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Original poster

Farting in bed.

183 replies

tokka · 02/04/2023 20:53

Chatting with a close friend a few days ago over a coffee. We've known each other for years so nothings ever off topic.

She was taken aback when i disclosed that for years I've farted in bed and my DH ( who also farts in bed too ) isn't bothered in the slightest.

Would this be a deal breaker for you? Or are you also Teamfartinbed?

OP posts:
ALongHardWinter · 03/04/2023 16:06

I'm just waiting for the posters who will claim that they NEVER fart anywhere,let alone in bed! 😅

Enfys1982 · 03/04/2023 16:11

I can’t imagine being so po faced that I’d never find humour in a good fart.

DaisyBuchannan27 · 03/04/2023 16:15

I never used to fart in front of DH. It's my second marriage and I was very self conscious when we got together about my body during sex after two kids and a pretty much terrible sexless first marriage.
I was paranoid enough that he would go off me so never ever farted.

But seven years in, post Covid and lockdowns- I have got over myself.
My DH is so lovely that he says every time I fart it makes him happy because he knows that I trust him enough to do so. He will still fancy me and want to have sex with me no matter what.
I still do get a bit embarrassed if he comments on it though!

jaqueandjill · 03/04/2023 16:19

threeplusmum · 03/04/2023 13:24

Disgusting, it's not ladylike to openly fart and stink up the place.

Ladylike 🤣

So it's acceptable for men to succumb to normal bodily functions but women should not...they should either be in discomfort or inconvenience themselves to leave the room in case they are heard?

Yeah, no thanks.

Scalottia · 03/04/2023 16:25

Enfys1982 · 03/04/2023 16:11

I can’t imagine being so po faced that I’d never find humour in a good fart.

I can't imagine that not everybody has the same sense of humour! We all find different things funny/not funny. Imagine that!

Farts are normal and can be funny. Cocking a leg or being proud of stinking out the room isn't. To me, anyway.

To the PP who said they DTD (cringe term, just say 'have sex' like a normal adult), what relevance does that have to farting?

@DaisyBuchannan27 what the fuck does farting in front of your partner have to do with trust? What a strange thing to say. It's a normal bodily function, not an affair.

Bepis · 03/04/2023 16:42

Scalottia · 03/04/2023 15:20

You are correct about only living once, @Sweet89, but I prefer my short, once-only life not to involve people 'letting one out, leaving the room and hearing the heaving later.' I mean, to each their own and all but that is just disgusting.

Farts happen, burps happen - we're all human, but the attitude of some PP is just juvenile. 'Tee hee we have farting competitions in bed. Aren't we hilarious and cool!' Then again a lot of mumsnetters seem to pride themselves on who can be the most disgusting.

Why not though? If 2 people genuinely find it funny and even if they want to have farting competitions in bed, who are they harming? Life is too short to not have a good laugh.

Cam22 · 03/04/2023 16:55

Some people are so skanky.

Rubyupbeat · 03/04/2023 17:07

Disgusting, it would make me sick if he did that. We've been married38 years and it's never happened. Lots of other disgusting habits, but not that .

Hillrunning · 03/04/2023 17:44

Coldspringtime · 03/04/2023 14:42

What do you do then if you need to fart or burp. Ger out of bed and go to another room?

Show quote history

As I said I wouldn't be 'open and obvious'. so just as you might in a meeting or at a restaurant. Burps don't need to be open-mouthed and noisy, you can keep your mouth closed or use your hand. Farts can be let out gently with little noise without cocking a leg, or facing your arse to someone else or as a flatmate used to do- try to sit on top of me. My husband and I spend most of our time to laughing, we find all sorts of thing amusing, so it's not like we are uptight or miserable, it's just farting isn't our type of humour.

Bepis · 03/04/2023 17:46

@Hillrunning No no no nope! I absolutely could not cope with someone sitting on me and farting. I would find that vile.

GalileoHumpkins · 03/04/2023 17:46

Life is too short to not have a good laugh

There are plenty of other things to have a good laugh about.

every time I fart it makes him happy

Weird flex but ok...

Hillrunning · 03/04/2023 17:52

Bepis · 03/04/2023 17:46

@Hillrunning No no no nope! I absolutely could not cope with someone sitting on me and farting. I would find that vile.

Exactly. And I do understand if couples or families all find it funny, peoplecan do what they want in theirown homes. I do draw the line at adults who do it to/around other adults knowing they won't enjoy it. The flatmate knew none of us liked it and it is precisely that she found amusing.

Bepis · 03/04/2023 17:54

@Hillrunning I completely agree with you there. If someone doesn't like it then the other person should try their best to be discrete.

In my case, me and DH both have a laugh with it but if he couldn't stand it, I would be more careful.

Seriously could not cope with anyone actually sitting on me and doing it though. I think I'd be sick 😂

GlassBunion · 03/04/2023 17:57

I would literally blow up if I didn't fart in bed.

Love means being able to comfortably fart in each other's company.

ParagraphOne · 03/04/2023 18:05

Having been in a few relationships my thoughts are that if you want to remain sexy it's better you don't both fart purposely in front of each other. Obviously it may happen by mistake/asleep!

Once you get to the point of openly farting, picking noses and general unpleasant habits it doesn't show much effort or respect imo. Dp and I have never purposely farted in front of each other.

Appreciate it may not be unattractive/disrespectful to others though, each to their own.

mydogisthebest · 03/04/2023 18:09

It's all very well posters saying it's disgusting or whatever as they are, obviously, entitled to their own opinions but I take it that none of them have IBS.

I have good and bad days but on a bad day I can fart almost non stop. I can't hold them in and it would be ridiculous if I had to keep running out of the room to the toilet or wherever.

I don't do it on purpose and nor do I make a big thing of it. Thank goodness DH doesn't feel the way some posters do

ThisIsWednesday · 03/04/2023 18:39

My aged body is at that point where I let rip just walking through the living room. Absolutely zero control over it.
So far I've managed to keep it just to the house. God forbid it starts happening at work. (Maybe I'm more relaxed at home?)
My husband is well aware that I fart. (Being a human and all.) He also heard a rumour that I burp, pee and even poo like other humans.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 03/04/2023 18:53

No no no nope! I absolutely could not cope with someone sitting on me and farting. I would find that vile.

Make sure that you never have a baby or a toddler, then - it's their proudest farty party piece!!

Bepis · 03/04/2023 18:55

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 03/04/2023 18:53

No no no nope! I absolutely could not cope with someone sitting on me and farting. I would find that vile.

Make sure that you never have a baby or a toddler, then - it's their proudest farty party piece!!

😂 mine are grown up now but it didn't tend to bother me with them. Another adult would though.

QueefQueen80s · 04/04/2023 17:21

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 03/04/2023 18:53

No no no nope! I absolutely could not cope with someone sitting on me and farting. I would find that vile.

Make sure that you never have a baby or a toddler, then - it's their proudest farty party piece!!

Oh come on, that's a totally different thing.

QueefQueen80s · 04/04/2023 17:22

mydogisthebest · 03/04/2023 18:09

It's all very well posters saying it's disgusting or whatever as they are, obviously, entitled to their own opinions but I take it that none of them have IBS.

I have good and bad days but on a bad day I can fart almost non stop. I can't hold them in and it would be ridiculous if I had to keep running out of the room to the toilet or wherever.

I don't do it on purpose and nor do I make a big thing of it. Thank goodness DH doesn't feel the way some posters do

Your case is different because you can't help it.

TheWorldisGoingMad · 04/04/2023 17:23

It really depends on what's been eaten. If you're going to clear a room it's a problem in bed. 😳😂

Lampzade · 04/04/2023 17:24

ParagraphOne · 03/04/2023 18:05

Having been in a few relationships my thoughts are that if you want to remain sexy it's better you don't both fart purposely in front of each other. Obviously it may happen by mistake/asleep!

Once you get to the point of openly farting, picking noses and general unpleasant habits it doesn't show much effort or respect imo. Dp and I have never purposely farted in front of each other.

Appreciate it may not be unattractive/disrespectful to others though, each to their own.

I agree

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 04/04/2023 19:05

Oh come on, that's a totally different thing.

It was only a lighthearted comment!

QueefQueen80s · 05/04/2023 09:52

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 04/04/2023 19:05

Oh come on, that's a totally different thing.

It was only a lighthearted comment!

Fair enough, soz! I always laughed my head off at my kids doing it 🤣 and didn't care about their smell, still don't want another adult doing it near me.