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Original poster

Noisy hot tub sex session

110 replies

Claire1200 · 15/05/2023 19:44

Our neighbours two doors down were in their hot tub at 6.30 this evening when they started having incredibly loud sex for about 15 minutes (primarily her moaning 'oh god' leading up to her pretty much screaming). We were in the garden with our 4 year old and had to take him inside as he was asking a lot of questions about the sounds. I'm quite disgusted that someone would think that acceptable at a family friendly time of day. A friend suggested an anonymous note telling them I don't wish to be involved in their sex life, but they have a ring doorbell so it wouldn't be very anonymous. How do I get the message across for them to get a room without causing red faces all round?

OP posts:
Blackoutbeans · 15/05/2023 19:46

Very much doubt this is real but in the unlikely event that it is, perhaps shout 'You are aware that we can hear you, right?!'

Eddielizzard · 15/05/2023 19:47

Start moaning in the offbeats

bossybloss · 15/05/2023 19:48

Put a letter in the post… but don’t forget to disguise your handwriting 🤣

TheSpottedZebra · 15/05/2023 19:48

Send a letter through the post?
Change your WiFi name to loudshaggers@no23

MyDecadent70sArmpits · 15/05/2023 19:51

Sex ponds gonna sex pond.

Original poster
Claire1200 · 15/05/2023 19:54

Sadly it's real. What's even worse is on Saturday they had the neighbours on the other side over for a hot tub party and the other neighbours kid was in the hot tub 🤮 I can't even begin to imagine what nasties could be lurking in that water.

OP posts:
feelingimgoingunder · 15/05/2023 19:57

Get a good aim and throw a note over the wall

saltrocking · 15/05/2023 19:58

We had a garden shagger on our block. We gave them a round of applause one evening. Never heard them at it again

Throwncrumbs · 15/05/2023 19:58

I would be outside shouting over the fences, but I’m not scared of upsetting the dirty feckers!

Hairbrushhandle · 15/05/2023 20:00

This is easy. Get your 4yo a trampoline and a water gun.

corlan · 15/05/2023 20:00

Get your party speaker out and play 'Je t'aime ' next time they're at it.

Maraudingmarauders · 15/05/2023 20:01

Shout your 4yr old questions over the fence for them to answer.

ItsCalledAConversation · 15/05/2023 20:03

Yes just make loud “we can hear you” noises. I’ve been overheard/seen (on holiday - DH and I forgot to close the room door) and a loud wolf whistle from the corridor drew it to our attention - eventually! It’s all in good fun, your DS won’t be scarred for life. Applause and playing something sexy (You and me baby ain’t nothing but man

wildfirewonder · 15/05/2023 20:04

Just shout something, or laugh, or clap.

I had some neighbours who used to be naked or very nearly naked for a considerable percentage of the time. Nightmare when a parcel went there.

ItsCalledAConversation · 15/05/2023 20:04

Sorry posted to soon - meant sexy but silly, and I meant The Bad Touch by Bloodhound Gang blasting out of your speakers should do the trick!!

TFMinx · 15/05/2023 20:16

Wait until the end and shout, "She's faking it!"

Freepo · 15/05/2023 20:18

I wouldn’t worry as I imagine she will shortly be out of action with a nasty bout of thrush after that session. Sex in a hot tub is grim!

trampoline123 · 15/05/2023 20:21

saltrocking · 15/05/2023 19:58

We had a garden shagger on our block. We gave them a round of applause one evening. Never heard them at it again

Brilliant 😂😂

Babytwodue · 15/05/2023 20:30

TFMinx · 15/05/2023 20:16

Wait until the end and shout, "She's faking it!"

😅😅

Original poster
Claire1200 · 15/05/2023 20:30

@TFMinx that's my favourite suggestion so far!

OP posts:
Helloumi · 15/05/2023 20:31

I'd put a fiver on them doing OF

Original poster
Claire1200 · 15/05/2023 20:31

Update on the situation, I've contacted the neighbour on the other side of them and they also heard it. They are friends with the sex pests and she has said she will tell them that sounds travels fast.

OP posts:
Treasureboxkey · 15/05/2023 20:33

I was going to suggest a drone. One of those fuckers hovering overhead would put you right off your breaststroke.

GoodChat · 15/05/2023 20:34

Claire1200 · 15/05/2023 20:31

Update on the situation, I've contacted the neighbour on the other side of them and they also heard it. They are friends with the sex pests and she has said she will tell them that sounds travels fast.

At least it doesn't have to come from you! Your poor DC.

ShivWambsgans · 15/05/2023 20:42

ItsCalledAConversation · 15/05/2023 20:03

Yes just make loud “we can hear you” noises. I’ve been overheard/seen (on holiday - DH and I forgot to close the room door) and a loud wolf whistle from the corridor drew it to our attention - eventually! It’s all in good fun, your DS won’t be scarred for life. Applause and playing something sexy (You and me baby ain’t nothing but man

Eew. You almost sound proud about this. I find it hard to believe two adults would forget to close their door on holiday, especially two adults who also happen to think it is “good fun” to have strangers and their children overhear them having sex. That is an unusual viewpoint to say the least.

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