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Original poster

Your worst faux pas

361 replies

AtChoService · 02/05/2023 08:32

Reading a coronation menu just reminded me of this, it was 20 years ago and I still cringe 😬

I was in my first proper job, first posh Christmas party and the food had servers but you had to go up to the table, get a plate and go along the line.

The starter had a few options, ham, melon, compote stuff, a few other things.

I moved along the line and stopped and held mh plate out at each server, thinking this doesn't ago, this is a bit odd, got an odd look but thought nothing of it at the time, 🙈 you weren't supposed to take a portion of everything, you were supposed to choose melon OR the other thing, not all of it 🥴

I doubt anyone but the servers noticed but I still cringe a bit now.

OP posts:
Original poster
AtChoService · 02/05/2023 10:34

Yes, I should have known I'd need to put lighthearted for the miseries on here 🙄

I once got in someone elses car. This was around the saem time as the greedy starter on the op. My BF was with his uncle in his (uncles) car and I didn't know what car it was. I cam eout my house and a car parked a little bit up the road flashed its tail liaghts so I ran over and got in the back seat, and some woman started screaming 😂

OP posts:
DilemmaDelilah · 02/05/2023 10:43

I have never been able to forget the time I went to stay the weekend with a friend from (boarding) school. We were picked up from the station by her parents and on the car journey to her house the conversation turned to houses. I remember saying, quite clearly, 'Oh I hate all these modern boxes'. Guess what... They lived in a modern box! In my defence... I was about 13, we had just moved into an old cottage from a modern box, I was/am very socially awkward (undiagnosed autism) and was just parroting what I had heard my mother say and, in hindsight, they probably lived in married quarters and didn't choose their house. Every time I think of it I blush.

BellaTheDarkOverlord · 02/05/2023 10:47

Taking takeaway from delivery driver. He says enjoy your food. I said you too 😂It can't be helped!

My friend when 17 year old, her grandad died. I was comforting her. Making awkward small talk, I aaked have you known him long? She was like wtf he's my grandad I've known him my whole life. Made her laugh though I suppose and cheered her up a bit.

Soubriquet · 02/05/2023 10:57

I was drunk so I blame this, but this girl kept saying what, what? What?

Finally, I snapped with “I’m deaf! What’s your excuse?!”

Yeah…she was deaf too

Original poster
AtChoService · 02/05/2023 10:59

growgrowinggrown · 02/05/2023 08:47

When I was a teenager I dated someone from my part time job who was a little older.

I was invited to one of his work friends get togethers, a nice meal in what I considered to be a 'posh' restaurant at the time.

When my boyfriend went to the loo the person at the head of the table worked out the bill and shouted out the contribution needed.

It was pretty high for my 16 year old tastes but I thought I'd be cute and pay for us both as he always footed the bill so handed my money over happily.

Bf returns from loo, I told him id paid, my treat, and we all started to get up, put coats etc. That's when she shouted down to my bf to pay his portion of the bill.

I was mortified, I assumed the high price had been per couple. I pretended to be too absorbed in what I was doing and ignored the whole thing while he fished around in his pocket for a few notes.

Me and my friend once went to a bar, with some older boys and when I was my turn to get a round, my friend came with me and said, look, I think thats the price, and there was a little digital display up behind the bar, saying 23 or 24 something, I went, no, thats the time! shocked 6th form me then had to stump up a fortune!

OP posts:
Original poster
AtChoService · 02/05/2023 11:02

BellaTheDarkOverlord · 02/05/2023 10:47

Taking takeaway from delivery driver. He says enjoy your food. I said you too 😂It can't be helped!

My friend when 17 year old, her grandad died. I was comforting her. Making awkward small talk, I aaked have you known him long? She was like wtf he's my grandad I've known him my whole life. Made her laugh though I suppose and cheered her up a bit.

I once said Happy Birthday back to someone that said it to me.

And told someone IN A WORK MEETING, that asked for vegetarian options, that we had egg, cheese, ham... In my defence everyone used to order bacon, egg, sausage, and I got mixed up and gave them the cold options ffs.

OP posts:
WomanStanleyWoman2 · 02/05/2023 11:02

A friend of mine used to help out a disabled neighbour. We were going out for the afternoon once and she asked if I’d mind if we took him for a drink first, as he didn’t get out much.

I can’t actually remember the name of the condition, but it was degenerative and made it very difficult for him to walk. He was very chatty and told me how much he loved going to the pub as he was a big drinker, boasting about how many pints he could put away. I said “Wow, you must have hollow legs!”

When I realised what I’d said I began praying I’d drop dead.

TheShellBeach · 02/05/2023 11:07

Telling a woman at my niece's birthday party that I thought my niece's husband was weird, and I didn't like him - only to discover the women was the husband's sister.

Seasonofthewitch83 · 02/05/2023 11:10

The only one springing to mind is being in Australia to meet DHs family at a big party. I had been chatting away to one of his Uncles for ages, then I went and got myself drink and the Uncle returned and asked what I was drinking. I replied 'Oh just a coke - Great to chat to you, I am just going to go see where DH is.' and he said 'Boring you so quickly am I?' and I sorta laughed and walked off before realizing it was a totally different Uncle who I hadnt spoken to before.

TheShellBeach · 02/05/2023 11:11

ATaxiForTwo · 02/05/2023 09:50

I've shared this before but it still haunts me. Apologies for the terrible retelling.

I'd booked a taxi to take me into town straight from work.

I was standing outside waiting for my taxi, and one appeared. I went over and opened the door to find this rather 'posh' looking gentleman sitting in the back. I didn't say a word, just stared at him for a few seconds then shut the door.

.I went around the corner, out of his sight, for a few minutes while I got over the embarrassment. I then went back into the forecourt and thought 'There's my taxi'
I went to it, opened the door again, to find the same gentleman sitting there glaring at me.

Again I didn't say a word, just looked at him in shock, and disbelief, then closed the door again.

I went back inside the building and 5 minutes later my taxi arrived. It pulled up and I thought thank god, and approached it. Opened it's door, to find that for the third time I'd opened the door of the taxi with that gentleman in it again.

This time I shut the door immediately and dived into my taxi hoping and praying that I'd never see him again.(So far so good)

I don't understand this story. Did you get into the taxi with the man in it? Why did two taxis arrive at once?

GoldDuster · 02/05/2023 11:18

We were leaving the car at a farm type parking thing before a middle of the night flight, instructions were to drive through the gate, park up and head into the office, and someone would shuttle us in a mini bus to the airport.

Parked, DP got baggage and DC out of car, I headed over to the "office", pushed opened the door, and saw a bloke in his underpants standing there stirring some sugar into a coffee.

I presumed he was the bloke who was going to drive the shuttle to the airport, he denied all knowledga and I showed him my printed confirmation.

We had some very awkward circular confused conversation, which got weirder and weirder, before I realised that he was not the driver, and he realised I was not the owner of the farm, and I had walked into a rental cottage where he and his wife were staying, and he'd got up to make her a brew.

He appeared at the terminal outside WH Smith with his wife, who gave me a full interrogation after he pointed at me saying "that's her!" regarding what the hell I thought I was doing walking into her cottage at 4am and talking to her husband, in his pants.

DP and DC nearly disowned me and it still makes me laugh/ turn inside out in equal measures.

freezingmytoesoff · 02/05/2023 11:21

I'm glad someone else was confused too, I don't quite understand the end of the story?!

freezingmytoesoff · 02/05/2023 11:21

TheShellBeach · 02/05/2023 11:11

I don't understand this story. Did you get into the taxi with the man in it? Why did two taxis arrive at once?

Show quote history

Sorry in reply to this one!

ATaxiForTwo · 02/05/2023 11:21

I don't understand this story. Did you get into the taxi with the man in it? Why did two taxis arrive at once?

I didn't get into the taxi because I opened the door and saw him sitting in there. (Then forgot and did it again and then opened the door to the wrong taxi) Two taxis didn't arrive at once. Mine arrived and his was still sitting in the forecourt. I assume that he was waiting for someone to join him. He must have been wondering why some random weirdo kept opening his door.

stbrandonsboat · 02/05/2023 11:24

I once asked the sex of someone's baby. It was sitting in a white dress covered in pink rosebuds and quite obviously a girl 🤦

Reallyareyousure · 02/05/2023 11:24

A colleague had been ill off work for a week or two. She had some heart trouble so when I saw her I asked her if she was feeling better. I found out from someone else later that day that she'd had a miscarriage. Of course she wasn't feeling better. I felt awful.

TheShellBeach · 02/05/2023 11:31

ATaxiForTwo · 02/05/2023 11:21

I don't understand this story. Did you get into the taxi with the man in it? Why did two taxis arrive at once?

I didn't get into the taxi because I opened the door and saw him sitting in there. (Then forgot and did it again and then opened the door to the wrong taxi) Two taxis didn't arrive at once. Mine arrived and his was still sitting in the forecourt. I assume that he was waiting for someone to join him. He must have been wondering why some random weirdo kept opening his door.

But if his taxi was sitting on the forecourt for so long why didn't it just drive off?

ATaxiForTwo · 02/05/2023 11:35

But if his taxi was sitting on the forecourt for so long why didn't it just drive off?

I don't know. It didn't occur to me to ask. I assume that he was waiting for someone to join him, because that's the most likely explanation. perhaps one of the managers as they left a bit later than we did. Or he was waiting for someone to give him something that he needed. It wasn't really that long. Probably 10-15 minutes at most but it felt like an eternity.

BloodyHellKen · 02/05/2023 11:39

magicstar1 · 02/05/2023 08:59

Bumping into an old friend and asking how his mother was….because I’d completely forgotten that I’d been to her funeral a couple of years before.

OMG that reminds me of mine.

A friends sister was starting a new job and told me she was nervous but she was going to explain to her colleagues that her dad had recently died so that was why she might be a bit reserved. I guffawed and laughed no you can't do that because I had genuinely forgotten that their dad had recently died, the week before!!!! Sometimes even I cringe at my own idiocy 😬

NormaLouiseBates · 02/05/2023 11:40

OneMistakeAfterAnother · 02/05/2023 10:01

I temporarily worked for a company called Harry Fairbairn, only I kept getting tongue tied when people called and saying "Hello. Hairy Farnbarn. I just couldn't help it. Who knows what sort of establishment they thought they'd called instead of a car dealership?

This is brilliant 🤣🤣

Bubblesoffun · 02/05/2023 11:40

Getting chicken breast from the butcher. Said to the one female butcher in the shop.
“Can I see the size of your breasts?”
🤷🏻‍♀️😂 at least she laughed…

sydsmum · 02/05/2023 11:50

A few years ago, out dog walking, I bumped into a fellow dog walker who was heavily pregnant and her friend. I congratulated them both on their pregnancies. Only one of them was pregnant.

VeronicaBeccabunga · 02/05/2023 11:51

Visited a friend's new house, went on at great length about how unsuitable the hall wallpaper was for such a small dark space with irregular bits of wall divided by doorways and stairs.
It was a large William Morris print in very dark colours, lovely choice for a larger room, I thought. And said.
Friend reappeared with coffee, I asked if they'd like help stripping the awful wallpaper to lighten up the hall.
They had, of course, just decorated it.

HowDoYouDoWhatYouDoToMeIWishIKnew · 02/05/2023 11:51

The worst one I've ever seen was from an old friend of mine.

Our kids went to the same nursery and we had older kids, there were 30 mins between the end of nursery and the end of school so there used to be loads of people in the park, waiting.

My friend beelined over to me and asked if my dc had an invite for Xs party, I said yes and that I had replied saying we were going.

Friend asked who the mum of the kid was and I said I wasn't too sure, so friend went on a rant about the mum clearly inviting everyone just to get presents, before I could say anything a woman came over and said "I'll stop you there, I'm Xs mum, and I just wanted my child to get to know their classmates, not get presents thank you".

It was excruciatingly quiet after that. I couldn't think of a single thing to say to make it better, and friend was absolutely shame faced.

Good on the mum for saying something though.

seratoninmoonbeams · 02/05/2023 11:53

OneMistakeAfterAnother · 02/05/2023 10:01

I temporarily worked for a company called Harry Fairbairn, only I kept getting tongue tied when people called and saying "Hello. Hairy Farnbarn. I just couldn't help it. Who knows what sort of establishment they thought they'd called instead of a car dealership?

@OneMistakeAfterAnother this reminded me of a job I had and I had to say Kent and Sussex window company or similar. Muddled up the Kent and Sussex didn't I 😬