Are you afraid of dying?

[usernamechanged1]

I seem to swing between being fully accepting that it’ll come to us all, and dreading the thought of it.

What’s your take?

Yes. I'm not scared of death though. Death in my opinion is like before you were born.. it's just nothing.

However yes I'm scared of dying. I've seen two much loved family members die and both times it was painful, degrading and terrifying. My dad died with a look of pure terror and anguish on his face. I know its not like that for everyone and some do have peaceful deaths but having never seen one.. yes, it's something that scares me.

No. But I’m terrified of dying and leaving my DC orphans (DH died when they were tiny). In 30 or 40 years’ time, I’ll quite happily slip off quietly - and hopefully join DH.

I've been depressed my whole life and many many times wished I didn't exist. Not suicidal but if someone could have clicked their fingers and let me sleep forever I would have taken it. But I've had a recent serious health scare and now I want to live and am absolutely terrified that I will die or be incapacitated with no quality of life.

Afraid of what it would be, I guess. If it's just cease to exist, I can't get on board with not being reunited with those who've passed who I’m desperate to be with again. Souls have to mean something right?
What if DD (too young yet) is left without me?
Also scared that it's some kind of bleak, blank consciousness you're stuck in alone forever.

About a minute after I commented, one of my daughters school photos from the year my Grandad died fell off my wall making a bloody loud noise. Frightened the life out of me. Huge coincidence maybe but if that's a hint, I'll take it 🙈

Not afraid, just very curious as to what happens.

Yes I'm afraid of death because I'm a scaredy cat with no religion but worry that my own stupid imagination will create something awful before I go!

Not frightened of the state of being dead in the slightest. It seems rather bizarre to be frightened of a state of non-existence.

I wouldn't like to be frail, ill, or incapacitated, but there is the comfort of knowing that under certain circumstances options such as assisted dying exist. Well past time we stopped hiding behind bullshit excuses and made it a reality in the UK. We treat animals more humanely and with more compassion that we permit ourselves when it comes to other human beings, and that is a ridiculous state of affairs.

Assuming I will die in bed of old age or some incurable disease - as long as I'm medicated up to the eyeballs I am fine with dying. I feel it would be quite spiritual to fade away and fall asleep forever.
I would not want my loved ones to sit by my bed and watch me breathe my last breath. If I have any control left I would wait until they left the room.

@ComeOnNumber100 🌺

Thank you, this has warmed my heart (and brought a tear to my eye)

I’m mid-40s and so not old, but been through a lot - death of a child, divorce, being a single mum, etc. I won’t ever experience what it is to give my child the family life he craves for when he sees those around him with siblings and 2 parents together. I doubt I’ll meet anyone and experience love again. I’ll soon have to pack up my life and leave my home in a matter of weeks with no idea what will meet me at the other side of all the change. I’m tired of battling through things alone.

@Xrays thank you so very much for sharing that! 💕

It’s the people I would leave behind that scares me, my kids and dh, my parents, all would be lost and bereft. I know we all die, I just want to be old enough that my kids are grown up and not so vulnerable to the world

For those terrified, hypnotherapy can really help

Can you tell us more?

I’m not afraid of dying per se, but I get sad at the thought of not being here for my kids and my grandchildren so I hope I’ve got at least another 20 years in me.

How does one become enlightened?

I had an experience where I had to go to theatre to be cardioverted. Now I believe this is a very routine procedure, but at the time they basically told me they were stopping and restarting my heart and there was a risk of stroke. If I didn't have the procedure there was also a risk of stroke (HR was something ridiculous like 160-180 BPM and I was in AF). I had just had a baby and I was terrified. By the time I was wheeled to theatre though (and everyone was lovely) a sort of peace descended and I thought "oh well if I go I won't know about it".

I once read (apologies for the those who aren't woo) "the body dies because the spirit has left, the spirit doesn't leave because the body has died"... I hope that is true!

I'd love to hear more of NDEs if anyone wants to share.

Yes and no. In death I will leave about £300K in life insurances for my family (household income is £40K a year and living in a council flat so we're unlikely to see that much money at once in our lives) but what gives me most peace is knowing that I have raised wonderful children. They're smart, happy, extremely polite, kind and loving children/teens who will make the world a better place even if I'm gone. They are a legacy I'm proud to leave. Their dad is also the most wonderful man who is 100% involved in the child rearing and even household chores. He knows their likes and dislikes, hobbies and friends. As long as they still have him, they'd be just fine without me.

I just don't want to leave them. Ever. I want to see their exciting futures. I want to be at their weddings and babysit their children. I don't want to miss a thing. So in that way, I am afraid of dying.

Afraid of dying, no. But I want to live as long as I possibly can because I love our life.

NDE fascinate me as well as bring huge comfort. If anyone would be kind enough to further share their experiences would be wonderful.

I think the main fear I have is a feeling of being alone, I'm a great lover of company in all that I do and worry that I will feel lonely as I leave the world

I had an haemorrhage associated with a miscarriage, my blood pressure was below 70/20 and I was drifting in and out of consciousness. A doctor arrived and told be he had to run through the hospital to get to me. I told him he shouldn't run in a hospital, just as I passed a very large blood clot. Then I was drifting into unconsciousness, I felt so at peace I remember thinking I was dying, and was totally OK with it.