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Original poster

Sleeping in the living or dining room - making it work

249 replies

gwrachod · 04/03/2023 23:17

We're 4 people in a 3 bed - my DC's dad and I live as if a couple still, even though we haven't shared a bed for years, and never will again.

Eventually, we'll either split or move to a bigger house, but neither are on the cards just now, so I need to work out a semi-permanent solution.

The DC are 10 and 15.

I was on the sofa in the living room for the first few years, then we swapped last summer. DP is on the sofa, but it just isn't working having the living room doubling up as his bedroom, I knew it wouldn't (which is why I chose the sofa originally). So, I need to work out how else to do it.

There is one v. large bedroom. DS (15) is in it and I'd like to keep him there, as he's getting bigger and needs space for his hobbies and studying for his GCSEs.

Then there's also a double bedroom, a single bedroom and the dining room, the same size as the double.

I'm thinking DD in the double, so she has space to play and have mates round, "DP" in the single and me in the dining room.

But I'm not keen on losing the dining room completely.

Am I mad to think I could keep it as a dual function room? I've been looking at daybeds and thinking of having it as a dual function room. Is this a crazy idea?

If I do that there's no space for a wardrobe, I'd maybe have to get a large wardrobe for DD's room and share it, or convert the hall cupboard into my wardrobe.

Or, should I just accept we lose the dining room, and always eat in the front room?

What would you do?

OP posts:
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Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:01

quietnightmare · 04/03/2023 23:28

Where are your clothes now?

The smaller double still has my stuff and also and DP's stuff in it - 2 chests of drawers and a (flimsy, cheap) wardrobe.

OP posts:
Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:04

Seaweed42 · 04/03/2023 23:32

Can you put a stud wall into the very large bedroom and create two small single for yourself and DH?

Seems crazy to have two kids in very large double rooms while losing half the living space downstairs.

Not going to split the room. Any serious money needs to go towards making the house more sellable so we can get out of here and get a new house that suits. But I can't see that happening for 6 months minimum, possibly another year or so.

Going up into the attic would, but I don't have that kind of money at the moment.

OP posts:
Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:05

MeinKraft · 04/03/2023 23:27

I can't believe you've both been sleeping on this sofa all this time rather than turn the dining room into a bedroom. You all need a proper bed to sleep in.

You and your ex could get bunk beds Grin

Haha. In a word, no Grin

OP posts:

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Home improvement
mathanxiety · 05/03/2023 01:12

Split the big bedroom using a temporary wall. It just needs to be a framework of wood with thin drywall or plywood nailed over. The cost would be minimal and you would get two bedrooms. No nailing into ceiling or walls or floors needed.

www.instructables.com/Lightweight-Room-Dividers-a-Temporary-Wall-for-Ren/?amp_page=true

Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:17

Redglitter · 04/03/2023 23:48

There is one v. large bedroom. DS (15) is in it and I'd like to keep him there, as he's getting bigger and needs space for his hobbies and studying for his GCSEs

Surely the opposite is the case for a 15 year old. They generally need less space. They only need a desk to study.

Splitting it sounds sensible. Even if you and your husband have very small rooms if it's split at least you have a bedroom

I don't want to go into his hobbies as it's outing, but trust me, he needs the space. They're good hobbies to have and I'm delighted he has creative interests. We gave him the big room about a year ago and I'm happy with that decision. I'm not going to move him out now.

And anyway, when we had it, we were wasting the space.

I don't want to share with "DP" and it's not practical to split it, so it'll stay DS's.

OP posts:
Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:21

mathanxiety · 05/03/2023 01:12

Split the big bedroom using a temporary wall. It just needs to be a framework of wood with thin drywall or plywood nailed over. The cost would be minimal and you would get two bedrooms. No nailing into ceiling or walls or floors needed.

www.instructables.com/Lightweight-Room-Dividers-a-Temporary-Wall-for-Ren/?amp_page=true

It won't work. There is only one window, and if you split it into two long narrow rooms, so each gets a bit of window, then the door would have to go through the single bedroom, this loosing a room, or take a corner out of the other room, making it very small.

I would feel awful for taking DS's room off him.

And it'd be a huge upheaval and expense that I'd much rather spend on getting the house saleable so we can move on.

Honestly, this suggestion makes my heart sink.

I'd rather go back on the sofa than do this to my house, or to DS.

OP posts:
Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:29

FiddleLeaf · 04/03/2023 23:50

Loaf have some great looking beds that fold down into footstools so it’s possible to have the dining room looking normal

Ooh, I love the stuff on that website, thank you!

These hide the bed away well.

What do you think they're like to sleep on regularly?

My parents vad an expensive sofabed that was bloody uncomfortable! But that was years ago.

Have you tried one of these?

loaf.com/products/bed-in-button?size=double-4&slide=9

OP posts:
Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:31

Undecidedandtorn · 04/03/2023 23:25

Can you fit a table in the front room?

Possibly... It'd need rearranging.

Currently it has a sofa, an armchair, a bookcase, a cupboard and a TV unit.

One of those would have to go.

OP posts:
Original poster
gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:33

Sunshineandrainbow · 05/03/2023 00:00

This is nice, thanks, exactly the kind of thing i'm thinking of.

Is it comfortable enough to sleep on regularly?

OP posts:
salsamad · 05/03/2023 01:34

Use the dining room as your bedroom but choose some transformable furniture so it can still be used for dining and has storage.

Sleeping in the living or dining room - making it work
Sleeping in the living or dining room - making it work
Sleeping in the living or dining room - making it work
LadyJ2023 · 05/03/2023 02:09

I know loads of people that have changed a dining room into a bedroom instead tho not because exes live with them for a kid usually lol

BeesOnLavender · 05/03/2023 02:43

If you're all having plenty of personal space upstairs in your bedrooms, do you need a living room? How about sacrificing that room to DP as a bedroom and then creating a big kitchen diner with a table the whole family can sit round, a TV and plenty of storage?

Sounds like everyone has/has room for TV/games consoles etc upstairs. Get those high up beds with the desk underneath if space is an issue. Your older teen can have a sofa/daybed/sofabed in his large room for friends to hang out/stay over so they're not monopolising the kitchen.

When he goes to university the younger one gets his room and he gets the single room when he comes back in the holidays. By that age he can go out with friends instead of having them over so much. Will stop him getting too settled after university too, if he's in a tiny single room he'll have more incentive to move out, and there'll be no room for him to essentially move a girlfriend in by having her stay over constantly.

When DS moves out, DP can have the single room and you get the living room back for it's proper purpose again. Stops DP getting too settled with the situation if he doesn't have a double sized room.

ChloeIsabel · 05/03/2023 02:53

What about something like this. It’s got good reviews.

Sleeping in the living or dining room - making it work
BeesOnLavender · 05/03/2023 02:53

Splitting the big bedroom would be awful. Those basic "walls" offer zero soundproofing so it feels like limited privacy. Also, one person ends up with a room with a window, which they can't get into/out of easily. The other ends up with a room with no windows which is depressing and someone constantly disturbing their peace wanting to come through to enter/exit their own room.

MysteryBelle · 05/03/2023 03:09

I’d put 15yr old in double bedroom (maximize the space to fit his hobbies and study area), 10yr old in single bedroom (make it cozy for her and her friends with one of those magical filmy tent things in the corner that hang from the ceiling and drape fairy lights round it), and in very large bedroom put up a wall with door in it to divide it into two bedrooms for you and dc’s dad. I would make his part smaller hee hee, seriously he won’t need as big a space as you and make sure you keep the closet in your part.

Sleeping in the living room or dining room long term is no way to live. I’m surprised you’ve been doing it for years. It also discourages the kids from socializing downstairs with you for family time.

RotundBeagle · 05/03/2023 03:10

namechange1487 · 04/03/2023 23:53

Sorry, got to ask. Do you date other people?

If not, share a room if it's still all close?

I was wondering same thing!

MysteryBelle · 05/03/2023 03:10

BeesOnLavender · 05/03/2023 02:53

Splitting the big bedroom would be awful. Those basic "walls" offer zero soundproofing so it feels like limited privacy. Also, one person ends up with a room with a window, which they can't get into/out of easily. The other ends up with a room with no windows which is depressing and someone constantly disturbing their peace wanting to come through to enter/exit their own room.

The dad would obviously get the 1/3 of the room with no window and no closet 😀

Ponderingwindow · 05/03/2023 03:23

then Just make the dining room a bedroom and put a small table in the living room. Let the person who has that as a bedroom really have the space

ideas to save space in the living room
Wall mount the tv instead of using a tv cabinet

Keep the dining table pushed against the wall whenever it isn’t being used by the maximum number of required diners. Or even buy one that folds to get it even smaller. Ikea sells some. Get dining chairs that stack when not in use.

couch and then stackable puffs for the extra seating. Adults get priority on real seating if it is a family movie night or something. If you have adult guests over to chat they can use the dining chairs

MysteryBelle · 05/03/2023 03:25

Just read your other post. Let Ds keep largest bedroom then. Let Dd keep double. Ypu should keep the single bedroom. Put coparent in smallest downstairs room (does either one have a door?) and make other room a sitting and dining room with a sofa and a smallish dining table and chairs. Add back armchair etc if there’s room. Or put that tufted ottoman from Loaf that turns into a bed into that smallest downstairs room and use it as bench at dining table or coffee table in living room depending on which is smallest room. I hope I’ve mentioned the word smallest enough times.

StClare101 · 05/03/2023 03:31

No point trying to split a room unless it’s done properly. A stud wall with no soundproofing would be awful. I’d take over the dining room and the family can eat on their knees. Not ideal but it is what it is.

StClare101 · 05/03/2023 03:31

Knees? I meant laps!

MysteryBelle · 05/03/2023 03:36

You gave me a good laugh @StClare101 😂

Sunflowermoonbeam · 05/03/2023 05:27

We have this one. It folds flat and is super comfy to sleep on www.habitat.co.uk/product/9576896

Thekirit · 05/03/2023 05:36

Do you have a plan / sketch .
That would help to see if rooms can be split.

otherwise
DD in the smaller bedroom,,
you in the double bedroom with wardrobe space for both you and dh
dh in the dining room on a sofa bed.

i understand you want DD in the double but if you and dh were sharing a room would your kids both have the doubles.

if not I’d start building or knocking walls down to make another room. But that depends on layout

Thekirit · 05/03/2023 05:39

gwrachod · 05/03/2023 01:21

It won't work. There is only one window, and if you split it into two long narrow rooms, so each gets a bit of window, then the door would have to go through the single bedroom, this loosing a room, or take a corner out of the other room, making it very small.

I would feel awful for taking DS's room off him.

And it'd be a huge upheaval and expense that I'd much rather spend on getting the house saleable so we can move on.

Honestly, this suggestion makes my heart sink.

I'd rather go back on the sofa than do this to my house, or to DS.

Show quote history

It also wouldn’t work as by law a habitable room must have a window. If there was a fire in the hallway, entrance he couldn’t get out.