Do you think you're a good parent?

[Wellthisisacanofworms]

And what is it that makes you a good parent?

Just been mulling it over after a particularly tricky weekend with my parents. Their parenting priorities were/are different to mine, and I don't want my kids to obsess over what people think of them and think that only their achievements are what make them worthwhile. It's taken me a long time to realise this. But they are lovely people and they brought me up as well as they knew how.

I think I'm a good enough mum. My two kids are very different and I sometimes wonder if what works for the eldest is necessarily best for the youngest. They are loved, happy and confident little things but they're still young and I often wonder if I'm doing something now that will mess them up in the future!

For me, the important things are:

• I listen to them and try to understand their points of view, as often as I can
• I apologise when I get it wrong
• I show them I love them in as many ways as I can think of
• I try to enforce natural consequences when they get things wrong

But I am sometimes impatient and shouty, my house is usually a mess, and while I think they're lovely, they are by no means model children.

I wish there was a prescribed parenting method which guarantees your kids turn out as happy, grounded and decent adults!

You might think you are doing a good job until your children become teens and then they will let you know all your parenting flaws and let you know how cool and understanding other parents are. My eldest is now out the other side and she tells me what a great parent I am again. When she hit teens I honestly thought I had been the worst parent ever and wondered where I had gone wrong. I hadn't gone wrong, she is now lovely and was just being a hormonal teen.

I'm not sure I can answer that ... I hope I am 'good enough' but it up to my DS to decide if I am a good parent .. he is early 20s now, seems happy enough with my DH's and my parenting .. invited his mates to stay for the weekend so hopefully we don't embarrass him. For various reasons we've all had an early night tonight & he's WhatsApped me a nice 'good night' message.

I really think I am and it turns out I particularly flourished at the dreaded teen parenting!

My grown up dc are polite, well loved/liked, hard working and most importantly kind human beings.
We still have fun together and they enjoy being around me.
They both say I'm the best Mum and that means everything to me!

Yes.
I am strict and have high standards, but very easy going on a day-to-day basis. I'm highly naturally organised but only do the bare minimum in many areas. I take my maternal role extremely seriously and do the best I can. Both ds's have inner confidence, are self assured and naturally happy. I'm proud of the job I did. I made many mistakes. But I always worked at it, invested my time and my thoughts. I'm an analyser and like them to discuss their emotions, but as the only female in a 3 male household, they generally just don't!

No idea, I do have a great teenager but not sure if it a 'chicken or egg' thing on how they became that way

I was a great parent of small pre teen children but that’s relatively easy. Being a mother of teens is a whole different ball game. I’m middling now at best

I don't worry about it, I try my best and hope that they can see when they are older that whilst I have my faults I have always centered them, their health, their education and their friendships and activities. My oldest is hard to read, but I know he sees what I do and appreciates it, even when he won't admit it and my dd is probably a bit too much like me. They think I am loving, brave and determined and if I pass those qualities on, then I will probably be quite happy.

I’ve no idea where I fall tbh. I think generally I’m at the ‘good enough’ level, maybe just ‘alright’ but I don’t know if that’s just low self confidence because I’m terrified I’ll mess them up or if I’m actually substandard. They’re only 5 so I have a bit of time to improve.

I do always tell them how much I love them, praise good behaviour and talk it out, and apologise when I get things wrong. They know I adore them, (they’ve told me in a duh tone that they know I love them) and I hope they know that I’m doing my best by them.

To summarise, I think I’m alright as a parent. I’m not going to win any parenting awards anytime soon, but I’m also not going to be on social services radar so I’m just winging it in the middle lane!