If people are as horrible in real life as they are on here I really feel sorry for their children, friends and family 😩

[ToddlerMama27]

There’s just so much bullying, nastiness and judgement

It’s not too bad, some posters get a bit much but just avoid

Some threads are crazy though, with similar rounding up on a couple. They seem to not mind so fair play to them

I think you are bang on!

I'm too surprised by the harshness in parenting
Any behavioural issue and it's straight to - empty their room /don't let them out/ or if they've reached 18 chuck them out.

And little understanding of childhood trauma or trying to understand where thr child is coming from.

Similarly with special needs- ie the recent autism one where the parent was basically told to expect NT behaviour or punish them for it. It happens so often.

I don;t take much parenting advice from here actually. I am from a different culture which parents differently, so no point. I am mostly on the other threads.

Stop making shit up.

YANBU OP. The comments on here can be so cutting.

It's also worth noting that others on here are extremely supportive.

I used to like MN for the straight-talking posters and still do. However now there seems to be a small but vocal minority who think that straight-talking = giving someone a completely undeserved kicking and piling on to upset the OP as much as they can. These types can end up completely detailing a thread with what is just pure nastiness to make the OP feel bad, with no actual advice. I'd imagine many aren't happy IRL and certainly not as brave face-to-face as they are behind a keyboard.

There are a lot of wind up posts I suspect. But it does help sometimes to get a variety of opinions and perspectives. I doubt a lot of posters would have the nerve to air their true feelings in real life and even say the opposite. There's always the old saying about asking a silly question too

*derailing

It's the threads where some posters seem to forget the saying "if you haven't got anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all"

There seems to be a vocal minority who delight in kicking people when they're down.

You don't exactly come across as a charmer yourself.

I don’t for a second believe that the nastiness on here is how these people behave IRL.

There’s a lot of anger/ bitterness/ resentment/ envy and these are emotions that one cannot openly display in real life - it’s completely socially unacceptable.

Can you imagine a friend or colleague asking for tips on where to stay on their upcoming holiday and someone saying “there’s a COL crisis, your question is so tone deaf” or “what a ridiculous stealth boast”? Wouldn’t happen.

I always wonder what people actually want from threads like this

A lot if people on here are cowards. They won't have the nerve to be unpleasant to someone's face so they come on here to bitch about them anonymously from behind the safety of a keyboard instead.

Says the individual making a sweeping judgement against those reading.

I agree that some posters are nasty as a form of sport but I'd say that's a minority.

What I gave noticed is that some people post for validation and then get upset when they don't get it and call reasonable posts nasty and judgemental.

Interesting ... I'll ponder on that.
I see a lot of threads that "turn", usually when op responds to/defend self against a slightly diggy reply, it often results in a judgey pile on.
I've left perfectly innocent threads only to come back an hour later and it's vitriol and blue murder death fight.

Heh. I was recently in a real life WhatsApp group and I mentioned something about planning a holiday, and was immediately beseiged with comments like " Well, it's all right for you, but some of us can't afford one".

I left the group. People are angrier these days both IRL and on social media.

I think it’s very close to real life: people are not entirely perfect or nasty, they’ve got different sides and they are different. Some posts are a bit crazy but in real life there are a lot of crazy people as well.
However there are a lot of helpful and supportive posters out there and they are in majority.

You have to bear in mind that anybody can post anything on here, which is why it is so entertaining, but you have to take it all with a large pinch of salt.

I find it really scary that people might post on here with piss-take non genuine replies.
I remember a poster saying they name change and post wildly different opinions to wind the op up.
Awful.

I really hope this was posted as a joke.

Yes, that's just trolling isn't it? Troll hunting is the only thing which is heavily moderated on here IME, so I tend to take almost every thread with a pinch of salt unfortunately. As if I report a thread for being a troll it's usually "we're giving them the benefit of the doubt" but troll hunting posts go immediately as they're easier to prove I suppose. I understand it but it does make me very wary of everything said on here!

I’m too much of a coward to say in real
life half the things I say on MN.

My family, kids, husband and friends still hate me though 😂

It’s the lack of proportion that gets me. I’ve seen people describe things that could at most be described as ‘very selfish’ as ‘abhorrent’. Posters competing to be the most outraged.

I had another realisation the other day. I’d been debating something on a thread and discovered I’d claimed something that was factually untrue. IRL I’d expect that to be pointed out civilly, I’d acknowledge and we’d move on. But on here making a mistake gives people a licence to go for the jugular and I realised I just could not be bothered. I can do without being patronised and the sniffy comments about my comprehension skills - and that happens on threads where I haven’t erred!