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Original poster

Easter Cheeky Fuckery.

228 replies

Offthexmaslist · 10/04/2023 10:16

NC for this as very outing ..

My brother, sister in law, self and DH hired a big beautiful country house for Easter . We invited our 5 kids and their husbands /wives /partners . Along with my younger brother and his wife.

We also had 3 other siblings from nearby for lunch with their partners and kids.

There were 15 for supper Fri night
16 Saturday night
17 for Roast on Sunday.

Little bro arrived first and nabbed the biggest bedroom. The only one with an ensuite.

At NO POINT did either of them lift a finger . They didn't make a cup of tea. Peel a potato or bring any contribution.
Nor did they offer to contribute to the cost. (Which we wouldn't have expected ). They literally sat on the sofa and watched every single family member play their part . Meals for that amount is a group effort.

At each meal they were the first to sit down and help themselves. Eat before anyone else was sat down and got up and left the dining table before others had finished (or barely started)

We are clearing up the house this morning in ready for 11am exit.. yet again they have arrived to eat breakfast.. late risers , leisurely shower while the other 10 people run around doing food and laying out a beautiful buffet breakfast.
Which they again were first to help themselves to..

This has tipped my big brother (supported by me) over the top. Exploded at them asking why they thought everyone was there to wait on them hand and foot . (This was done away from the others just us siblings.)

Apparently SIL is depressed and suffering from anxiety. (Didn't seem to prevent her sitting in the sunshine laughing and joking whilst knocking back 2 bottles of wine -they didn't buy and smoking all day)
'Little Brother doesn't know how to cook.' (No one asked him to. But he is not so ignorant that he doesn't know how to peel a carrot or offer to make a cup of tea)

Best of all.. 'You invited us on holiday' so we are having a holiday. We need the rest ..

Honestly . I need to know. How on earth can people behave like this ? They appear to have absolutely no guilt or sense of humility .

Just an overwhelming sense of entitlement.

I've just asked them to strip their bed and leave the sheets in the laundry. This has caused my SIL to declare 'that's what these places have cleaners to do' pack their bags and drive off without saying goodbye.

The 10 people remaining are actually so gobsmacked by such world class cheeky fuckery that they have decided to just put it in the bank of funny tales for the future. Whilst db sil self and DH want to know how people like this actually operate through their day to day lives.

OP posts:
Ktime · 10/04/2023 17:16

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 14:46

It is a performance. Big beautiful spread, high days and holidays, lots of children, ooh her anxiety didn't stop her necking the wine. Oh I don't know if he offered to pay but myself and my hero big brother made sure to only gave an acceptable number of kids and certainly offer.

The hero big bro who exploded and made the weekend end horribly.

You look down on him and his wife because you think your adult kids are so well rounded and grown up for chipping in by making a brew or two. You've never holidayed together before. They slept later than you. She smokes. She drinks. She's lazy. He's a baby. Hmmmm. I wonder what kind of superior comments they have been subjected to over the years. Hard being the runt of the litter when everyone else is so perfect.

There are lazy fuckers in my family too, they always get told to join in but to be honest it would be the brother that exploded after just 3 days that would leave a sour taste. And the sister hanging off his every word backing him up. There's no need for it. If you couldn't be arsed to tell him to get his arse in gear and you're not inviting them again then there was no reason for the fucking shouting and balling and upset to what should've been a nice get together.

All as bad as each other.

So you’ve said OP couldn't be arsed to tell him to get his arse in gear and help and also that OP must not have allowed any room to help.

Which is it?

Ktime · 10/04/2023 17:18

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:13

Haha it's ok, it's not me. The OP could probably read the post and know it's not her SIL or advance search me and see.

Not bothered either way, just didn't like the snotty air of the posts and supporting the other brother as he "explodes" at someone. He sounds a prick as well as the lazy brother tbh

It’s so obvious that a sibling has called you out on selfish behaviour before and you’re projecting that butt hurt on to OP.

I don’t believe you cooked for 3 families yesterday anywhere except in your imagination.

tolerable · 10/04/2023 17:18

They are the reason blank cards are a thing.
get one.
Your behaviour and interactions were stand out.As clearly you are your top priority-you mighta missed all who were upset...then group sign it..and let it go.

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:20

"It’s so obvious that a sibling has called you out on selfish behaviour before and you’re projecting that butt hurt on to OP.

I don’t believe you cooked for 3 families yesterday anywhere except in your imagination."

🤣 that has never happened and yes I did. My house is always full of people. Some helpful, some lazy. Talk about reaching. What the fuck is "butt hurt" 🤢

TheaBrandt · 10/04/2023 17:20

We are 3 siblings all with own families. Occasionally all stay in a big house usually 3-4 nights only. Joint big online shop which you all add to and split bill each family does one dinner of their choice for everyone each night with picky cheese / bread / salad / bought quiche type lunch. Whoever doesn’t cook clears up. It’s not hard!

BeeBB · 10/04/2023 17:20

I would have turfed them out of the best bedroom and kept them on washing up and recycling duties.

DSIS and her partner did something similar but not quite as bad. I was recovering from an OP and we booked a large cottage one bank holiday weekend in Northumberland. It was the only one left so a bit bigger than we wanted as it slept 8-10 and only 4 of us.

We invited DSIS and family along and made it clear we were paying for the cottage just asked them to let us know either way whether or not they wanted to come. We had the first night on our own and invited them for the second day and night (it was only 90 min drive away). They wouldn’t commit to letting us know whether or not they were coming until the last minute so we had no option to invite anyone else. I said I would cook for the night and we bought all the food and lots of food for breakfast and some alcohol for the evening. On the morning they were due to come she texted to ask what she could bring and I said well we have bought things for lunch, all the food for tea but maybe just bring a couple of bottles of wine and maybe some nibbles.

I expected them to turn up mid to late morning and said this and told her to message when they were near. They turned up completely empty handed about 6pm without explanation. Her partner got very drunk and drank more than myself, DH and DSIS put together.

The next morning her partner had a long lie in and we delayed washing up until after breakfast waiting for him. He surprised us by only wanting a coffee. We had to strip the beds and put any rubbish out and do a quick tidy before leaving which we had said. He took a massive dump in the downstairs loo made a horrible stink, they made a hasty exit barely saying goodbye or thank you and didn’t help with any washing up or putting any rubbish out or anything else. I wouldn’t do it again.

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:23

"So you’ve said OP couldn't be arsed to tell him to get his arse in gear and help and also that OP must not have allowed any room to help.

Which is it?"

What? I haven't said that at all. Must not have allowed room to help? Nope. He's a lazy fucker but it's clear they can't stand him and the wife anyway. He's off the Xmas list and got "exploded" at. Why let it build up to that? Sounds tense and unpleasant.

My family get along. I couldn't do with all this performance

Ktime · 10/04/2023 17:24

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:20

"It’s so obvious that a sibling has called you out on selfish behaviour before and you’re projecting that butt hurt on to OP.

I don’t believe you cooked for 3 families yesterday anywhere except in your imagination."

🤣 that has never happened and yes I did. My house is always full of people. Some helpful, some lazy. Talk about reaching. What the fuck is "butt hurt" 🤢

Do the lazy people just do what you ask them to do though?

OP can’t force her DB to help but she can refuse to host him again surely?

Ktime · 10/04/2023 17:25

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:23

"So you’ve said OP couldn't be arsed to tell him to get his arse in gear and help and also that OP must not have allowed any room to help.

Which is it?"

What? I haven't said that at all. Must not have allowed room to help? Nope. He's a lazy fucker but it's clear they can't stand him and the wife anyway. He's off the Xmas list and got "exploded" at. Why let it build up to that? Sounds tense and unpleasant.

My family get along. I couldn't do with all this performance

You said Maybe they think "too many cooks" etc as you're all jostling to be the most pro-active in the kitchen?

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:26

"Do the lazy people just do what you ask them to do though?

OP can’t force her DB to help but she can refuse to host him again surely?"

Yeah of course she can. It's the brother exploding and her cheering him on that sounds vile.

The lazy people usually do buck up their ideas when told but even if they didn't I wouldn't be horrible to them and sour everyone's experience.

sunglassesonthetable · 10/04/2023 17:28

They were shite. End of.

Most people know how to behave. Been on loads of these weekends and you chip in, help or ask for jobs etc. It's a basic.

Last thing anyone wants to do is be the weekend police. ^

can you do this please?^
^
can you peel these please ?

ahem, can you help pack away before you go please?
^
It's bloody awkward and exhausting.

All this enabling shite is crap. They're useless guests .I doubt they get invited back to anything.

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:28

Yeah, I meant maybe they think they're in the way. They certainly sound made to feel surplus to requirements.

I can see how my wording didn't get that across.

SkaneTos · 10/04/2023 17:30

Too many people.

Ktime · 10/04/2023 17:31

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:26

"Do the lazy people just do what you ask them to do though?

OP can’t force her DB to help but she can refuse to host him again surely?"

Yeah of course she can. It's the brother exploding and her cheering him on that sounds vile.

The lazy people usually do buck up their ideas when told but even if they didn't I wouldn't be horrible to them and sour everyone's experience.

To be fair, OP did say the exploding happened away from everyone else.

Gymnopedie · 10/04/2023 17:31

I am not, I promise, the petty type. I prefer to sort things out with adult conversations. But bro and SIL clearly didn't take any notice. So in this instance I would take great delight in all the others who were there that weekend doing it again without bro and SIL, then plastering it all over social media.

Yup, THAT petty!

Denise82 · 10/04/2023 17:34

Going forward it's simple, you don't invite them.

PriamFarrl · 10/04/2023 17:34

This reminds me of an episode of Mum.

sunglassesonthetable · 10/04/2023 17:38

There are lazy fuckers in my family too, they always get told to join in but to be honest it would be the brother that exploded after just 3 days that would leave a sour taste. And the sister hanging off his every word backing him up. There's no need for it. If you couldn't be arsed to tell him to get his arse in gear and you're not inviting them again then there was no reason for the fucking shouting and balling and upset to what should've been a nice get together.

just read this.

Blimey there's a whole play for today going on here. Projection or what.

I'd be losing it with a pair of lazy fucks like that.

Rhondaa · 10/04/2023 17:39

'Apparently SIL is depressed and suffering from anxiety. (Didn't seem to prevent her sitting in the sunshine laughing and joking whilst knocking back 2 bottles of wine -they didn't buy and smoking all day)'

What do you mean by this op? It seems that you're suggesting those with 'apparently' mh problems don't laugh, joke smoke and drink? Can you see how comments like this sound incredibly judgemental and perhaps, just perhaps your manner and negative attitude may have contributed to the whole shit weekend that culminated with the exploding older db?

Iwillhavethefullenglishplease · 10/04/2023 17:39

MsCunk · 10/04/2023 16:42

It's stories like this that make me wonder if big family get togethers in one house, with self catering, are in any way worth it.

They're usually bloody hard work. The most relaxing big family holidays are where every minute of everyday is planned and all meals are provided/planned by someone else. That way the whole day isn't spent trying to appease 45 different people of verging ages and fussiness. Self catering holidays where more than one household comes together for a prolonged period of time are exhausting and stressful.

ThatsN0tFunny · 10/04/2023 17:39

Softoprider · 10/04/2023 12:21

You are right OP. They should not have done it but they did. The key here is to never let this happen again and that is by never including them in a holiday like this. Yes invite them to other events but not a holiday where everyone pitches in.

This . They are adults and you are not going to change them. Either don’t invite then or accept what they are like.

As a PP said, it’s not as if they are strangers . You must know what they are like.

RideACockHorseToSunburyCross · 10/04/2023 17:41

"What do you mean by this op? It seems that you're suggesting those with 'apparently' mh problems don't laugh, joke smoke and drink? Can you see how comments like this sound incredibly judgemental and perhaps, just perhaps your manner and negative attitude may have contributed to the whole shit weekend that culminated with the exploding older db?"

Ooh careful. Point that out and you get told you're projecting and also a liar 🤣

TrewleyTired · 10/04/2023 17:42

Rhondaa · 10/04/2023 17:39

'Apparently SIL is depressed and suffering from anxiety. (Didn't seem to prevent her sitting in the sunshine laughing and joking whilst knocking back 2 bottles of wine -they didn't buy and smoking all day)'

What do you mean by this op? It seems that you're suggesting those with 'apparently' mh problems don't laugh, joke smoke and drink? Can you see how comments like this sound incredibly judgemental and perhaps, just perhaps your manner and negative attitude may have contributed to the whole shit weekend that culminated with the exploding older db?

@Janiie really? I’m sure she could have managed to wash up a plate or two, or say thank you and goodbye when she left, don’t you?

CheeseMcKnees · 10/04/2023 17:43

My mum allocates us jobs/costs and it makes everything run smoothly

sunglassesonthetable · 10/04/2023 17:48

My mum allocates us jobs/costs and it makes everything run smoothly

It's actually great when someone steps in and takes the organising lead.