Your stage of parenting at 40

[Isthistherealworldisthisjustfantasy]

Where are you at?
How do you feel about it?

I'm 40 and have a young family. I had my last baby last year. Still breastfeeding.

In my mind, I feel like I'm late 20s/early 30s and my stage of parenting kind of fits in with this delusion.

A few days ago, a father and son were on Instagram. The dad was 41 and the son was a big strapping 22 year old man, and at first, my husband (who is 41) was a bit discombobulated. I reminded him that we are old enough to not just have adult children, but grandchildren too. We sat there with our minds blowing. We do understand the maths, obviously, but we feel in such a different stage of life to our biological ages.

We started talking about how a woman has quite a long season where she can potentially get pregnant. I just saw on the news that Natasha Hamilton, who is 41, is pregnant, and I had a moment of feeling a pang of envy before I reminded myself that while I'd love another child, we are stopping at the 3 we have. I know that lots of 40 year old women would be horrified at the thought of pregnancy as their children are teens or adults.

Anyway, I think around 40 is a unique period of time in a woman's life where she can technically be a grandmother and still get pregnant and I was wondering where you all are by 40!

How old are your kids? Have you any grandchildren? Did you have all of your kids when you were young, spread over time or not until later? How would you feel if you got pregnant now? How would you feel if you became a grandmother now? Has anyone experienced both at the same time?

When I was I had a 15 year old and 12 year old and definitely my years of having babies! Married 17 years and been with dh for 23.

*when i was 40

42 with a 19 and 22 year old, soon to be granny

I was a new mum at 40 and my little sister was a grandmother of 3. I'm 53 now, with a 14 and an 8 year old, post-menopausal and loving it.

Not quite 40, I’m 38 and have an almost 5 year old and a one month old :)

I had my first at 39, 2nd at 40 and 3rd at 43, after 9 years ttc so my preference would have been to have them younger but delighted to have 3 kids. I do though honestly prefer it at this end rather than age 16-20. I got to go to college and had the time of my life travelling the world in my 20s and 30s. No matter what will never be so carefree again!!

At 40 I'll have 2 18 year olds, a 15 year old and a 12 year old. I'm currently 35 so only just entering the teenage years, the next 5 years are gonna be hard that's for sure 😂😩

At 40, I had kids aged 16, 15, and 13.
glad I had them young x

At 40 mine will be 17, 14, 4 and 3.

If I had my time again I'd have left less of a gap between the older two and younger two. It has been like starting all over again and parenting babies and toddlers is easier when you actually have energy.

My oldest will be 22, and youngest 20 when I'm 40

Hi, interesting how different are peoples point of view :)
I had my first with 23, second with 33. They have 10 years gap and I love it.

I had just landed the job of my dreams after I have up same type of job when I had to stop working to have the first one, so I am literally restarting my life now with 44, good money - not rich- buying my second house and living the dream.

I would never think about having more than 2 children, let alone after all this time and now that my children are quite independent, don’t need me too much any more and I can do whatever I want I wouldn’t think or envy anyone having children after 40.

I think that after 40 you can still have some energy left -if you are lucky enough -to waste with the kids that you already have without being exhausted or every holiday become a nightmare instead of time to relax, if you know what I mean. But there are many woman out there that likes to be pregnant and have the house full, make dinner for 10 etc, which is not my case. Hehe so I am happy with the life I chose :) xxx

Grandmother at 38, great Grandmother to two boys at 60 and loving it

At 40 I had a 3 and 5 years old. Fun times 😅

I’m 41 (42 in a few weeks) and have a 20 year old (about to turn 21) son and a 19 year old (about to turn 20) daughter. Just in case your trying to work it out there are 13 months between then.
No grandkids as son is asd and daughter has no desires for ‘that type of nonsense’ 😂

I'm 36 partner has is 40, we have a 6 Yr old and a 4 year. I don't think I want any more children and don't think that will change at 40!
My mother was distraught at becoming a grandmother at 54 though as she still felt that she was too young to have a 30 year old 😂😂 (she loved DD but hated being called 'nan' etc!)

Haha by the way
40 becoming a grandmother ? I hope not,
I will go for world tour if this happens lol

I'm 40 now, my DD is not quite 7. We don't plan on anymore, DP is several years older than me, but we're both happy being parents to a young child at our age.

I’m almost 39. I have a 13 year old, 4 year old and am newly trying to conceive another (contraception removed 9 weeks ago and cycle not returned to normal yet).
I absolutely do not feel too old for this. But I do know that biologically time is against me.
at my age my mum had a 20 year old, an 18 year old and a 15 year old. She was only 5 years from being a grandma. My cousin same age as me has an 18 year old and was horrified that I wanted another! 😂
I wish I’d had the third earlier, closer to my second. But my partner wasn’t ready. (My second is his first).

I'm 43 and have a 3 year old, an 18 year old and a 22 year old. I'm permanently tired. The 3 year old has sleep and behaviour issues, development delays/additional needs and they just have knackered me out. The teens are an easy pair and don't cause any problems or issues.

At 40 I had a 10 (nearly 11) year old and a 6 year old. That was 15 years ago (still no grandchildren)

At 40 I was mum to an 8 month old. Not by choice, we'd been TTC for 7 years and that's just how long it took!

I am now a 52 year old peri-menopausal mother to a teenager. It's hormone central in our house😬

At 40 I had a 10 (nearly 11) year old and a 6 year old. That was 15 years ago (still no grandchildren)

They were 5&3 so I was older than average but not by much. I was definitely done though- DH and I had already agreed that we didn’t want a big gap so if I wasn’t pregnant by first dc’s second birthday we’d have stopped trying and been happy with one dc. I’ve got mum friends of all ages with ex the same as mine- one is 35 now, another is 40 and then my BF is 49 and her dc are 7&4.

Kind of hoping dd leaves it as late as me so I get out of granny childcare on the grounds of extreme old age 🤣 and get a big gap between kids and grandkids.

One adult, one pre-teen. It's nice to know I'm more than halfway through my parenting journey when most of my adult life has been consumed by "being mum".

I had my first child at 25 , and my second at 41
I’m now 50 with a 25 year old and a 9 year old. In my head im still late twenties early thirties ! I certainly sometimes do feel my age physically but mentally I’m in the young club !