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That World Cup kiss

331 replies

mids2019 · 26/08/2023 08:03

The news about the world cup is being dominated by an unsolicited kiss on the lips on a Spanish player. I do not want to condone the rather bizarre and overly personal celebration of the head of Spanish football (idiot) but I do feel the whole matter has drawn focus away from the football on the pitch and made the hugely successful world cup a feminist issue where discussions are now revolving around appropriate behaviour between men and women rather than the actual sport.

Young girl players instead of looking up to the heroic exploits of our players are now getting drawn into much more general discussions about personal limits and what constitutes assault. I think this is all a pity really.

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6
tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 26/08/2023 11:04

WhatapityWapiti · 26/08/2023 10:27

It’s a huge shame that the action of a pervy man is tainting what should be a euphoric time for Jenni Hermoso, winning the World Cup. Her abiding memory will be being assaulted and branded a liar. Well done chaps.

This

TooOldForThisNonsense · 26/08/2023 11:05

He’s a dirty, entitled fucker and his doubling down has made it even worse. He grabbed her head and kissed her on the lips. I only consent to being kissed on the lips by my husband. No other male. Not my dad, not my teenage sons. It’s an intimate act and wholly inappropriate to do that without consent

anotherside · 26/08/2023 11:05

but I do feel the whole matter has drawn focus away from the football on the pitch and made the hugely successful world cup a feminist issue where discussions are now revolving around appropriate behaviour between men and women rather than the actual sport

Women’s football isn’t actually that popular - yet. As for the women’sWorld Cup specifically, it’s at the stage where it was watched by millions and hyped by the countries with a decent shot of winning the thing - England, the US, Japan, Australia, three or four other European nations - but was not really a “Big Event” for 90% of the planet. So the hype would have pretty much faded by now anyway.

However, it was big enough to amplify the coverage of the behaviour of the dickhead in question. Which is definitely a good thing, as it may continue to pressure some men out of their entitled behviour and mindset.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 26/08/2023 11:06

Natty13 · 26/08/2023 10:31

Very interesting that a lot of posters who are all over threads about "Karens" complaining it's misogynistic and a term used to silence women are also on here effectively saying a woman being forcably kissed by her manager needs to put up and shut up 🤔

Actually, the only poster I've seen on both threads is an apologist for sexual abuse on this one, and for misogynist slurs on the other.

anotherside · 26/08/2023 11:07

It’s a huge shame that the action of a pervy man is tainting what should be a euphoric time for Jenni Hermoso, winning the World Cup. Her abiding memory will be being assaulted and branded a liar. Well done chaps

Which is all the more reason for women’s football to not let this go and to push it until he resigns and Spanish football issues a sincere apology. I’d say they have 90% of the female AND male general public firmly on their side.

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 11:08

Zonder · 26/08/2023 10:47

Are you saying that the Spanish lady who posted is wrong then? I've not had the same experience as you in Spain and googling would also support the Spanish poster over you. Perhaps you have some odd friends who take the mickey!

And are you also saying that it doesn't matter if the woman doesn't want it?

Edited

Yes as previously stated , there are regional differences. Some areas kiss on one cheek , some do both , some hug , some don't, and some kiss on the lips. Certainly in my area men and women if they are familiar kiss on the lips, it happens ....

I don't think it's right that this is deflecting from their achievements

anotherside · 26/08/2023 11:11

If the prick had just apologised the next day and maybe said he’ll do some reading about consent/apprororate boundaires or spoken to some female colleagues about the issue, this would have blown over in a day or two.

Instead he not only doubled down, but also started making shit up. He really seems a Grade A asshole.

ZenNudist · 26/08/2023 11:12

There has to be more to it than the kiss. I don't know why they don't say if it's the straw that broke the camels back because the actual celebration kiss doesn't look like assault in context. Totally different if your boss grabs you in a normal office job even socially. I'm not a male apologist but the story makes no sense just looking at the footage.

Zonder · 26/08/2023 11:13

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 11:08

Yes as previously stated , there are regional differences. Some areas kiss on one cheek , some do both , some hug , some don't, and some kiss on the lips. Certainly in my area men and women if they are familiar kiss on the lips, it happens ....

I don't think it's right that this is deflecting from their achievements

So rather than "deflect from their achievements" you would prefer women just put up and shut up? Got it!

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 26/08/2023 11:13

It hasn't deflected from their achievements for me AT ALL.

What I will also remember from an incredible World Cup now is his sleazy behaviour and the attitudes of the Spanish FA and their actions.

Talipesmum · 26/08/2023 11:13

but I do feel the whole matter has drawn focus away from the football on the pitch and made the hugely successful world cup a feminist issue where discussions are now revolving around appropriate behaviour between men and women rather than the actual sport

Yes, it’s a huge shame. And this is ENTIRELY the fault of the Spanish FA and their leader. Not the media, definitely not the Spanish players.

Everyone would absolutely love for women’s football to be entirely about the game, the sport. But when the players are treated like this - not “just” this incident but the whole history of how the Spanish FA has been so disrespectful, sexist and misogynistic to their female player - it shows how much more there is to be done to enable us to get to the point where the sport alone can shine.

And it’s not just “appropriate behaviour between men and women” - it’s about the position of power these men have over the women as well. They own their careers. And despite the women being SO excellent, they are also required to accept utterly unacceptable behaviour from their leadership.

The players can’t separate the game from the misogyny. They have no choice at the moment. That’s why they’re fighting back.

7eleven · 26/08/2023 11:15

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 26/08/2023 11:06

Actually, the only poster I've seen on both threads is an apologist for sexual abuse on this one, and for misogynist slurs on the other.

Quite. That poster needs to put themself in the bin.

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 11:17

Zonder · 26/08/2023 11:13

So rather than "deflect from their achievements" you would prefer women just put up and shut up? Got it!

As far as I am aware she hasn't put a complaint in. Its other people. That may be wrong of course and perhaps she has. But as far as I am aware she was asked if the kiss was consensual, she laughed and said not exactly but it's fine .... and continues to talk about the win

anotherside · 26/08/2023 11:18

@Maddy70

I don't think it's right that this is deflecting from their achievements

Its deflecting from the football because the man in question doubled down and started making stuff up, rather than issue a sincere apology to her and admitting fault. Even in the context of the woman in question having said clear as day that he had overstepped.

If some girls are now watching this play out on the news that’s a good thing IMO, as most of them will probably encounter this sort of situation/behaviour at some point.

DuncinToffee · 26/08/2023 11:19

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 11:17

As far as I am aware she hasn't put a complaint in. Its other people. That may be wrong of course and perhaps she has. But as far as I am aware she was asked if the kiss was consensual, she laughed and said not exactly but it's fine .... and continues to talk about the win

https://twitter.com/Jennihermoso/status/1695155154067087413?s=20

Official Announcement. August 25th,2023.

anotherside · 26/08/2023 11:19

@Maddy70

But as far as I am aware she was asked if the kiss was consensual, she laughed and said not exactly but it's fine .... and continues to talk about the win

No, now she’s talking about how the Spanish Footbakl Federation is making up quotes in an attempt to contradict/whitewash her original remark made in the dressing room. She does not sound happy about it at all.

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 26/08/2023 11:20

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 26/08/2023 11:06

Actually, the only poster I've seen on both threads is an apologist for sexual abuse on this one, and for misogynist slurs on the other.

Actually just spotted another one. So, yes, all over this thread saying that the man's abusive behaviour is OK, and on the other one saying there's nothing wrong with calling a woman a Karen.

WhenIWasAFieldMyself · 26/08/2023 11:22

Maddy70 · 26/08/2023 11:17

As far as I am aware she hasn't put a complaint in. Its other people. That may be wrong of course and perhaps she has. But as far as I am aware she was asked if the kiss was consensual, she laughed and said not exactly but it's fine .... and continues to talk about the win

That often happens. Women who've been abused by men don't want to/daren't be the ones to report the abuse.
Thankfully, in this case, it was seen by millions (as have many of his other moments of inappropriate touching and groping of women) so the images can speak for her.

crumpet · 26/08/2023 11:23

mids2019 · 26/08/2023 08:03

The news about the world cup is being dominated by an unsolicited kiss on the lips on a Spanish player. I do not want to condone the rather bizarre and overly personal celebration of the head of Spanish football (idiot) but I do feel the whole matter has drawn focus away from the football on the pitch and made the hugely successful world cup a feminist issue where discussions are now revolving around appropriate behaviour between men and women rather than the actual sport.

Young girl players instead of looking up to the heroic exploits of our players are now getting drawn into much more general discussions about personal limits and what constitutes assault. I think this is all a pity really.

I disagree. The kiss was the visible tip of the ice berg of the situation not only the Spanish team had been facing (in late 202215 of them wrote to say they refused to play in the World Cup due to the conditions they had to endure, of which only 3 of them actually played). The build up to and the matches were tinged with mutterings of the problems in the Spanish camp, and as it stands 81 player have now refused to play for the Spanish team unless things are resolved.

yes of course it’s a pity that this is a dominant conversation but it’s not of the women’s making. This is all down to the Spanish FA.

IClaudine · 26/08/2023 11:25

I think it is absolutely abhorrent that one poster is trying to twist the truth of what Hermanos has actually said. Why would a person do that?

NotMadeOfStone · 26/08/2023 11:29

Even his defence is shite.

"I asked her if I could give her a little peck and she said ok."

  1. Why ask? You'd never try that on a man.
  2. Did you fuck ask.
  3. How could she have said no?!
  4. Get fucked.
maltravers · 26/08/2023 11:47

I think this one poster has a problem generally with feminism and women asserting their boundaries.

willWillSmithsmith · 26/08/2023 11:51

I don’t follow any football so have only just learnt that he actually kissed her on the lips! That’s truly shocking and I think he deserves every backlash he hopefully gets. Good for Jennie for not letting this go!

7eleven · 26/08/2023 11:55

@saffronsoup have you heard of the concept of CONSENT?