people don't seem to "literally cry with laughter" or "spit their tea over their keyboard" any more!

Donotshushme · 01/10/2023 06:17

banned once for suggesting kids with severe educational problems won't make great health care professionals

One less disablist prick - good. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

I was here back in the day and it wasn't some golden age. It was the same as it was now, just with more cliques.

GarlicGrace · 01/10/2023 06:26

More cliques and more humour, though! Swings, roundabouts ... <shuffles back to 2008 and re-starts war with the Queen of Feminism> <thinks better of that, makes coffee instead>

AliciaLime · 01/10/2023 06:30

lljkk · 01/10/2023 04:21

er, there was toxicity when I joined in 2002.

The arguments about Gina Ford. omg.
Sense of humour dominated though, even then, rather than this hyper earnestness & morality strangulations, that has led to the TERF wars & MN campaigns etc.

My Twitter feed used to very very funny preMusk & now it's just plain boring. Not toxic. It's really easy on Twitter (X) to avoid toxicity. Much harder to avoid on MN, hard to curate feed here.

Go to reddit, OP.

Ha ha - you named her! Shock

GarlicGrace · 01/10/2023 06:31

AliciaLime · 01/10/2023 06:30

Ha ha - you named her! Shock

Show quote history

😂😂

SupportAnimalShelters · 01/10/2023 06:45

The reason sites like this were better 20-25 years ago is that they were smaller and you could really get to know other posters. There were real online relationships. That's much harder now that almost everyone is online and people are (rightly) more reserved on sites. In my opinion anyway, for what that is worth. This is still a good place to get information but I don't find it as relational. People are also not as kind as they used to be.

GoodOldEmmaNess · 01/10/2023 06:56

Completely agree that the style of posting that people adopt on Twitter has made it over here and changed the nature of MN threads.

The 'Twitter vibe' is 'have your say'. Get that quick little rush from communicating something that makes you feel angry or clever, put your little paper boat out into an ocean where it will appear as a fragment in different timelines, with different posts around it.

The MN vibe is 'talk to each other'. Words on MN are meant to appear as part of a conversation, they are anchored to the fixed context of a particular thread. They are meant to be a response to previous posts and an invitation to others to respond further.

But I don't really see much actual conversation here anymore, just lots of one-off communications.

Returning here from Twitter, although I tried to hose off most of Elon's musk and the general cesspit residue of twitter shitstorms, I find it hard not to just throw out angry little missiles of my own, unintentionally doing my bit to make everything on MN worse.

I know I should RTFT but it rarely seems worth it now: Reading back through a thread just feels like reading back through a timeline. Fractured.

letstrythatagain · 01/10/2023 07:55

Donotshushme · 01/10/2023 06:17

banned once for suggesting kids with severe educational problems won't make great health care professionals

One less disablist prick - good. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

I was here back in the day and it wasn't some golden age. It was the same as it was now, just with more cliques.

🙄🙄

Quirrelsotherface · 01/10/2023 07:59

Agree with a previous poster, I was here 10-15 years ago and it was horribly cliquey.
I enjoyed it then but there were lots of in-jokes and threads I didn't understand because of it.

Much prefer it now, more inclusive and interesting.

BakewellGin1 · 01/10/2023 07:59

I've been here since approx 2007/2008 (before oldest was born I know for definate) have changed usernames since.

I don't get involved and never have in any cliques but have been around since then and gained some good advice along the way.

Plonkydonkey · 01/10/2023 07:59

Is this going to be like one of those protracted comedy death scenes. Lots of angst, wheeeeeezing, small pointed statements, a few splutters. More statements... A glassy eyed look into the mn distance... A few more mutters...
😱😀😀

Strawberrywalnutcake · 01/10/2023 08:02

It’s not as funny now and posters seem angrier than before but that reflects how life has changed in the last 6/7 years I think.

I took a mn break over the summer and actually read some books. Recommend it op.

hopeishere · 01/10/2023 08:05

I think if you think your x feed is like what's on mumsnet YOU need to look at both who you're following and the threads you click on. It's a choice.