Anyone up for a ‘sort yourself out’ supportive encouraging thread?

[SpringOn]

Hi,
I’m 47, feeing old. I’ve very much lost my way with style, exercise, hair, you name it.
I need to:
lose two stone
decide what to do with my witchy mostly grey hair (I’ve been growing out dark brown dye for 10 months, decided to go grey, but I feel so old! Don’t know whether to go back to dye or stay grey).
mu wardrobe is a disaster. I have some decent smart work stuff but my casual clothes are basically lairy leggings and hoodies. I am a size 20.
My house needs a good clean and de clutter
I want to grow veg and have lovely flowers in the garden

Good bits:
I have a great husband, three fab kids and a job I love
I walk the dog for about 20 mins every day

Anyone want to join for self- improvement on an encouraging thread?

Hello everyone!

I think even just knowing this thread exists has meant today has been more productive and hence relaxing! I've done some much needed gardening, I have done some decluttering, have about 5 bags to take to the charity shop and have done some exercise! I'm about to sit down and watch a film with the family and have a face mask ready to go on my face!

I think I just need to get into a routine, I read that miracle morning book but I don't want to wake up at 5am!

@Villagetoraiseachild totally hear you on the Easter indulgence 🙈

Me too 😕

So how have people got on with today's targets?
I managed everything bar the shower!
Tomorrow will be more deep cleaning of bedroom following clothes moth discovery and then putting away clean clothes!
If I have the energy I may also wipe down the outside clothes line so that it can be used over spring and summer. I also need to get petrol for the car.
The shower will happen at some point but it seems a bit counter productive to have a shower in the morning then spend all day cleaning!
I am feeling quite headachy and have had ear infections for the last 6 weeks so am going to take pain killers and do my ear drops and get an early night!
I have my clothes sorted out for tomorrow.

Hi and welcome @HouseByTheSeaside 😁
Don’t worry if you haven’t started yet - we’re all muddling through it together! Sometimes having loads of things all at once is overwhelming and can make you trip up, then give up. For me, there’s definitely a ‘keystone’ thing - if I get it right, the rest falls much more easily into place. My keystone thing is exercise. Easy, don’t have to go anywhere exercise. Trainers on, out the back door. If I have done a run, I am much less likely to fall foul of snacking, a late night or overthinking later on.

What do you think your ‘keystone’ thing is? Maybe you could just start with that and see what else falls into place?

@Okisenough Sounds like you had a great day! Well done on the decluttering, the gardening and the exercise! Brilliant! Hope you enjoy the film. What is on your list for tomorrow!?

@EducatingArti I hope the service was nice. I am not religious but the meditative, community and singing parts of churchgoing appeal to me 😁
Well done on your day. I hope you have a great night’s sleep. I’ve got my clothes out ready for tomorrow too!

I'd like to join.

In the long run I'd like to lose 6-7 stone but in the short term I'd like to remember to use skin care morning and evening, wear make up and make my hair presentable. Stop biting my nails and get more sleep

Don't feel good about myself in anyway.
All my kids good bits come from my husband and the bad bits from me.

Welcome @Imamumgetmeoutofhere 😁 How old are your children? Mine are a bit older now but for the first ten years I could barely go to the loo uninterrupted let alone manage makeup!
so, let’s start now. Can you get your skincare stuff out ready for the morning, set an alarm so you have time to do it and get to bed?

@Imamumgetmeoutofhere Oh lovely, I am sure that isn’t true. But it does sound as though you are exhausted. It’s really hard carrying on and looking after everyone else when you’ve got nothing left to give.
Can you get to bed!

Sorry that should have been a ? I’m not ordering you to bed
<<though I am a bit bossy>>
😂😂

@SpringOn not that young sadly, 9 and 15. But husband works 40+ hour weeks (high stress role in local government) and I do 30 hours in 2 1/2 days (nhs role) so we are always busy, tired and stressed.

Something is going to give soon and I really don't know what it is, I just have visions of my marriage failing. My mental health is in bits though I'm getting help for that.

@Imamumgetmeoutofhere with both of you working so hard no wonder you are exhausted.

Well maybe for you this will be self-preservation rather than self-improvement.

When things get really tough for me I have a ‘Back to basics’ list for each day which helps me keep my head above water.
Shower
Healthy food
Vitamins
Some sort of get out for a walk. Even if only 10 minutes. And breathe the air, and notice that I am doing it

And keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Big hugs from me, sounds very tough.

@SpringOn thank you. It's hard, and I have a feeling it will get harder when DS is in GCSE year from September.

I just don't seem to prioritise me, hence the weight gain and lack of personal grooming. Once everyone else has all they need, the meals they like and the house is clean and tidy all my energy is gone and I flop on the sofa with tea and biscuits (or a gin and cheese and biscuits if it's not a work night) and end up falling asleep. Even on my days off they aren't days off as I can't do anything on my 12 hour days (or even my 6 hour day really as that's around the school run) so I spend it doing house work, food shopping etc.

I'd do anything for a lie in 😴

Yes please!!! After being a healthy weight all through my 30s I started to put on weight as I approached forty and nothing I do seems to shift it.

I've always done a lot of exercise but it wasn't putting at dent in it and as I am apple shaped I have been seriously worried about the fat around my middle.

I started personal training with an amazing lady in December and these are my results so far.

I know I need to keep it up as there is still more belly fat to go (though I'm really pleased with b losing the far rolls on my back) so would really appreciate some encouragement.

@Imamumgetmeoutofhere I totally get it.

Totally.

I think a lot of us here are the same. We put ourselves at the bottom of the list and wonder why we feel like we’ve been run over and left for dead all the time.

Is there a small thing that you can do consistently that will help?

Welcome to the gang @onedaywhenifallinlove and WOW! That is incredible progress, and you’ve made that progress in an area which is really difficult to shift! Amazing, go you!

How much and what training are you doing?

More water, more sleep and some healthy food rather than micro meals. I'd probably need to batch cook at the weekend and then freeze but I would probably be doable

Thank you! It's lovely to be amongst like minded people.

To be honest my base exercise levels haven't changed much. I walk around 3 miles a day then do two or three sessions of maybe GRIT or BodyPump. Used to run but don't bother with that since PT.

I go to PT once a week; it's all compound movements with weights (so for e.g. shoulder presses while lungeing) then interspersed with 45 seconds of hideous cardio type stuff like burpees and mountain climbers.

The PT feels awful while I'm doing it but has pushed me far past anything I've ever felt capable of and now I think because my core is a lot stronger I'm engaging it without thinking now so that's making things like BodyPump more effective.

I feel a lot stronger, the scales haven't shifted much but I'm focusing on photo evidence!

@SpringOn we fly back from hols tomorrow so am writing that day off. Easter Sunday goals are a dog walk and not having too much wine when we see friends. Easter Monday def more set up for decluttering though and maybe even a (short) run!

I’d love to join for some support and accountability! I only want to lose a stone but it’s the same stone I’ve been trying to lose for 3 years.

I started off this week feeling really motivated to try intermittent fasting and cutting out snacks and I thought it was all going well for 3 days, then I weighed myself and I’d put on a lb. Gutted! Anyway, today has been a disaster as a result.

I just need to stick to a plan and not weigh myself as often I think, so I don’t go off track when the results don’t go my way.

In addition to intermittent fasting I am trying to:

• walk more
• get on top of my life admin
• clear out and spring clean house

This is a great thread @SpringOn, I'd love to join too.

I've also got about a stone to lose, but I feel like I've been in self sabotage mode - lots of big bowls of pasta and random chocolate bars, croissants in cafes etc. I'm trying to get back into not eating after my evening meal 5 times a week, and I've been thinking about effectively making those days 16:8 by not eating until lunchtime the morning after, but I don't know if there's any point if it's not every day.

I walk 2-5 miles a few times a week to drop off/pick up kids and go to work, but I know it's not enough exercise. I'd like to do a bit of strength training, pilates and ideally find a sport I can enjoy doing with other people.

I'm trying to stick to a basic evening tidy up and do a bit more cleaning at other tines, but overwhelmed by stuff and not great at getting things done around 2 and 5 year old. Then I just want to relax once they're in bed.

And I look pretty bad. I think I need to sort out skin care (plus improving diet) but I don't really know where to start.

Yes please! What a nice friendly post, thank you.
I'm early 50's, meno, need to lose 3 stone but aiming 1llb a week, having some MH issues and feel a bit lost and lonely really. Some of the changes I'd like to make are, being more active daily as I'm v sedentary when off work, socialise a bit more, get hair sorted, process that my DC have left home forever and my life is different. I just want to enjoy life again.

Hi, joining too please. 50 and have 5 stone to lose. Have just lost 7lb in the last 20 days by eating low carb and 5:2. Need to start daily walking. Renovating a house with DH and have lots of jobs to finish over the next 1-2 months as well as sorting out all our stuff most of which is all over the garage before moving later in the year. Lots of stress and things going on as well. DH just been diagnosed with diabetes and needs to lose weight too so we're doing it together.