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Ex has a surprise for me tomorrow, what could it be?

343 replies

BigWheels · 12/05/2023 17:45

Ex had just left after spending a few hours with our son. On his way out he told us he has a surprise for us tomorrow morning and he will be coming to pick us up at 6.15am. He wasnt giving much away and I hate surprises so I'm desperate to know. Does anyone have any ideas?

Only information I have is that we have to leave at 6.15, its a long car journey and we can have breakfast once we get there.

I've known the guy for 10 years and he has never organised anything like this before. He's a hopeless gift giver so I'm more than a bit apprehensive. Not my birthday for another 2 months and our sons birthday was in February so nothing to celebrate.

I have previously expressed interest in a hot air balloon trip and because of the early start and long car journey I'm thinking maybe its that? But son is still too young for the trip and weather isn't looking great so I have my doubts about the hot air balloon theory. What could it be?

OP posts:
Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 13/05/2023 23:01

Liorae · 13/05/2023 22:59

Not if she's not into it. Being married doesn't mean you are only allowed to do things with your spouse.

I think he wanted a day away from his wife and baby. Op will soon be getting more treats and surprises over the next few months

fryanddry · 13/05/2023 23:06

Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 13/05/2023 23:01

I think he wanted a day away from his wife and baby. Op will soon be getting more treats and surprises over the next few months

😂yes
OP please update us when your ex starts trying it on with you

adriftinadenofvipers · 14/05/2023 00:58

Oh FFS, why does everyone have to have an ulterior motive??!!

Liorae · 14/05/2023 01:03

adriftinadenofvipers · 14/05/2023 00:58

Oh FFS, why does everyone have to have an ulterior motive??!!

It's Mumsnet. They hate women in general while pretending to be feminist.

BadNomad · 14/05/2023 01:07

Eh? Who mentioned women? We're talking about a man who has suddenly changed his behaviour towards his ex.

Mouldyfoodhelp · 14/05/2023 01:29

MN: men are shit they never do anything and are rude and useless especially after a split

Also MN; this man has dome something nice he's shit for doing that and obviously wants an affair/ split up with his wife.

BadNomad · 14/05/2023 01:44

Yes, men who only start doing nice things for a woman after they've gotten married and had a baby with another woman are shit. If he was a kind person, he wouldn't have waited until now to show it.

Mouldyfoodhelp · 14/05/2023 02:23

But we don't know why they split or that he only started doing that now OP just said he hasn't done anything like this before and he's normally crap at gift giving. I'm not sure you can then deeply analysis his personality or intentions from that.

BadNomad · 14/05/2023 02:57

Mouldyfoodhelp · 14/05/2023 02:23

But we don't know why they split or that he only started doing that now OP just said he hasn't done anything like this before and he's normally crap at gift giving. I'm not sure you can then deeply analysis his personality or intentions from that.

Yes. She's known him for 10 years and he has never organised something like this for her before. Not in 10 years. Not at any point during their relationship. He had never bothered once to get her something she actually wanted. All his gifts have been crap. Until now, when they're no longer together, he has arranged for her to do something she actually wanted. This is something he has done specifically for the OP. Not their child. How is that not odd to you? Why would he bother now when he has never bothered before?

NotAnotherBathBomb · 14/05/2023 06:09

SchoolTripDrama · 13/05/2023 13:09

Hot air balloon? Nope! I'd be fuming. Knowing what I do about Hot Air Balloons there's no way I get in one. I'd be going HOME!

Pointless comment, OP says it's something she's always wanted to do. If OP felt like you it wouldn't have happened Confused

NotAnotherBathBomb · 14/05/2023 06:20

adriftinadenofvipers · 14/05/2023 00:58

Oh FFS, why does everyone have to have an ulterior motive??!!

Because they have poor taste in men/bad judgement and have exes that aren't capable of having a half decent relationship for the sake of their children.

NotAnotherBathBomb · 14/05/2023 06:24

BadNomad · 14/05/2023 01:44

Yes, men who only start doing nice things for a woman after they've gotten married and had a baby with another woman are shit. If he was a kind person, he wouldn't have waited until now to show it.

Well the thinking on MN is that many men 'change' after a child is born. That's usually the excuse for blissfully ignoring not spotting the waving red flags that some seem to have.

Maybe this man changed for the better 😂

Maybe he's more mature. Maybe having a baby with a different woman has opened his eyes to his mistakes with his ex and he's trying to be a better person.

If you really believe a man can change after you've married him and have kids, then he can change.

doozledog · 14/05/2023 06:31

Is it sad that I'm intrigued lol

DunkingMyDonuts · 14/05/2023 07:10

About what @doozledog ?

Grapefruittea · 14/05/2023 07:15

What was the surprise?

xsquared · 14/05/2023 07:22

What a lovely update.

I'm not surprised op hasn't come back though. Even after the update, some posters are banging on with their own projections and narratives of about the op's relationship with her ex.

xsquared · 14/05/2023 07:24

The surprise was a hot air balloon trip, which op has always wanted to do.

You can see all the op's posts by clicking on the blue "See all" underneath the thread title in the right.

Grapefruittea · 14/05/2023 07:44

Well it's lovely
To read a positive story of an ex that is treating the mother of his child so well.
Hope you had a fabulous time OP xxx

Pegsandsunshine · 14/05/2023 10:11

I am still laughing at

OP's ex: I have a ncie surprise, to go could you be ready at 6am so we can make it
Half of this thread: Coercive control and abuse!

Mirabai · 14/05/2023 11:14

NotAnotherBathBomb · 14/05/2023 06:24

Well the thinking on MN is that many men 'change' after a child is born. That's usually the excuse for blissfully ignoring not spotting the waving red flags that some seem to have.

Maybe this man changed for the better 😂

Maybe he's more mature. Maybe having a baby with a different woman has opened his eyes to his mistakes with his ex and he's trying to be a better person.

If you really believe a man can change after you've married him and have kids, then he can change.

If he’s more mature and addressing his mistakes why is he not getting up at 5.30 to help his own wife and baby? She might have liked a lie in.

OP is ex - that horse has bolted.

Mouldyfoodhelp · 14/05/2023 11:31

BadNomad · 14/05/2023 02:57

Yes. She's known him for 10 years and he has never organised something like this for her before. Not in 10 years. Not at any point during their relationship. He had never bothered once to get her something she actually wanted. All his gifts have been crap. Until now, when they're no longer together, he has arranged for her to do something she actually wanted. This is something he has done specifically for the OP. Not their child. How is that not odd to you? Why would he bother now when he has never bothered before?

Well it's pretty simple she didn't say he's never tried to get him something she wanted and she never said he hasnt got anything she likes before ( i think) just that he's not a great gift giver so for all we know he has got her some things she likes before, or at least tried and they've fallen flat.

Maybe this time he struck lightning or as PP have said hot air balloons are expensive so he was saving it for a later time and maybe this was the time as we can equally make up potential what ifs and say thud could be a landmark year for OP in terms of a birthday or something so it goes with that.

He's obviously not the biggest arsehole on the planet ( to OP) as they've seemingly kept friendly after the split so I don't know why posters are assuming the worst of him

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 14/05/2023 12:16

so would you be ok with your husband taking his ex out on a date

It wasn't a date though, it was him and son dropping her off for the balloon ride. If he had been going up in the balloon too it might be viewed differently. Yes he might be making up for not having done this when they were actually in a relationship but good for him if he is. I'd rather this than parents who don't speak at all to each other unless it's to try to score points etc.

ThatFraggle · 14/05/2023 12:42

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 14/05/2023 12:16

so would you be ok with your husband taking his ex out on a date

It wasn't a date though, it was him and son dropping her off for the balloon ride. If he had been going up in the balloon too it might be viewed differently. Yes he might be making up for not having done this when they were actually in a relationship but good for him if he is. I'd rather this than parents who don't speak at all to each other unless it's to try to score points etc.

But why did he have to be part of it?

Imagine if I gave you a voucher for a lovely cream tea that you can book for any day you like. Vs me saying, "on Saturday get ready, I'm taking you somewhere as a surprise!"

Can you see the difference?

ArcticSkewer · 14/05/2023 12:56

ThatFraggle · 14/05/2023 12:42

But why did he have to be part of it?

Imagine if I gave you a voucher for a lovely cream tea that you can book for any day you like. Vs me saying, "on Saturday get ready, I'm taking you somewhere as a surprise!"

Can you see the difference?

And then you get to eat your lovely cream tea all by yourself instead of, perhaps, with a friend or ... omg ... a new boyfriend....

At a day and time of your ex's choosing.

Mirabai · 14/05/2023 13:30

You get to eat your cream tea with a person of your choice. Vouchers don’t usually have set dates.