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My dh hasn’t paid the rent ffs

836 replies

RentNotPaid · 10/08/2023 09:33

Soo I’ve just had a call from our letting agent went to voicemail as I was on a call and my fucking husband hasn’t paid the rent for the last 2 months….

The bastard is at work and his phone has been switched off

I don’t have the money to pay it all - I did wonder why he had some extra money

We have separate accounts he pays rent etc I pay other bills it all works out fair

I am so bloody angry I daren’t phone the letting agent back and I’m off to check his emails 😡😡😡

OP posts:
GuinnessBird · 10/08/2023 11:54

I wouldn't have paid anything until speaking to DH.

I'm sure that it will get resolved but constantly trying to call him isn't helping.

Rewis · 10/08/2023 11:55

Stop calling to his work, I'm sure the receptionist will tell him to call you once he's free. You don't want to cause trouble for him at work and more work for the receptionist. Also don't sent random amounts of money unless it is agreed with the letting agent.

There is a solid chance that there is an innocent human error either on your husbands side or the agency. "My hsuannd usually handles rent and he's in a meeting currently but we'll get back to you immediately when I've reached him" that's all the letting agent needs at this moment. And if it turns out your husband has used the money for ponies then it's time to panic. If it turns out it was just an error I'm sure everyone will understand if it's not a pattern.

edwinbear · 10/08/2023 11:55

OP they are not going to evict you today, obviously it's stressful, but you really need to just wait and speak to your DH. I wouldn't have sent any money either until I knew exactly what was going on.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Mmhmmn · 10/08/2023 11:57

Surely it's just an oversight.

drivinmecrazy · 10/08/2023 11:58

My DH goes through his statements about every six moths.
I dread those days cos he'll suddenly ask me to account for a random £6.14 transaction four months ago.
Luckily plonking a glass of wine in front of him placates him.
Sorry that's not helpful, but hopefully it's an oversight.
Desperately hoping OP and DH will be able to laugh at this by the end of the day 💐

LostThestral · 10/08/2023 12:00

I think it sounds like a mistake. I think the best option is to tell the letting agent your husband is in a meeting & you will resolve what you think is likely to be a mistake & come back to them before end of play tomorrow.

Does your husband earn the same amount each month OP? I honestly wouldn't notice is a payment hadn't come out of my account as my salary is commission based & varies every month, you said he has just had a pay rise so has maybe assumed he has extra because of this

Bournetilly · 10/08/2023 12:03

I think you need to calm down!
You shouldn’t of sent the £1000, if it’s a mistake it will be a nightmare to get back. Why not just wait and speak to your DH? He will be out the meeting soon/ at some point today. Just wait and see what he says, hopefully it’s a mistake and he has the money in his account.
Id stop calling the receptionist, he will see your missed calls once he’s out his meeting and it only looks bad on him ringing more than once.

emark · 10/08/2023 12:03

A section 8 isn't instant, a landlord needs to apply to court for possession using arrears as part of section 8 grounds.
There must also be over 8 weeks of arrears on day of court hearing

RentNotPaid · 10/08/2023 12:04

As far as I am aware he gets paid, sends the bills money to his bills accounts and all the bills go out, what’s left is his spending money/food/fuel for the month, he does it the same way as me as he’s the one who told me how to do it as I missed bills etc it’s been the same for 10 years now.

In our nearly 20 year relationship nothing like this has happened before ever.

He’s read my messages now so I am expecting a phone call shortly.

OP posts:
HurdyGurdy19 · 10/08/2023 12:06

Many many years ago, early on in our marriage, our mortgage didn't get paid one month. It was paid from my husband's account.

When I asked him what happened to the mortgage money, his exact words were "it just got frittered away".

That was our first major row, and I took over all our finances immediately. Both wages went into my account, and he got pocket money. No cheque book or credit card. Just cash.

Couldn't have cared less if he felt humiliated, or that I was treating him like a child. I'd rather that than find myself at the side of the road with my belongings in boxes.

TheShellBeach · 10/08/2023 12:07

In our nearly 20 year relationship nothing like this has happened before ever

In that case, OP, take a deep breath and wait for his explanation. It doesn't sounds like he's suddenly started gambling or paying for something seedy online.

I bet there's an innocent explanation.

Your landlord will not want the aggravation of evicting you if this is unusual on your behalf. Taking tenants to court is a PITA.

Calm down.

LondonLovie · 10/08/2023 12:08

Rewis · 10/08/2023 11:55

Stop calling to his work, I'm sure the receptionist will tell him to call you once he's free. You don't want to cause trouble for him at work and more work for the receptionist. Also don't sent random amounts of money unless it is agreed with the letting agent.

There is a solid chance that there is an innocent human error either on your husbands side or the agency. "My hsuannd usually handles rent and he's in a meeting currently but we'll get back to you immediately when I've reached him" that's all the letting agent needs at this moment. And if it turns out your husband has used the money for ponies then it's time to panic. If it turns out it was just an error I'm sure everyone will understand if it's not a pattern.

This. Might be better to remain calm, wait to speak to him (before stressing yourself with random people on MN who will likely jump to conclusions about gambling.. woops, too late!) and then assess the best way forward. Deep breath.

thedancingbear · 10/08/2023 12:09

Christ. Just imagine getting this worked up about what looks like an administrative oversight.

If it turns out the money has gone on smack and prostitutes, then of course the OP can/should go ballistic.

Igmum · 10/08/2023 12:10

Fingers crossed for you OP. Hopefully it's a mistake not spotted because of the hospital stay.

theyareonlynoodlesmichael · 10/08/2023 12:10

Realistic: This is some kind of banking fuck up

Worse case: Gambling etc

OP - I am confident its the first!

Mummyoflittledragon · 10/08/2023 12:11

thedancingbear · 10/08/2023 12:09

Christ. Just imagine getting this worked up about what looks like an administrative oversight.

If it turns out the money has gone on smack and prostitutes, then of course the OP can/should go ballistic.

I’m a landlord and can well understand the panic. I assure you there are some horrid landlords and letting agents out there. I’ve read enough threads on here and comments on FB.

Star0Fire · 10/08/2023 12:12

I'm sure it will be a mistake! You'll hear from him very soon

andymary · 10/08/2023 12:14

GCSister · 10/08/2023 11:35

That's not true. It will just go out on the next working day.

It is true, it happened, for me and my bank account anyway. It happened multiple times over a 5-6 year period when the standing order would fall on a weekend. It didn't auto adjust to the Monday or following next working day either, it just failed to complete the standing order.

MissJoGrant · 10/08/2023 12:14

WunWun · 10/08/2023 11:30

Unless he is loaded it is EXTREMELY unlikely that he doesn't know he hasn't paid the rent.

No it isn't. Capital letters don't make you right. There could be many innocent reasons (as outlined above by PP) or nefarious ones. It's impossible to tell at this point.

RentNotPaid · 10/08/2023 12:14

@thedancingbear

Hardly a fun morning I can assure you!

And yes I am in a panic - I can’t contact my dh and the phone call from the letting agent was very upsetting to be honest finding this all out has stressed me out considerably & they have yet to contact me back

OP posts:
Oysterbabe · 10/08/2023 12:14

You've done the right thing by getting the arrears under 2 months, they won't serve a section 8 now.
I hope you can get this sorted and they let you stay. Some landlords I deal with have a zero tolerance approach and will serve a section 21 as soon as there's any issue with rent payments.

RentNotPaid · 10/08/2023 12:14

The bastard still hasn’t called me

OP posts:
ssd · 10/08/2023 12:15

Well I'm a worrier and what with him being in hospital twice recently,being a lot older than you and forgetting to pay the rent twice, I'd be worrying about his memory.

BlastedIce · 10/08/2023 12:15

thedancingbear · 10/08/2023 12:09

Christ. Just imagine getting this worked up about what looks like an administrative oversight.

If it turns out the money has gone on smack and prostitutes, then of course the OP can/should go ballistic.

Exactly this! Honestly some people want him hung before they know what’s actually happened!

Busubaba · 10/08/2023 12:16

RentNotPaid · 10/08/2023 12:14

The bastard still hasn’t called me

He could be on the phone to his bank which we all know is a pain in the arse and time consuming.

I'm only getting 'good man' vibes about him so far and I hope I'm right.