Noisy hot tub sex session

[Claire1200]

Our neighbours two doors down were in their hot tub at 6.30 this evening when they started having incredibly loud sex for about 15 minutes (primarily her moaning 'oh god' leading up to her pretty much screaming). We were in the garden with our 4 year old and had to take him inside as he was asking a lot of questions about the sounds. I'm quite disgusted that someone would think that acceptable at a family friendly time of day. A friend suggested an anonymous note telling them I don't wish to be involved in their sex life, but they have a ring doorbell so it wouldn't be very anonymous. How do I get the message across for them to get a room without causing red faces all round?

Get one of those horns that spund at football matches

I love you @Hairbrushhandle

I don't get how you have sex in hot tub unless you have a massive vagina. Water dries everything out it simply doesn't work.

ha! id have been yelling encouragement..1,2,3,4 thrust,2,3,4......OH god= "we are praying this side of the fence for you"..or put a cape on and staged a rescue mission?!...threw arm bands??????
woulda told 4 year old...must have shampoo in eyes.. we dont say oh god,we say ,,ive got shampoo in my eyes....turned music up loud as....preferably some sorta inappropriate chunes to anything but heighten the mood any...clapped n cheered when over??? chant some sorta fertility prayer ? (hahaha. 9mths -."oor chlorine")
shouted how was it for you?
ring their bloody doorbell....

Boom!

This thread is Mumsnet catnip -

Neighbours making noise ✔️
Sex pond ✔️
Ring Doorbell ✔️

got it all!

Time to play Bump and Grind on a loud speaker

@ItsCalledAConversation yeah, right, of course you forgot to close the door. Except you know all hotel doors, everywhere around the world, are self closing right?

unbelievably grim.

@Feefoog i thought it was just me 🤣 on mn everyone thinks people have sex in their hot tubs but we tried once and it just doesn’t work. All my natural lube disappeared.

chlamydia soup

I would call across in a bossy voice,
'I do hope you're going to change the water now and give it a good scrub out!'

😅😅😅👍

Ew. Me and DH sometimes have sex in the garden (it's not overlooked by anyone) but part of it is keeping quiet, no one wants to hear anyone else having sex, and if they do then you probably don't want them hearing!

Id of just shouted are you two for real we are in the garden with our 6 year old get a room!

This! I’m a big mouth so wouldn’t worry about telling them

I really don't think people do its a mumsnet myth. I tried it once in a private outdoor whirlpool bath on holiday not a sex pond and it does not work!!!!

Why would there be any “nasties” in it? A proper hot tub has a filter like a pool and you add chlorine. I guarantee you our pool and hot tub are cleaner than your local pool. The filters run constantly. We shower before we get in.

Do you bleach your shower after each use? If not, a hot tub is cleaner than your shower.

ok-its getting late-but i lol'd at lots of these. extension cable/toaster too final?

:-)

Why the assumption that they should be stopped? Jealous?

Ask them if they are happy to talk to the police- you and some neighbours are making a report about your kids being exposed to sexual activity and did they hear it too?

That’s a great idea too!

Playing "She'll bé coming round the mountain when she comes" at full volume ?

This thread is hilarious