Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Ex has a surprise for me tomorrow, what could it be?

343 replies

BigWheels · 12/05/2023 17:45

Ex had just left after spending a few hours with our son. On his way out he told us he has a surprise for us tomorrow morning and he will be coming to pick us up at 6.15am. He wasnt giving much away and I hate surprises so I'm desperate to know. Does anyone have any ideas?

Only information I have is that we have to leave at 6.15, its a long car journey and we can have breakfast once we get there.

I've known the guy for 10 years and he has never organised anything like this before. He's a hopeless gift giver so I'm more than a bit apprehensive. Not my birthday for another 2 months and our sons birthday was in February so nothing to celebrate.

I have previously expressed interest in a hot air balloon trip and because of the early start and long car journey I'm thinking maybe its that? But son is still too young for the trip and weather isn't looking great so I have my doubts about the hot air balloon theory. What could it be?

OP posts:
VivienneDelacroix · 13/05/2023 01:11

And his wife is totally fine for him to toddle off and play happy families with you, whilst she stays at home with the baby? Surely he should be planning a family day with his wife and both his children?

SoonToBeinSpotlight · 13/05/2023 07:00

Are you in the car OP??? Any cii op story or still a mystery?

I hope you guys end up having a great day, whatever it is!!!

ThatFraggle · 13/05/2023 07:06

VivienneDelacroix · 13/05/2023 01:11

And his wife is totally fine for him to toddle off and play happy families with you, whilst she stays at home with the baby? Surely he should be planning a family day with his wife and both his children?

Exactly this.

As for DC to be ready at 6 to be picked up to go to Alton towers. Keep it a surprise.

It's a bit controlling not to tell you what it is.

And when he has a wife and is not trying to get back together, a romcom style surprise for you is a bit inconsiderate and disrespectful to her. Surprise the kid, sure, but you don't need to be part of it.

Bonding with the child should be as part of his new family unit.

Justhereforaibu1 · 13/05/2023 07:07

Keep us updated

Justalittlebitduckling · 13/05/2023 08:36

Why is he taking you with him rather than taking his DC and giving you a day off?

GoodChat · 13/05/2023 08:55

Justalittlebitduckling · 13/05/2023 08:36

Why is he taking you with him rather than taking his DC and giving you a day off?

Probably for the same reason as he has contact at her house

ThreeRingCircus · 13/05/2023 09:00

ThatFraggle · 13/05/2023 07:06

Exactly this.

As for DC to be ready at 6 to be picked up to go to Alton towers. Keep it a surprise.

It's a bit controlling not to tell you what it is.

And when he has a wife and is not trying to get back together, a romcom style surprise for you is a bit inconsiderate and disrespectful to her. Surprise the kid, sure, but you don't need to be part of it.

Bonding with the child should be as part of his new family unit.

Yeah I agree with this TBH.

I reckon he's bought a puppy.

MrsPerfect12 · 13/05/2023 09:01

Hope you have a fun day.

FlightOfTheProcrastinator · 13/05/2023 09:05

Here for the update. 😊

PoorlyDS · 13/05/2023 09:12

Here for the update too!!

BroomHandledMouser · 13/05/2023 09:22

@BigWheels I hope you all have an amazing day whatever the surprise is!

I too cannot believe the comments on here.

Only on MN can you absolutely not get on with your ex husbands new family, you MUST hate him and his new wife and be bitter until the end 🙄

Justalittlebitduckling · 13/05/2023 09:31

BroomHandledMouser · 13/05/2023 09:22

@BigWheels I hope you all have an amazing day whatever the surprise is!

I too cannot believe the comments on here.

Only on MN can you absolutely not get on with your ex husbands new family, you MUST hate him and his new wife and be bitter until the end 🙄

You’re massively oversimplifying. There’s a huge difference between hating someone/being bitter and letting them plan a surprise day trip for you on the weekend, which some people have suggested doesn’t imply healthy boundaries.

BillyNoM8s · 13/05/2023 09:45

BroomHandledMouser · 13/05/2023 09:22

@BigWheels I hope you all have an amazing day whatever the surprise is!

I too cannot believe the comments on here.

Only on MN can you absolutely not get on with your ex husbands new family, you MUST hate him and his new wife and be bitter until the end 🙄

It's not that, but if I were his new wife at home with the baby, I'd be raising an eyebrow at my husband taking his ex out for an unexpected surprise day out. Take your kid out of course, but the ex?

Likewise, if my ex wanted me to be up and ready at the crack of dawn, I'd need details.

As someone else said, why is he seeing the child in exes home rather than his own?

Maybe there's a perfectly reasonable explanation but OP hasn't mentioned it. OP says she's met wife and baby. Not that they get on really well and all spend loads of time together doing days out etc.

It is not usual ex partner behaviour, particularly when they've remarried. I don't know why some people are so insistent that it is.

BroomHandledMouser · 13/05/2023 09:49

But it’s no one else’s business?

The OP came on to ask for suggestions on what the surprise might be…..not to have the joy sucked out by people implying that he’s overstepped boundaries/that he should be spending time with his wife and child.

As crazy as it might sound to some, you can have a blended family that actually talk and communicate with each other and who can get on together.

If the OP/wife felt like their boundaries were being compromised, they would’ve said no? Not everything needs to be a massive drama.

bobbysock · 13/05/2023 09:55

Here for the update.

BungalowBuyer · 13/05/2023 09:55

Also here for the update.

HolyFuckerRooney · 13/05/2023 09:58

Unashamedly PM

NameChange900 · 13/05/2023 09:59

Blimey, this thread is a more than a bit weird. OP and her ex have an amicable relationship. He's probably seen someone else do similar (work or social media possibly?) and thought it would be nice to do a surprise day trip. Might be a bit short sighted, but it's not as weird as people seem to be making out here. Hope you have fun whatever you're doing OP!

Batalax · 13/05/2023 10:02

I’m waiting to see what it was too. You must be there by now op.

Doyoumind · 13/05/2023 10:03

If OP hasn't updated when she's had 4 hours to, maybe there won't be an update. My money was on Alton Towers.

NotAnotherBathBomb · 13/05/2023 10:03

Here for the reveal

tailinthejam · 13/05/2023 10:09

Also here for the reveal, and hoping it isn't some of the suggestions so far... I wouldn't want to get up that early and be surprised by flabby rhubarb.

BigWheels · 13/05/2023 10:09

It was a trip in a hot air balloon for me as a very belated mothers days present. Son and ex went and had breakfast and a play in the park while I was up in the air.

Next time I will trust my instincts and not coming to mumsnet looking for ideas. Theres no need to try and make something negative out of a nice surprise.

OP posts:
AlwaysFoldingWashing · 13/05/2023 10:12

@BigWheels that sounds lovely!! Hope you enjoyed it. Sounds like you are co-parenting amazingly well too! What great role models for your wee one, so nice to hear positives for a change

justanothernamechangemonday · 13/05/2023 10:13

How lovely. I hope you had a lovely time, there have been some batshit posts on here from some clearly very bitter people.