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Original poster

Where to put all these kids?! Wwyd?

667 replies

MissMooley · 25/03/2023 21:00

Wasn't sure where to post this to get the most advice.
Basically I'm in a 3 bed house. Me, dds 14 & 19, and ds 11&8.
Currently, dd 14 & 19 have their own rooms, and the boys share. I have a bed in the living room.
It's worked for us nicely, but now I'm due twins in 10 weeks 😂🙈
I have no idea where they're going lol
My options so far are:

1- Scrap having a living room and just make it a full bedroom for me and the twins.

2- make the living room a full bedroom, and move the sofa etc into the outshed, but not sure how that will go in winter, it gets pretty cold and I don't have the money to fully convert it (also a council house, so would need permission I assume?)

That's it. I don't like the idea of having no living room but there's literally no space to have the cots and all the baby stuff in there with my bed and the sofa etc too.

I've considered the girls sharing, but eldest has asd and several mh disorders so can't see that working for her.

Just feel a bit stuck and hoping someone has a magic solution I haven't thought of!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Nimbostratus100 · 25/03/2023 21:31

how long will your 19 year old live at home for, do you think?

Wellillsayitifnoonelsewill · 25/03/2023 21:33

MissMooley · 25/03/2023 21:28

@Wellillsayitifnoonelsewill getting hold of them is a nightmare. I'm going to the offices in person next step.
I tried to private rent before, but having 4 kids seemed to put landlords off.

To be clear, I don't expect them to rehouse me. I will pop myself back on the list, but I chose to continue with this pregnancy knowing it would be tough. Just looking for the best solution 😊

Sorry I meant do the ducal not have any private four beds they would give you? They usually have contracts with owners of houses (think multi property private landlords that “give” the house to social housing )

Luredbyapomegranate · 25/03/2023 21:36

The only viable option is a room divider for the girls, with you and the twins taking the 3rd bedroom.

If you take out the living room, there will be less spaces for the kids to get some quiet and that will impact on homework and their life chances. It’s really not good.

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Original poster
MissMooley · 25/03/2023 21:51

@Nimbostratus100 no clue, at least another few years I'd imagine.
@Luredbyapomegranate the living room is rarely used by the kids at this point anyway with it already being half a bedroom

OP posts:
Comedycook · 25/03/2023 21:54

Girls in one room
Boys in one room
You and twins in other room

Businessflake · 25/03/2023 22:00

Maybe you should have thought about this before deciding to get pregnant, again?

Comedycook · 25/03/2023 22:01

Businessflake · 25/03/2023 22:00

Maybe you should have thought about this before deciding to get pregnant, again?

Bit late now!

But I am perplexed by people who make their lives harder than it needs to be.

Original poster
MissMooley · 25/03/2023 22:04

@Businessflake well that goes without saying. Not exactly a planned situation, but I'm dealing with it as best as I can 🙂

OP posts:
NorthernDrizzle · 25/03/2023 22:04

Girl and Boy twins are unusual unless IVF or on fertility treatment you were very unlucky to end up with twins.

Original poster
MissMooley · 25/03/2023 22:06

@NorthernDrizzle apparently its my age that's most likely done it

OP posts:
Redebs · 25/03/2023 22:08

If your living room has a gas fire/heater in it, it cannot be used as a bedroom.
If that applies to your situation, you need to get it capped beforehand.

I would do everything possible to avoid losing a living room though. Better for the girls to share and twins in with you for a couple of years at least, until someone moves out.

PurplePansy05 · 25/03/2023 22:09

Do you have a partner living with you as well? What does he think? Would he be in the same room as you and the twins?

I saw a great post the other day on social media, someone divided their children's bedroom into two using bunk beds partly built into a stud wall. Another alternative is to use wardrobesa as room dividers so both kids get privacy. You could divide every bedroom this way as long as windows layout allows for it.

Namechange224422 · 25/03/2023 22:14

How about working out a way to convert the outshed into a self contained room for your 19 year old? That would have the advantage that she would have some space from the babies too.

Would it be feasible to make it as warm and comfortable as possible? And then buy her a heated blanket etc to use overnight?

Then you and twins in her room, lounge as a living room until they are too big to share with you and then you move back into lounge.

NursieBernard · 25/03/2023 22:14

Your DD's need to share and you and the twins can then have a bedroom. Could you help your DD with an application for PIP and start looking at the possibility of supported living for her if she meets the criteria.

Kaylisa · 25/03/2023 22:19

How big is your lounge?
do you have a kitchen diner?

If lounge is decent size then you could section it off, half your room with babies and half as lounge? Maybe use a large Kallax unit as a divider. Or B&Q do room dividers.
If you have a long kitchen diner, maybe get rid of table, have dining end as lounge and then you can use all of the living room as bedroom and just have all the living space in the kitchen ? could get fold up table for sitting down to eat.
Otherwise, if the largest bedroom is big enough to split, either build a fake wall and put the girls in their so they still have room each but contained into the one bedroom. Then you and babies have one of the other rooms and boys have the other.
Another option could be to save and get a large cabin for the garden and do it out for your eldest? Then you and babies have her bedroom?

Cherrybl0ssm · 25/03/2023 22:19

Ps congratulations on your babies.
If your DDs can’t share then I think night owl DD is in front room.
You and babies in the biggest bedroom.

Yoyooo · 25/03/2023 22:19

Nothing to add OP, just wanted to say you come across really lovely.

Best situation IMO probably is boys in one, girls in another but partitioned and you in the other with the babies.

Don't forget the toddler years, a living space for them to run riot will be useful!

determinedtomakethiswork · 25/03/2023 22:20

NorthernDrizzle · 25/03/2023 22:04

Girl and Boy twins are unusual unless IVF or on fertility treatment you were very unlucky to end up with twins.

Not true. My sister has two sets of twins, each set is boy/girl and no medical intervention at all.

minisoksmakehardwork · 25/03/2023 22:20

@NorthernDrizzle - non ID twins can be inherited, and the chances can increase with age and more pregnancies. My third was a twin pregnancy. No known history of twins in my family.

As awful as it is, council will consider your eldest an adult with her own responsibility to house herself. Unless you are claiming carers allowance for looking after her.

I would honestly consider how you could divide the room and look into alternative, supported if needed accommodation for her. I have 4 dc. 1 boy and 1 girl have adhd/ASC. Not sharing is not an option in our current 3 bed. We've done our best to give each child a small amount of space which is their own and it is good for their social skills to have to learn how to live with and adapt to others needs as well.

Kaylisa · 25/03/2023 22:23

Kaylisa · 25/03/2023 22:19

How big is your lounge?
do you have a kitchen diner?

If lounge is decent size then you could section it off, half your room with babies and half as lounge? Maybe use a large Kallax unit as a divider. Or B&Q do room dividers.
If you have a long kitchen diner, maybe get rid of table, have dining end as lounge and then you can use all of the living room as bedroom and just have all the living space in the kitchen ? could get fold up table for sitting down to eat.
Otherwise, if the largest bedroom is big enough to split, either build a fake wall and put the girls in their so they still have room each but contained into the one bedroom. Then you and babies have one of the other rooms and boys have the other.
Another option could be to save and get a large cabin for the garden and do it out for your eldest? Then you and babies have her bedroom?

Sorry just seen you did say your lounge isn’t that big so scrap one of my suggestions to section part off as bedroom

Mammyloveswine · 25/03/2023 22:25

Op you don't mention a partner but he needs to help support his children...

Original poster
MissMooley · 25/03/2023 22:26

Thanks for all the suggestions, I think I'm going to look into dividing a room for the girls if sorting the outshed can't work.

I'll also look into pip for eldest. I don't claim carers or anything as I earn too much.

Just me and the kids living here.

And no gas appliances in the living room
X

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 25/03/2023 22:26

Ypur oodest couldd move into supported luving near by at some point. How much support does she need? Start asking social workers. (Adult with disabiilities team)for now yes use lounge as bedroom

cestlavielife · 25/03/2023 22:29

Dies she have ehcp? Will be the team dealing with up to 25 yr olds but as sn adult she has different options for supported housing eg my borough can allocate one bed flats to people with low support needs who can manage on their own fir some of the time.

Throwncrumbs · 25/03/2023 22:30

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